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| How to turn around a shitty night? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=147095 |
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| Author: | tay [ Sat Sep 29, 2012 7:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How to turn around a shitty night? |
Some nights are total shit. Get rejected left and right. I don't mind it in the beginning but as soon as I can't catch a break, I start to get desperate and pissed off. Last night I tried saying persistent with the girls that said "get away" but I wasn't successful in pushing through. I try to be friendly with everyone to make my value higher but sometimes it's hard to project that when a venue is crowded. It takes too long for people to start noticing this. Besides going to a different venue, what are some techniques to get over this syndrome? I was thinking maybe I should start incorporating canned openers and routines to get a more positive response,but I was never good at memorizing those things. I usually just approach in a confident way and just start talking to them, but some nights this does not work at all. Maybe I am expecting too much since I got some good results in a past month, and I am expecting them to continue, which is not the case apparently. |
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| Author: | snillaheart [ Sat Sep 29, 2012 7:48 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
your problem is inner game you get pissed off because people arent nice to you and you let that affect you emotionally, i recommend reading the power of now by echart tolle, basically you need to be more self amusing and view rejections or bad reactions as something funny and amusing to stay in good mood and be emotionally resorsful to turn a bad night around |
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| Author: | tay [ Sat Sep 29, 2012 8:06 pm ] |
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It takes like 10 rejection for me to start feeling this way. I usually don't project my bad mood, it just what I feel in my head. If I get rejected I just say ok and walk away dancing around. I gotta be more self amused though I guess. |
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| Author: | snillaheart [ Sun Sep 30, 2012 3:29 am ] |
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its always a mix of things, self amusement, reaction seeking etc when i dont get results i like i notice myself focusing on getting people to like me, its like i suddently value the conversation more than the beauty of a hot girl im speaking to. people sense this and its incongruent to my direct approach too i fail to display intent for the hot girl also when out of state, i actually fail to run game. im unconsciously focused on getting validation it makes me reaction seeking, i dont tease or neg or challenge i just stand there saying " o really? " so when youre not feeling it you need to actively focus on the pickup process even if it feels robotic at first |
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| Author: | _Kangaroo [ Sun Sep 30, 2012 3:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How to turn around a shitty night? |
First of all what you are feeling is normal. It's not a syndrome or anything of the sort. For me, the question you need to ask yourself is; is the need to be successful with women the driving point of your interactions? If so, you will need to work a little bit more on your Inner Game. Quote: Last night I tried saying persistent with the girls that said "get away" but I wasn't successful in pushing through. I try to be friendly with everyone to make my value higher but sometimes it's hard to project that when a venue is crowded.
It's always great to be persistent, most guys walk away after a comment of such, giving up. However I'm going to question your intentions with women. Are they clear? When you interact with a woman, does she know where the interaction is heading? What you want from her? This doesn't have to be said directly however she should be feeling that you are genuine in your reasons for talking to her. Whether that be, she'd make a good friend, you are bored, you are attracted to her, you want her as your girlfriend, you want to fuck her etc. Quote: I was thinking maybe I should start incorporating canned openers and routines to get a more positive response,but I was never good at memorizing those things.
Quote: Maybe I am expecting too much since I got some good results in a past month, and I am expecting them to continue, which is not the case apparently.
I question the need to get a positive response. Effectivily by using canned openers and routines, you are stripping yourself of your own unique identity. Sure, they great for building confidence when first starting out. However you've already had success. The great experiences you have had in the past are a clear indication that you are more than capable of attracting women. The problem lies with your current state of mind. I feel once you get rejected consecutively you begin to question your own skills or feel there is a fault with yourself. Thinking in this fashion will throw off your game. Sooner or later you are too pre-occupied in your own thoughts you often neglect what is happening right in front of you. You generally become desperate just to 'break out of this negative momentum' and get her to say something positive. Next time you feel things are starting to get shit, take a step back. Are things actually getting shit. That stranger that turned you down, is their opinion really that important to you that it gets your general mood down? Do you need validation that you are an awesome guy? No, becuase you are awesome. This is Inner Game. A big tip that helped me in my game is to enjoy yourself and have fun too. I mean actually have fun. None of the fake smiles and I'm having such a blast bullshit. Women will know it's fake before you even open your mouth. Enjoy the conversations you hold with people. Listen to the words she says and reply how you would normally if you were talking to a friend. Your responses shouldn't be changing because you are talking to a woman. Nor should they if you are trying to make yourself 'high-value'. It's not something should be forceful. If you are talking to women simply to tick a checklist of things you have to do, ie. get her to smile/laugh, touch you, show interest, kiss you, give you her number, give you a postive response etc. then your intentions with a woman are not genuine. She is just an ego-boost/validation for you. These are some thoughts to reflect upon. Feel feel to ask any questions if needed. - Kang |
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| Author: | tay [ Sun Sep 30, 2012 6:38 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for a lengthy response Kang. I guess the best way to describe that state is I begin to doubt my previous successes, thinking that it was mostly right place right time kind of thing. Yea, and you're right, after few rejections I become fake with my smile and pretending to be having fun. |
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