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"How to Seduce Her in 1 Minute"
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Author:  YouWish99 [ Fri Aug 10, 2012 6:59 pm ]
Post subject:  "How to Seduce Her in 1 Minute"
Or why every pick up artist needs to watch Pretty Woman.

Yeah, yeah, I know it’s a chick flick, but you can learn more in 1 minute watching this movie than you can learn from studying seduction methods for weeks. Specifically what I’m referring to, and some of the principles that make up a cornerstone of my system, is the necklace scene.

Richard Gere’s character is waiting for Julia Robert’s character with the jewelry box. She comes out of the room in that body hugging red dress and white gloves. She’s insecure and looking for reassurance. He withholds. She breaks down and asks if she looks okay. While walking around her checking her out he makes an ambiguous noise that might be approval, or maybe not.

Then he comes back to face her and says, “Something’s missing.” While she’s distracted he pulls out the box and says, “Maybe something in this box.” She focuses on the box and he says, “I don’t want you to get too excited, it’s only on loan.”

She looks at the box. She’s curious. She knows it is a jewelry box, but she doesn’t know exactly what to expect. He opens the box revealing the massive stones on the necklace (movie symbolism about his large…anyway, moving on). She’s in awe. She closes off briefly in disbelief by crossing her arms and then with trepidation she slowly reaches out to touch his big necklace. Then he shocks her by snapping the lid shut like it is trying to bite her. This breaks her emotional/mental state, and causes her to laugh at herself for overreacting.

So, that’s roughly 1 minute to move her from admiring him for his money and having friendly feelings of gratitude for the way he has treated her thus far to a flirty seduction. Now, I know this is a movie, but it certainly puts on display the power of rapid state modulation (RSM).

Let’s break it down:

State 1: Insecure (looking for reassurance)

What he does: Withholds for a moment to amp up her state.

State 2: Confusion

What he does: He makes an ambiguous noise that cannot be sorted out without more information.

Transition: He says, “Something’s missing.” This amps up her confused state distracting her while she tries to figure out what’s missing. And he pulls out the box.

Refocus: He says, “Maybe something in this box.” This suggestion focuses her attention on the box.

State 3: Curiosity

What he does: Gives her an NLP command to get excited. He says, “I don’t want you to get too excited, it’s only on loan.” (The brain has difficultly processing negatives so it seems like he says, “I want you to get (too) excited.” One of the few areas nlp is useful by the way.)

State 4: Excitement

What he does: Opens the box showing her his massive necklace.

State 5: Awe

What he does: He waits until she reaches over to touch it. Then breaks her state by snapping the lid shut on her hand.

State 6: Embarrassment (momentarily)

What he does: Smiles at her being equally amused with himself and reinforcing her state. She thinks: Oh that was silly. I overreacted. You got me.

State 7: Joyous laughter (at herself for overreacting)

7 States in roughly a minute! No openers, no stories, no negs, no C&F. None of that. It was just a simple, straight-ahead example of cycling her through a number of states. This is Rapid State Modulation. It’s a game changer. This is part of what I do in seduction and why it works so quickly and easily.

Why does it work?

It works because most women filter the world through their emotions. If you control her state, you control how she feels. Specifically, you control how (and how much) she feels toward you. The variety of emotions she feels with you keeps her on her toes and makes you seem more interesting. It gives you more depth.

Now, if this were a real life example the next step would be to physically escalate through touch. I’ll give you two examples.

Example 1: Since it is Julia Roberts (and she has that great smile) you could wait for a few seconds until she has calmed down a bit, but is still smiling, and say, “You have a really beautiful smile. Come here.” While you’re saying this you would step in and at the same time slide one arm around the small of her back pulling her toward you and kiss her. It’s bold. It’s simple. And it applies another of my principles (transference (one of several types of transference)) by making use of her positive feelings in the moment to cause her to be compliant to your advance.

Once you’re kissing her she shifts state again into a state of arousal. Not only that, but her joyous laughter state is synergetic with her new state (since the body confuses several states with pre-arousal). Make out with her for a while in the lobby. Skip dinner and take her up to your room.

Example 2: You allow her state to cool thus getting a bigger result from the next state you transition her into. So, you help her put the necklace on. While leaning in you can whisper in her ear or nuzzle her neck. Pull back slightly with your head remaining close to her head (comfort shown through proximity to her implying you share an intimate relationship) and languidly run your finger along her exposed collarbone (an erogenous zone). Say, “You look really good, uh, it looks really good on…” (While trailing off you turn your head to kiss her. Creating movement while you’re talking helps to smooth it out. It’s sort of a planned Freudian slip showing how much she overwhelms you. No I don’t know if there is a term for this.)

By waiting longer between shifting her from her happy state to an aroused state makes the arousal state deeper. The moment hit you and you were powerless. All you could do was submit to her. Whereas the first example was a bold display that lead to the same state. Both work equally well. It’s a stylistic choice. It’s a Game changer.
Author:  DJ_Z [ Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
It's a movie, not reality.
Author:  Anivia [ Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Overanalyzed
Author:  $uave [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:08 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Overanalyzed
precisely.

I haven't seen the movie, but I watched the scene.

Couple points:

1)by the time she was trying the dress the seduction was long underway.
2)it took way longer than a minute to get to that point and it'll take a bit more before she jumps on him.
3)as mentioned above this is a movie.

Now onto your analysis:

a) I didn't see that as a set of steps calculated by him and executed in a precise order, rather the type of personality he had,
here all he did can be summarized:
1)good sense of humor
2) humbleness (he said that the quarter million dollar necklace was nothing to get excited about instead of watching with a look like yeah baby I spent that money on you so now it's a done deal-nobody likes to be treated like a commodity.)
3) playfulness(be it the surprise necklace or snapping the lid in a lighthearted manner or never telling the whole plan for the evening.)
4) class(a man with the plan-and a good one it seems and well used capital helps too)

and what his personality resulted in is:

1)intrigue her
2)nice ass surprise
3)show humbleness
4)casually mention the price of the necklace (and overall cool/casual attitude towards luxury.)
5)keep intriguing her by not telling where they're going

all spiced with good-natured, pranks/jokes. This is all I saw in that clip.
Author:  skills360 [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 1:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Is this the movie about a multimillionaire buying a prostitute? Awesome movie... Everything you see in the movie, just do the total opposite...
Author:  Ezo [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:15 am ]
Post subject: 
Even though it is movie and the moves work mainly because the script says so, you have a point.

Although this particular scene is a bit overanalyzed and the technique you describe would sort under the dark side of seduction, you are not wrong. Women communicate and think emotionally, if you can read and talk to her emotions, you are in.
Author:  pumpington [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:56 am ]
Post subject: 
with a title like how to seduce her in 1 minute... thank god this thread isn't about rape

that scene with the necklace is cute, he opens the box and she giggles, and is all.. that necklace how much is this worth, richard is all like, meh quata millyun, just like it isn't shit, julia's all WOOWWWW teehee *sparkle in eyes*

pretty good stuff
Author:  AJ25 [ Sun Aug 12, 2012 9:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
I like that this seems to reflect an abstract model that could be referred to in many different instances. Any sources for where something like this is explained more elaborately?

But anyway yeah, great post.
Author:  YouWish99 [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 4:47 am ]
Post subject: 
You're right it is a movie and most of it is a fairy tale about prince charming rescuing his Cinderella-like rags to riches princess. However, that scene sticks out. It is NOT a realistic character study about a corporate raider and a prostitute. That would have made it a very dark movie. A lot of what happens is also not what would happen. It is for the sake of the plot. So, just saying model his character isn't useful as it bounces around between being seductive and nice guy behaviors.

You could almost take the scene out of context. In pick up terms the scene would fall around the first (true) date. Before that it was the employer and employee "work" relationship.

Her insecurity was a result of wearing the nice dress instead of the clothes she was comfortable wearing, not because of anything he did. So it isn't particularly dark. It could be if handled the wrong way, but then again what couldn't? Curiosity, excitement, awe, brief embarrassment, and joy are all positive emotional states.

The thing to pay attention to is the mechanics behind it all. I'm not saying you should go out and try to recreate the scene. That would be pointless.

As for the 1 minute thing that was just the time it took the scene in the film to run. Usually you're talking 3-15 minutes from open to close when you're out in the field. That's assuming you're trying to get to the close as quickly as possible. Normally, I'll get the strong attraction right away and then close later because I enjoy the company. Last time it took 3 minutes and then we hung out for 8 hours. I'm assuming it is the same approach I used recently at the bar (I was a wee bit drunk) with the super bitchy girl that was DTF later in the night. That time it took however long it took for one person in front of her to use the bathroom. Couldn't have been more than a few minutes.

Quote:
Any sources for where something like this is explained more elaborately?
Yes.
Author:  Ezo [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 9:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
A lot of what happens is also not what would happen. It is for the sake of the plot.
Actually, that may be exactly what would happen in real life if you have gotten the girl into that state of mind. Unfortunately this is a snapshot of how a girl reacts when she is completely heroworshipping you already, not a guide to take a girl you dont know and get her there from scratch. And if you have gotten her into that mood, you got her anyway, there is no chance you will fail.
Author:  YouWish99 [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Actually, that may be exactly what would happen in real life if you have gotten the girl into that state of mind.
In that scene, yes, but in other parts of the movie where he's just throwing around money or reverting to Mr. Nice Guy, not so much.
Quote:
Unfortunately this is a snapshot of how a girl reacts when she is completely heroworshipping you already, not a guide to take a girl you dont know and get her there from scratch. And if you have gotten her into that mood, you got her anyway, there is no chance you will fail.
Awe (or hero worship) is a strong state and allows you to jump over a lot of other pick up stuff, but it isn't nearly as difficult to reach, as you might believe. One way for the regular guy to get there is to have career aspirations outside of his day job that sync up with things she values. Let's say you're a photographer on the side with a few mid-level credits to your name and she is an aspiring artist. As long as you don't come off as bragging the hero worship state is suddenly as easy to reach as any other state.

Now, state shifting isn't all that different from say your typical DHV spike, but both the number and variety of states add an emotional textured richness. Not only that, but it cuts down on the active seduction time and leaves more time for just enjoying the moment (comfort phase). Especially when you get past the fear of screwing things up after you have already made a connection by not feeling like you have to act on them at that moment.

When you're working from scratch there are still a lot of similarities. You still have multiple states, you still start with curiosity, and so on. If I were doing rapid state shifting with a girl I just met I'd likely have turned it from a cold approach into a warm approach first. Which all that would entail would be some seeding earlier in the night (meeting people without really gaming, getting in with other members of her group to reduce cock blocking later, and just being seen as a social guy to build up some social proof).

Then later as a warm approach (I'd already met her briefly) I reopen with either transference (which would be something as simple as walking up to her when she's eating some greasy post-bar food and asking "Is it good?" (The positive state she is in from eating the food transfers to you (as opposed to say a negative state of talking to her when she's impatiently waiting on a cab) or an opener that puts her in a state of curiosity. A state I typically follow up with is embarrassment. Nothing mean spirited mind you, just a little practical joke (as long as following up with the joke isn't going to negatively reinforce a positive state).

Now, if you've ever been in a social situation around friends and your friends like the person who played a joke on you they are likely to get in on it too. It's a pure state where when you are the one experiencing that state you aren't thinking of anything not related things. This is where you can absolutely mess things up. You can't leave her in a non-favorable state for very long at all. It can shift active disinterest to actual disinterest. If you leave her in such a state she'll really think you're not interested and truly making fun of her. Her friends might actually jump in and things can get out of control. BUT if you shift her state into one of comfort and acceptance it creates a swing that is just as strong in the other direction. Even though she is gullible (you got her to fall for your little joke) it's okay, you still like her.

It accomplishes the same thing as a neg, but is basically the polar opposite. I suppose if anything it is similar to the push-pull. Often I'll refer to it as 4th Grader or Grade School game because it manifests interest in a counter intuitive way. Take for example a couple of kids on the playground where one likes the other. What is a common way that they show their interest? One slugs the other in the arm and runs off. What I'm talking about is the same thing, albeit a more socially acceptable form, that is evened out in the moment with an adult understanding of what is really going on.

Going from one state to the next only takes a matter of seconds and is much more economical than memorizing a drawn out opener that follows up with some DHV story.
Author:  AJ25 [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Any sources for where something like this is explained more elaborately?
Yes.
Please.. reveal them.
Author:  YouWish99 [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Please.. reveal them.
You're going to have to take that one up with the moderators. At the moment 60 Years of Challenge seems to be the popular thing around here. From what I understand it is heavier on the sexual tension end of the scale.
Author:  AJ25 [ Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for that. Your posts a v.enlightening btw.
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