PUA Forum
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

How Doing Stupid Shit is Good for You
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=128529		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Monkey [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 10:13 am ]
Post subject:  How Doing Stupid Shit is Good for You
I posted this on Facebook, but I figured the good folk of PUAF could make use of it, too.

I have a buddy who is afraid that he’s deep like a baking pan. His most recent interaction with the ladies has left him feeling that he’s uninteresting and that what you see on his outside is what you get on the inside. I don’t really think that’s true, but I did decide to share with him some of what I think makes a person interesting, and now I’ve decided to share it with all of you.

People are made interesting by doing stuff. Usually, the most interesting stuff you’ve done is the stupid stuff. If you want to surprise other people, you need to surprise yourself, and that often means taking a risk or doing something that you would normally never do. I seem interesting to a lot of people because I’ve done a lot of different things in my life: I’ve been homeless; I made a lot of money selling timeshare; I sold puppies for a while; I’ve attempted suicide a bunch of times; I made pitas professionally; I’ve been a baker, a dishwasher, a cook. And sometimes, I do really weird shit. I learned to pick up girls in my mid-twenties from a book and some practice. I became polyamorous, which was a strange choice for me because I’m obviously pretty bad at it. Hell, the only reason I’m in Edmonton at all is because I followed a girl here, and that ended in flames and nastiness.

But all of these things have gathered together to create a life story that is diverse and sort of weird. If you want to be interesting, sometimes you have to do really stupid shit. In fact, you should probably _consistently_ do really stupid shit for a while.

When you’re young, you have a license to do the stupid. I mean this as much as I can mean anything: when you are young, you are supposed to do really stupid things. It’s how we learn, it’s how we grow, and when we’re establishing ourselves as people in our late teens and early twenties, it’s really important to fail at a bunch of stuff. And let’s face it, we don’t want to fail at the important stuff. We want to fail at stuff that doesn’t matter, and that usually means doing something stupid, failing at it, and then finding some other stupid thing to do. Some, like me, take it to a strange extreme where they do a lot of really important stupid shit, but I’m not suggesting that you need to take it that far. Just be willing to experiment and try things you haven’t done before.

I mean, think about all of the boring people you know. Everyone knows some boring people. How many cool stories can they tell you about that time they jumped off the hay bale and gave a flying elbow to a cop car? None. Because they’ve played it safe, and they haven’t done anything that’s really worth doing. They haven’t taken stupid risks, they’ve never lost everything, they’ve never really gained anything, and they’re just sitting around waiting for the world to happen to them.

And here’s the big thing, here’s the kicker: Doing these stupid things reveals your character, tells you who you are. It provides depth to your character. You don’t become interesting just because you punched a hobo to death at terminal velocity that one time. You become interesting because of what that says about who you are. You are a different person because of that event than you would have been without having experienced it.

And I’m not saying you have to do stuff that’s totally balls-to-the-wall-stupid. Just… Take risks. Do things you wouldn’t do. Test yourself against the world and see what impressions the world leaves on your soul. Move out. Change the way you dress for six months. Get a different job, something that’s totally unrelated to what you know. Talk to strangers. Experiment, do the dumb, take risks, and learn.
Author:  JHA91 [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 11:22 am ]
Post subject: 
I can completely vouch for this: I'm a saltaholic who gets drunk, climbs over fences to get back home (then finds I'm in the wrong place), talk to strangers, chat up girls in bars, crashed a scooter into the back of a lorry when I was young and in a different country and a whole bunch of other stuff I'm not gonna talk about so as to maintain my anonymity. I'm also the only guy I know who drinks straights or eats hash rather than smoke it and I don't bother with space cakes, monster cookies or 'green tea' either. I also have different personalities that I convey to the rest of the world as I feel like it. I've been kicked out a club, fallen over giving someone a drunken piggy back, giving myself a nasty gash on my hand then tried to stop an infection by repeatedly burning my hand with a lighter (DON'T DO THAT - I still have the scars!!!) and I've already screwed up a lot of things in life/ruined perfect opportunities. If only I could figure out a way in which to convey all the stupid stuff I've done to other people :lol: I kinda do so in a way, but it can come across as bragging.
Author:  CaliForniCatioN [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 12:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I can completely vouch for this: I'm a saltaholic who gets drunk, climbs over fences to get back home (then finds I'm in the wrong place), talk to strangers, chat up girls in bars, crashed a scooter into the back of a lorry when I was young and in a different country and a whole bunch of other stuff I'm not gonna talk about so as to maintain my anonymity. I'm also the only guy I know who drinks straights or eats hash rather than smoke it and I don't bother with space cakes, monster cookies or 'green tea' either. I also have different personalities that I convey to the rest of the world as I feel like it. I've been kicked out a club, fallen over giving someone a drunken piggy back, giving myself a nasty gash on my hand then tried to stop an infection by repeatedly burning my hand with a lighter (DON'T DO THAT - I still have the scars!!!) and I've already screwed up a lot of things in life/ruined perfect opportunities. If only I could figure out a way in which to convey all the stupid stuff I've done to other people :lol: I kinda do so in a way, but it can come across as bragging.
haha :lol:
as weird as it may sound...i want to find myself more oftenly iN these exect situations LOL :D
Author:  zebraG [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 1:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
I've got at something along these lines several times in the past, but I've never quite managed to express myself clearly. Here's attempt number 12:

Can you not gain X% of the credit from these stories by retelling them in the 3rd person?

Or to put it another way (no. 13):

The dude who's good at telling all the stories about all the crazy things that his 'friends' have done, how much less cool is he that the guy who's actually done them?
Author:  JHA91 [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 7:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
haha :lol:
as weird as it may sound...i want to find myself more oftenly iN these exect situations LOL :D
I still don't think I've done nearly enough crazy things. I need to think what it is I'm going to do next :D Then I need to figure out how it will help me get laid :lol:
Author:  TygaNasty [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 8:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Doing stupid stuff boosts my confidence. It's the only way I can lower my AA. I wasn't opening anyone the other night at the bar until I stood in the middle of the dance floor... and started bunny hopping in a circle around myself. Then I started opening.
Author:  CaliForniCatioN [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 10:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
haha :lol:
as weird as it may sound...i want to find myself more oftenly iN these exect situations LOL :D
I still don't think I've done nearly enough crazy things. I need to think what it is I'm going to do next :D Then I need to figure out how it will help me get laid :lol:
LOL :lol: what a charming life you lead 8)
please post what you decided to do...
Author:  Monkey [ Mon Feb 13, 2012 8:14 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
The dude who's good at telling all the stories about all the crazy things that his 'friends' have done, how much less cool is he that the guy who's actually done them?
100% less cool.
Author:  SmoothOp [ Mon Feb 13, 2012 2:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
This creates personality depth. If you have a balance between crazy party animal and cool professional, people will be attracted to you.

I wear a suit to work everyday and get shit faced on the weekend. I go to meetings with millionaires and get thrown out of clubs. I like to read books and I bungee jump. I'm an engineer and have a criminal record(really gay).

Having interesting stories and breaking stereotypes people have makes you an individual, which makes you a interesting person. Stupid shit rocks but must be mixed with some professionlism.

The drunk idiot college student who drops out of school because he drinks and picks fights might have cool stories, but he is still a joke. I think cool stories add character depth and thats the key here.
Author:  TygaNasty [ Tue Feb 14, 2012 10:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Just be careful when you do stupid shit. (Like when a lot of you are wasted) If you're a guy, you can really get fucked up.
Author:  zebraG [ Thu Feb 16, 2012 7:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
The dude who's good at telling all the stories about all the crazy things that his 'friends' have done, how much less cool is he than the guy who's actually done them?
100% less cool.
You've never seen the dude with all the cool stories with a group of people gathered around him? He's clearly got, at least, a little cool.
Author:  Deadeyexx [ Thu Feb 16, 2012 9:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
The dude who's good at telling all the stories about all the crazy things that his 'friends' have done, how much less cool is he than the guy who's actually done them?
100% less cool.
You've never seen the dude with all the cool stories with a group of people gathered around him? He's clearly got, at least, a little cool.
I find this doesn't have much to do with the cool shit he's done. But rather how much people like him to begin with. It's just giving value to the person of high status.

Even if you do have a lot of cool stories. Nobody has enough to build an entire social life around telling them.
Author:  maleaco [ Fri Feb 17, 2012 3:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Any story is good as long as it conveys EMOTION Image
Author:  zebraG [ Fri Feb 17, 2012 12:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
You've never seen the dude with all the cool stories with a group of people gathered around him? He's clearly got, at least, a little cool.
I find this doesn't have much to do with the cool shit he's done. But rather how much people like him to begin with. It's just giving value to the person of high status.

Even if you do have a lot of cool stories. Nobody has enough to build an entire social life around telling them.
I'm not suggesting that you can build your entire social life around that, what I'm interested in is how to obtain maximum possible value from others stories on the occasion when you do use them.

In jokes, for example, you're 'allowed' to convert the story to first person even if it happened to someone else as everyone accepts that the story goes better.
Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/