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The problem with 90% of PU advice...
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=117709		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Munroe (MUNROE) [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 1:14 pm ]
Post subject:  The problem with 90% of PU advice...
...is that its about as helpful as this picture.

Image

In most cases, simply telling someone to "Stop being a pussy", "Be confident bro", or "Don't use a canned opener, just say 'hi'" isn't going to help them.

PUAs love giving general advice, while paying little or no regard to a person's specific needs, wants, age, location, physical characteristics, financial situation, logistics, social standing, or natural personality.

To offer truly meaningful PU help, you have to take the time to get to know a person, and then provide them with specific and concrete suggestions.
Author:  SunnySider [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 1:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
So don't offer advice unless you have a deep and meaningful understanding of the situation......???
Quote:
To offer truly meaningful PU help, you have to take the time to get to know a person, and then provide them with specific and concrete suggestions.
I fail to understand how to do this on a forum.......

I come here for peoples opinions.....And I appreciate all of them.....even when they are unhelpful, left of centre, unkind or in this case very simple opinions......They are perspective.....

I understand
Quote:
In most cases, simply telling someone to "Stop being a pussy", "Be confident bro", or "Don't use a canned opener, just say 'hi'" isn't going to help them
And agree, however

It takes all sorts to make the world .....
Author:  sPd13 [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The problem with 90% of PU advice...
Quote:
.
In most cases, simply telling someone to "Stop being a pussy", "Be confident bro", or "Don't use a canned opener, just say 'hi'" isn't going to help them.
In some cases this is enough because that person knows that that needs to be done but needs someone to confirm that.
In other cases that might not be enough but how can you know all the details when all most all the problems are something like "i like the girl x, i think she likes me back and I want her...".
To be able to help more you need more details, but if you make a post of a shitload of lines or stuff like (she said/ I said) then I don't think anyone will read it.

Think if 100 guys come a day with very long stories where they need help , can you handle all of them and get to know each situation in each case?
Author:  Diego1234567 [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 2:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
you forgot to mention 90% of the advice is miscalibrated too :)

People say stuff like "assume attraction!" "dont use material" but unless you are extremely experienced then those 2 bits of advice are on par with "believe broooo!!"
Author:  pumpington [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 2:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
god I love this thread and that owl picture, you have a great point, but sometimes people need to just be told,

HEY DRAW THE DAMN FUCKING CIRCLES ALREADY,

and that was the push they needed to start to practice drawing
Author:  Stand Up [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 3:13 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
you forgot to mention 90% of the advice is miscalibrated too :)

People say stuff like "assume attraction!" "dont use material" but unless you are extremely experienced then those 2 bits of advice are on par with "believe broooo!!"
extremely experienced? I don't think you have to be experienced at all to open with nothing planned. That's what 90% of guys are doing. most guys don't know about or aren't invested in the community, they still get laid.
Author:  P-Style [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The problem with 90% of PU advice...
Quote:
Image
LOL.

But yeah, it would be better for the threadstarters to ask their questions to a skilled person IRL. But as they post it here, we can only reply to what we read.
And it's also often the case it all comes down to:
1. Yeah rejection sucks, it hurts like hell but man the fuck up because you will be shot down numberous of times.
2. Don't overthink it and just go and say hi.
3. No it's not smart for someone unexperencied to hit on someone in your immediate circle.
4. Don't do drugs.
5. Rock out with your cock out because it turns chicks on.

If someone has a specific problem, the responses are often straight to the point.
Author:  JSmooth [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well a lot of the advise doesn't have to be individualized to the person because it's a basic thing they need to do, or a concept they need to grasp. Take oneitis for example. I can't tell you how many damn oneitis posts I've read on this forum since 2007, probably about as many as posts I've written. Anyways... there are sometimes special circumstances in that regard but 90+% of the time it ends up being the same basic advise.

I applaud the individuals that take the time to really consider the persons situation and personalize it. If it's complex I try to consider the person the best I can in the situation, but at times it's pretty cut and dry.

As a person who helped teach this stuff the general advise is about the best you can expect from someone who is not really vested in them succeeding. Also, there is a good bit it's better to learn how to do on your own.

To be honest its in my best interest not to help you succeed. For all I know that you I'm competing against in the club or bar I frequent.

The pickup scene is not a "community" as much as we call it that. We're all here because we as individuals wanted to get better. Now since we as individuals wanted to get better we want our needs met. But once that is done most people could care less about random new AFC #3,500 who just joined the forum and asking the same general questions.

Although, there are some people on this forum including myself that try to make a difference when we can, is does get taxing.
Author:  Prophet'sOracle [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 7:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
Best fucking thread I've seen so far. Seriously, guy who wrote this expresses the opinion of many in this community. This is what I was hammering other posters about, especially in their threads. Put more detail into it and people would stop asking you retarded questions. IT's really that simple.
Author:  Ezo [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 7:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
To the OP:

Yes, you are right. There are a lot of people who just say random stuff that wont help at all. Like man up and just be yourself. That is BS.

But, there are people who try to help, to really see what you are doing wrong and improve your performance.

However, it all depends on how you ask for help. I see a lot of people asking things like "I am confused, she sends mixed signals" and that is their question. How could anyone help with that amount of information?

Or "I got drunk and misbehaved, what should I do and dont tell me to drink less." Yes, what do you want us to say about this? Duh?

But my all time favourite is when someone writes a post and expects others to do the work for him. Like "Hi, I suck. What do I do wrong?"

There is a reason why so many posts have no replies... There is nothing to say about them. There is no way to help, so the more experienced guys dont even try and you only get responses like "Man up" from some boy living in his mothers cellar with his pet snake and a poster of Twilight vampires.
Author:  magnum45 [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 10:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
It's important to stay positive even if the advice given to you hurts you. You can only learn from your mistakes. You have to take accountability for your own life and your own actions. You can't blame the people that gave you bad advice or not enough advice. You have only one choice, stay positive or die trying.

-Magnum
Author:  axtion [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 10:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
When it comes down to it, this forum is for putting people in the right direction. Being on the forum alone will not make you good. But being on the forum and going out and finding what works and what doesn't well.

Like the picture. You can tell someone how to start, but then they need to practice on how to draw. Same with pick up. It's ABOUT THE DOING.
Author:  skills360 [ Wed Oct 12, 2011 10:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ask khumar, that is the best advise...lol... That is why when i give advise, 99% of the time i tell them to get specific books...

Second problem some puas are stronger in specific games than others

Third problem people try to make the personality fit the game instead of the other way around(got that line from dj z)

Best advise ask khumar lmao!
Author:  kasabi [ Thu Oct 13, 2011 12:22 am ]
Post subject: 
This has less to do with pu and more to do with the fact that people simply tend to communicate to others as if they were communicating with themselves. They say what they 'think' they would like or not like to hear. Break through this and your communication abilities + ability to influence others . . . and of course PU abilities will improve.
Author:  Deadeyexx [ Thu Oct 13, 2011 12:43 am ]
Post subject: 
I like your analogy. But it's true, there isn't much to learn instruction book-wise. Even if the instructions had 50 more steps, it wouldn't make someone a good owl drawer who didn't put pencil to paper. In fact, many guys would get lazy and want to find a faster way to learn how to draw owls.

Most of what you'd need to know comes from experience by training your hands, brain, and artistic vision to flow together. Like with pick-up, there's not fast and simple way to make that happen.
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