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First "lay" - couldn't get it up! Any advice?
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Author:  Ninja1992 [ Wed Jun 27, 2012 7:14 pm ]
Post subject:  First "lay" - couldn't get it up! Any advice?
So this was my first 'lay' on Monday, but there was

I'd organised a date in Manchester with a girl from Huddersfield I number-closed in a club.

The day before I messaged her to recap what was happening - couple of drinks in a chilled bar and then early night at mine (she has sleep insomnia, so yeah...)

She asked playfully about the 'early night' bit, so I decided to disarm the sexual nature of coming back to mine, ie: "you're working tomorrow, I have things to organise with band in the morning, etc..."

Then she asked if it was an 'adult sleepover', so I teased her saying "We'll see how things play out ;)".....her response being that she wanted it to be that way. Definitely DTF, will definitely end with sex :D

So the date went fine, I felt very relaxed and comfortable with myself. I alternated between social, friendly small talk and being more physical and sexual with her, like a form of push/pull. I was already able to establish that she was interested in a casual relationship over the holidays - a playmate!

So we went back to mine, I decided to get her more horny on the bus with more aggressive kissing, talking about sexual topics, bolder KINO, etc...

We got to ours and things really off. But even as I was there receiving a BJ, staring deep and seductively into her eyes, fingering her, penetrating her with the tip; I could not get hard!

I enjoyed the experience, but I feel more disappointment about not being able to perform, especially since was incredibly verbal - she must have begged me to put it in her at least 6 times, and I just couldn't! :(

So then I fingered her to orgasm, tried again in the morning with no success...either way I've established a casual relationship with her which is brilliant for me :)

But I'm concerned about not being able to get hard. I'm starting to think it might be to do with frequent masturbation, but I also didn't really 'in heat' - instead I felt indifferent, like really relaxed whilst her mind was racing. I know my competence since picking up PUA has come on in leap and bounds, but that's kind of disturbing for a virgin to feel that way...


What is your take on this?

Cheers,
Ninja
Author:  Danymite [ Wed Jun 27, 2012 8:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
How much alcohol did you drink? Were you nervous? Also, are you sensitive to porn and always looking for more extreme videos?

Those 3 factors add up. Don't drink excessive amounts of alcohol, don't masturbate for at least 12 hours before having sexy time and don't watch porn (ever).
Author:  Chicoman69 [ Thu Jun 28, 2012 12:19 am ]
Post subject: 
"I enjoyed the experience, but I feel more disappointment about not being able to perform, especially since was incredibly verbal - she must have begged me to put it in her at least 6 times, and I just couldn't!"

Dude... you pissed her off. She "begged" you for dick inside her and you didn't deliver. The first time is usually a bit harder than other times, so I wouldn't beat yourself up too much. Like the last poster said, cut down on your alcohol/drug consumption and stop wanking so much to the point where you are flaccid around cute/hot girls. Cigarettes can also make your boner limp.

Another way to view this is maybe you were not attracted to this girl enough to fuck her. She herself might have been new at making dicks stiff. All I know is, don't expect her to come crawling back to you after 6 unsuccessful tries. Most likely, you will have to find another girl outside of that same social circle. Girls communicate this to each other:

Girlfriend of girl you slept with - "How was he in bed?"
Girl - "well... he had a nice size dick but it stayed Mr. Floppy the entire time."
GF - "Did you give him a blowjob?"
Girl - "yes, and he was still flaccid... he must not like me at all" *CRIES*

You probably blew your chance with her, unless she is really young. Just to recap:

1. Avoid alcohol/cigarettes (and other drugs)
2. Don't wank it if you have a girl you are about to have sex with
3. Enjoy the girl's presence so much your dick naturally gets stiff
Author:  NikAFC [ Thu Jun 28, 2012 1:33 am ]
Post subject: 
You were just nervous man. Don't worry about it and carry on gaming. It's nothing to do with mastrubation.

You just didn't have the experience and when you actually closed because you didn't have the experience of having a girl sucking your cock or seing her naked at your place that frequently your mind reacted in a way that's a bit offputting but don't worry. It's normal. I've had it everyone had it.

Because the way you were gaming her she didn't expected that to happen she wasn't able to react to the situation either. In my case the girl knew cause I told her and she was able to let me relax. It's very important before sex for the girl to be relaxed but for you too. Don't think too much about it. Just caress the girl enjoy the moment that's it.

No one can really help you here you just wanna carry on gaming like it didn't happen.
Next time Just Bang that pussy :)
Author:  Ninja1992 [ Thu Jun 28, 2012 2:40 am ]
Post subject: 
Don't get me wrong Chicoman, I did try - I would be mad not to - but still quite difficult to penetrate seeing as I only had a semi, only got like halfway in.

She's also slept with about 23 guys now, so there's no way she's not used to pleasing them - but she hasn't been in a casual/fuckbuddy relationship with men.

I know that I haven't pissed her off - she's still texting me of her own accord and still wants to see me again. What's more, we still both like each other

I should probably add that I don't drink - there's no way alcohol could have come into the equation.

I do think it's to do with masturbation (and porn for that matter), I'd jacked off earlier that day before sex thinking I wouldn't last :( sucks lol
Author:  Oldskool8726 [ Thu Jun 28, 2012 2:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Its nerves buddy dont worry about it. As soon as a girls begs for it then it triggers something and then it seems to be more pressure on yourself and you find it alot harder to go hard, knowing that she is wet and asking you for it is a turn on!!! But when shes demanding it and your having trouble getting it up in the first place - really hard 2 go hard... Haha

Happend to me a few times, i tell her to shut up playfully.. and rub me balls, then jus close my eyes and think of sex. then once its up ITS NOT GOING DOWN!

All-in-all great work. Done everything good. Well played!
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