Hi guys, I just wanted to share my self-development story with the forum.
Here it goes:
I was so insecure, I am not tall 5.7. I thought I was ugly, I have a big nose, not a masculine jaw or anything like that, I am a middle eastern in a Scandinavian country. I am a bit hairy, though I have always groomed myself to look my best, dress my best. I used to smoke a lot of weed so I was really paranoid and insecure. My anxiety was sick! I would get insecure when people laughed, even though they didn't laugh about me I would think they did. At the age of 20 I had only been with 2 women. 1 prostitute and one not so good looking girl.I didn't think I could change, I just thought some people are born with it and some are not and by that I mean wealth and looks. I have always been open minded though, and it is because of that I finally started to change when I found some random PUA advertising about how to get the girl in 5 steps or some shit like that. This was 2 years ago. I joined the army 6 months later and that was when I started to put myself out of my comfort zone. I kept reading pua stuff(mostly RSD and inner game), tried it out and used the mind sets everywhere. I failed miserably, but some times it actually worked. The first six months I almost had no results. Only thing I would see was IoIs from some girls, but as soon as I opened my mouth I got friend zoned and they could see through my insecurities. In the end of my service(12 months) things started to get better. I was a lot more comfortable around guys now and because of that I became friends with some of the popular guys in our base and some of these were SICK alpha males.My roommate for example had banged like 50% of the girls in our troop in our room, sometimes even when we were there sleeping in the bed next to him. He just didn't give a fuck about anything. I remember him running naked and slapping his coworker(a girl) with his penis and everyone was laughing. This other guys was just the typical alpha male, he was built handsome(no homo) and the leader of every men there and he had an aura about him that I had never ever seen before, it was crazy. They were both naturals as far as I know. I guess I was a bit lucky being surrounded by these type of people. Through this social circle I started getting to know the girls there and I manned up and said to myself, this is it. Throughout the entire time in the army I had been trying flirting with girls and already gotten some results, no kiss closes or anything but mostly better reaction from girls, but also a lot of rejection and friend-zoning stuff. I suddenly got some great results and i got flirting with females in the army who was pretty good looking 6-8s. And even the ugly ones. Sometimes the girls would call me hunk and stud and sometime I even got called a creep and gay and stuff like that. Experiences like that boosted my inner game. After failing so much and putting myself in situations where I would feel really bad I started analyzing it differently. Now 2 years later I have been with 3 more women.7-9's. And girls I meet and hang with love me and are attracted to me. I am a completely different guy. I see myself as good looking, funny, crazy and lots of confidence. And I'm improving every single day I go out. I get excited when I think of myself in the future, cause I know I will just improve so much more even though I'm pretty much awesome as I am now
I am soooo happy I found PUA and sooo fucking proud of myself you wouldn't even believe it. I just got a part time job as a "salesman". I walk around and approach random people on the street and i get rejected like 70% of the time and you wont believe the looks people give me, which is really normal for salesmen. I just don't give a fuck anymore what anybody thinks of me, cause I know that their meanings mean NOTHING. I could have girls in a circle around me yelling at me and telling me I'm ugly, short, stupid, looser, etc. And I wouldn't give a fuck, cause I know I'm the shit. It's not fake confidence and It's REAL. But If something like that would happen to me two years ago I would seriously be fucking traumatized for LIFE! If you really believe you are good looking, and I mean really believe it, you will become good looking. I know the process is not easy, It is realllly hard. Especially if you are a hard case, but I don't regret any of it. No matter how short or "ugly" you are. Look at tyler from rsd, you don't need anymore facts than that. That guy is a BEAST!And also NEVER compare your looks to any guy in the world, nothing good will come of it.
It takes pain, rejection, joy, but the pain eventually goes away and you will be left with less pain and more joy. I am proud to be among the 1% of males out there who have this mindset.
I'm not saying this to brag or anything I just thought I would give people some motivation.
I wish everyone the best of luck becoming an alpha male!
-Improver