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Where am I going wrong?
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=120391		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Flyin' High [ Fri Nov 11, 2011 8:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Where am I going wrong?
Hi everyone :D

I just joined the community, but I have been surfing this forum for quite a long time. I recently finished reading The game by Neil Strauss. So, I have been doing approaches. My approach anxiety is low. But my game is weak. I can go up to a woman and have small talk. I usually rely on situational openers (they always giggle LOL). The problem with me is continuing conversation and making her feel attracted. Also, I haven't practiced KINO either. Btw, I am 20.

Areas to improve:
- Conversation skills
- Attraction
- Kino

I would appreciate any help/guidance on how I can go about to improve it.
Author:  AmazingArt [ Fri Nov 11, 2011 9:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Wrong???
I don't think your going wrong anywhere. All your missing is experience. So keep on practicing and you'll be a pro. Just to point out, most guys always think that if something didn't work out with the girl the problem is within them. While in some cases that might be true in most cases they just lack the experience. So my suggestion for you is, keep on practicing and you'll be good.
Author:  Flyin' High [ Sat Nov 12, 2011 1:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Wrong???
Quote:
I don't think your going wrong anywhere. All your missing is experience. So keep on practicing and you'll be a pro. Just to point out, most guys always think that if something didn't work out with the girl the problem is within them. While in some cases that might be true in most cases they just lack the experience. So my suggestion for you is, keep on practicing and you'll be good.
Thanks Amazing Art!

I agree with you, practice makes man perfect. I would like to set goals and attempt to achieve it. I have been doing approaches but have gotten nowhere. I number closed a couple girls, but haven't heard back from them. I'm not sure when to call back or leave a text message. I'd like to know if there is anything besides the book game that I can read to improve my conversation skill, or stay longer in the set. :)
Author:  AmazingArt [ Sat Nov 12, 2011 11:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Reading many books wont equal to actually having one conversation. You can read how much you want but it will only help if you actually go into the field. When you read books and go out you usually expect better results which usually does not happen and that drives one to say that it was his fault and the problem is with him. That's because you had high expectations. Some of my friends were real AFCs and never learned PUA but after I learned it myself I just suggested them to go out and game more girls and now all those guys are pretty good. They never read one book of PUA and they're still good. You know why? Because they expected the least and therefore when they saw even minimum results they were happy and that happy reaction keeps motivating them more and more. However if you learn and read too much you expect better results and if you don't receive these results it depresses you and makes your motivation decline. Look at the quote below this reply. Experience is the teacher of all things.
Author:  Slip n Slide [ Sun Nov 13, 2011 12:42 am ]
Post subject: 
If I could recommend one book, it would be The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It sums up the ideas of zen concisely. I recommend listening to it on tape (find a text removed by moderator for violation for forum rule 3 or something) rather than reading it. The zen state of focus is something you can practice anytime and anywhere, and it will help your game immensely.

It will not directly make you better with women. Only talking to women can do that.
Author:  Flyin' High [ Fri Nov 25, 2011 6:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
If I could recommend one book, it would be The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It sums up the ideas of zen concisely. I recommend listening to it on tape.. rather than reading it. The zen state of focus is something you can practice anytime and anywhere, and it will help your game immensely.


Thanks, already started listening to it.
Quote:

It will not directly make you better with women. Only talking to women can do that.
I agree with you. Many a times I feel I could have gone farther, but I close early as I tend to run out of things to talk about. Not sure how to go for this without seeming to be needy and wanting to talk.
Author:  Flyin' High [ Sat Dec 24, 2011 5:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Guys,

I have been gaming with two girls met on POF.
Haven't met with either of them on a date. I am seeing I am not interesting. One girl says so, now at least I know I am not interesting (to girls). I, on my end, feel I haven't been able to spark attraction and hold it. I feel this is my weakness.
I would appreciate if you give me advice/suggestion.

Happy Holidays.. :D
Author:  Slip n Slide [ Sat Dec 24, 2011 11:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Guys,

I have been gaming with two girls met on POF.
Haven't met with either of them on a date. I am seeing I am not interesting. One girl says so, now at least I know I am not interesting (to girls). I, on my end, feel I haven't been able to spark attraction and hold it. I feel this is my weakness.
I would appreciate if you give me advice/suggestion.

Happy Holidays.. :D
Don't know what POF is... Hope it's not online. If it's online, attraction building will probably not transfer the same way to real life interactions.

First, lower your standards for conversation. You don't need to be talking about anything interesting, or even talking at all, for a girl to like you. Too much talking shows nervousness, which can be cute, or a turn-off.

Next, focus on expressing a simple, calm sexuality. If I can capture this mentality, I get a close 90% of the time. If I can't be calmly sexual, I close maybe 10% of the time. This means holding her hand while talking about the weather, putting your hand around her waist for no reason, saying "I want you" through your body language, voice and attitude. This comes with practice, but don't lose sight of the goal.

Third, develop strong passions and opinions. Develop yourself, develop your hobbies, develop your spiritual and personal beliefs. This gives you great topics that you know well that you can always talk about.

When this comes together, you will one day realize you're curled up on a couch with a girl, touching familiarly, very calm, talking slowly about something you both care about. You haven't even thought about "making" her attracted to you, because you realize something important. THE ONLY PERSON YOU CAN CONTROL IS YOURSELF. You can't "make" her do anything, you can only express yourself fully.
Author:  Flyin' High [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 1:25 am ]
Post subject: 
Very logical advice there.. =)
POF is an online dating site (plenty of fish). I was too busy with my finals last month to actually to practice on field. But, I would like be able to do it anytime, anywhere.
Little background info about me:
I am a student and only place I can practice is campus. Although, I try to practice in my day to day interactions but it's not that frequent.
Plus, I don't go to bars or clubs. So, that is excluded from the list. I do have passion for space and planes, but I can always expand my hobbies and passions. You are right. I will practice with above points in mind. Thanks!
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