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I'm Scared Shitless- Need Some Confidence
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Author:  X_Factor360 [ Tue May 03, 2011 4:16 am ]
Post subject:  I'm Scared Shitless- Need Some Confidence
I do MMA in my spare time and I've jumped out of perfectly good planes but NONE of that compares to the anxiety I feel when dealing with woman. It's a shitty feeling.

I feel that I have a great personality and people like me but I can't be confident around women- most of them don't even believe I'm a virgin because I act so cocky (only because I feel sexually insecure). I try to give off the vibe that I'm a player so women won't know how inexperienced I am (I'm a virgin).

Whenever I find a woman who likes me I fuck it up- either by being too much of an asshole (again, insecurity) or by not making enough bold moves. For example, last night I had a girl who was REALLY into me in bed. We were cuddling and nothing ended up happening- fucking sucks.

Any advice would be awesome. Thanks.
Author:  Chicoman69 [ Tue May 03, 2011 9:28 am ]
Post subject: 
Whip out your penis and put her hand on it. She will know what to do. Great job getting in bed with a girl.
Author:  Tiger6Niner [ Wed May 04, 2011 9:28 am ]
Post subject: 
Who cares if you are a virgin. Some women find that hot and even have fantasies of taking away a guy virginitiy
Author:  kinorc [ Wed May 04, 2011 6:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
I can relate to what you are saying buddy. I was the same way when I was like 17. I played sports my entire life, but didn't figure out how to work women til much later. I would always come off too blunt n dickheadish not c&f. Anyways ill give you two main things to think about n work on that I guarantee will help u if u can do it (n I believe u can). Think about the feelings you get right before you are about to fight...your adrenaline starts pumping you start getting excited and your fight or flight response starts firing. This could make you want to run away, but instead you have trained yourself to choose fight n instead of becoming scared you becomes excited and more aware. If you pay attention to the feeling, there is no difference between nervousness and excitement. It is still that butterflies in the stomach adrenaline pumping, make you want to do SOMETHING feeling. The only difference is how you are interpretting the feeling. When it comes to women, you can learn to shift your mind, like u did with fighting, to view approaching and escalating the situation as a reason to become excited not nervous. The feeling will stay the same, but when you change your mindset, it will propell you forward, not hold you back. Next...when it comes to being concerned with sexual inadequacy, I wont go into techniques cause this is the inner game section (pm if your super concerned), but I can tell you some mental tricks. One, if you think about getting off you will. If you don't, you wont. It sounds simple, but it requires you to train yourself to NOT think about orgasm which is completely contradictory to societial conditioning of sex. Its about as much pleasure for as long as possible, not about running towards the finish line. Finally spend 30 minutes a day repeating to yourself "I am an amazing lover, and I fuck like a god". Repeat that to yourself for 30 minutes every single day. Lay down, relax, n think of nothing else but repeating that until it is automatically happening in your head. Do that daily, n when it becomes automatically being said in your head during your daily exercise, imagine yourself being with your perfect girl/s. Visualize and see yourself being an amazing lover, and fucking like a god! Keep doing that, n eventually it will stick in ur subconscious n you will have no other choice than to be that.

Very long post...I tried to lay down some techniques that I know work if truly worked at. Good luck and your welcome.
Author:  ladies_man969 [ Thu May 05, 2011 11:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
I don't remember the site I saw this, but on this one seduction site, the dude posted a video of himself doing a confidence building exercise. What he did was go up to random girls and ask them to touch his nipples. Most of them did.
I tried something kinda similar before I did the nipple thing, but not quite as awkward and a bit more easy to start. I have some muscle, (Not a lot, but enough that it's noticeable.) and so I asked random girls if they thought my bicep was big enough while I flexed. Most squeezed my bicep and all of them laughed at first, but it built my confidence with women enough that I could barely do the nipple thing. And then from there, I was able to talk to any girl I wanted confidently.
Author:  cygnus [ Fri May 06, 2011 12:03 am ]
Post subject: 
I don't recommend asking random women to squeeze your nipples. That's fucked.

If you're acting cocky but you are really insecure and virginal, imagine how much the women will laugh if they found out you were putting on an act all along. If you lose the arrogant attitude, maybe they will be more sympathetic to you.
Author:  Instincts [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 10:55 am ]
Post subject: 
I know what you mean. I am also a virgin ( 19 years now..) and it is realy ruining everything. I can kiss close without probs but when it comes to sex I fuck things up.

For example: A night not long ago I was out with my brother and his friends. We went to a club and I started dancing with a girl. We ended up making out on the dancefloor(I felt her out. She whispered in my ear that she was horny and wanted to leave the club).

We got out of the club and talked a little bit. She was a 22 year old college girl and she had an appartment not far from the club. She wanted to bring me there. So we started walking and then my head started to fuck things up for me. I got scared shitless thinking I would suck in bed.

so I bailed out..... And I hate myself for doing so now.
Author:  kinorc [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 3:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I know what you mean. I am also a virgin ( 19 years now..) and it is realy ruining everything. I can kiss close without probs but when it comes to sex I fuck things up.

For example: A night not long ago I was out with my brother and his friends. We went to a club and I started dancing with a girl. We ended up making out on the dancefloor(I felt her out. She whispered in my ear that she was horny and wanted to leave the club).

We got out of the club and talked a little bit. She was a 22 year old college girl and she had an appartment not far from the club. She wanted to bring me there. So we started walking and then my head started to fuck things up for me. I got scared shitless thinking I would suck in bed.

so I bailed out..... And I hate myself for doing so now.
practice makes perfect my friend. You need to get the first nut popped. How do you expect to get good at fucking if you arent doing it?? No issues tho...When I was a kid I would feel the same way. I lost mine at 17 n it was literally like 3 minutes of me fucking her. It was HORRIBLE and you know what...I didn't really give a shit lol Granted it was with a random n not someone I cared about so it made it easier, but ya it doesn't really matter dude. Just go ahead n pop that first one off. Pussy is incredible!!!, but you will build it up as some omg miraculous thing in your head before you have had any. After you start smashing, you will LOVE it...but realize what it is exactly. Hope this helps pz buddy.
Author:  cygnus [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 3:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
That girl you were dancing with is probably wondering if it was her fault you flaked. Kinorc is right - the first time isn't the greatest for most people. You've got to stop putting pressure on yourself.
Author:  TheBison [ Mon Jun 06, 2011 5:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
Still a virgin? Go watch a light porn or something, take notes, repeat what you see, be confident, and have a good time :)
Author:  tatu [ Mon Jun 06, 2011 7:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sounds like fear of intimacy. Go to a psychotherapist to explore that.

The best solution would be to find a sex surrogate (prostitute/therapist) that pops your cherry and teaches you how to be with a woman.

The third alternative is to become regular with a couple of young prostitutes. Don't be cheap. They have to be at least HB7. They aren't so understanding as surrogates, but maybe you can explain the situation. I warn you that it could be hard to convince them. They avoid hard work like everyone else.
Author:  I'm_Just_Me [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 9:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Age?
Could you tell us how old you are. (Please be honest!)
Author:  X_Factor360 [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 7:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
I am 21.
Author:  Bedflicker [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 10:17 am ]
Post subject: 
Mate, a lot of people are saying your first time will be shit. Fuck that! It can be awesome, instinct takes over and you can go wild my friend. Like everything else with pick up, don't think about it and it won't be an issue. Don't expect to be a god the first time (though you might be), just have fun, have a laugh at it if it gets awkward.
To be honest, sex is not as good as you think it is. You have it on a pedestal as this one moment where you are one with god, thE heavens open and your ball sweat can cure cancer. Instead it's more like a slightly more pleasurable version of running on a treadmill.

In the end, who cares if your shit at it, you can always find another girl who will love what you and your magic Johnson can do
Author:  Rod_Long [ Fri Sep 16, 2011 2:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sex is better than you think it will be. Your skills/stamina won't be good the first time (even if they're decent or good they can only get better), but it's going to be awesome--for you at least. :P

Do some research on technique and tactics. Focus on foreplay; try to get her off first (maybe more than once). Don’t be afraid to burry your head in her pussy try to suck and lick her clit. When you find something she likes, keep doing it exactly like that--don't increase intensity. She won't pay as much attention to how long you last and care even less, if you can get her off beforehand. Go slow, or at least don't be afraid to slow down for a little to help your stamina. You don't have to do puritan missionary sex, though. You can leave it in and grind against her clit, tease her (only go half in, pull it out and massage lips and clit), pull out slow and thrust in hard, do looong slooow thrusts (maybe go hard at the very end). Most men find they have better stamina when the woman is on top. Get creative, experiment and learn.

Enjoy yourself most of all. Let yourself go even if you do blow your load early, let it really go. Don't try to fight it and have a weak orgasm and dribble a little. Large ejaculates are a sign of health and virility (women actually find large cumshots attractive). She will also feel flattered that she turned you on so much. Remember sex is meaningless if the guy doesn't cum. Women are biologically programmed to make the guy cum. When they get turned on and they see you're close they will literally beg for it! Your cum is your gift to them and a reward for a job well done.

If you do cum early compliment her (“you’re so sexy, you fuck so good, I just had to cum”), playfully blame her (“you better not complain, you made me do that”) or get really c/f and say “well, thanks” and act like you’re going to leave in a serious hurry. LOL. No matter what don’t be apologetic, just own it, act like it says something good about her and not bad about you (and it does). Just go right back to foreplay. Women love foreplay and cuddling afterwards. Combine the two and wait to get hard again—you’ll last a lot longer. The average length of intercourse from penetration to ejaculation is 3 minutes!

Women are way more sexual than society wants us to think and they enjoy sex more than men. The clitoris is the only organ on either man or woman that has the sole purpose of pleasure--it has twice as many nerve-endings as the penis, in a much more compact area. Bottom line, sex is like any other part of the pick-up. Be Alpha, take charge, do it for your enjoyment, but also take care of her. Relax, have fun, you’ll be fine.
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