Arch stop fucking around and admit you're Hank Moody in the flesh!
OP, in my short bit of experience I've found that Arch's rules are very accurate.
The example I would give you is my previous girlfriend, the first 3/4 times I seen her it was in various hotel rooms that we both took turns paying. No dinner, no bullshit, drinks and back to the room asap. Separate ways the next morning and no contact from me til that evening at the very least provided she initiated. It was exciting, it was pretty fucking crazy and in between the texting was based around what she was gonna wear, sending me pics of her new purchases, what she'd like to try in bed etc.
Now I'm saying this because this is me in reflection, I lost my way somewhere, I knew all this and was naturally applying it unbeknownst to myself and that's what led me here after a sorry case of oneitis where I was the polar opposite man and had no clue... Arch has seen some of my posts,
But,
5th time we did this she started asking "what we were" etc, I deflected and delflected and deflected until she was in such a state she started crying and telling me she'd never experienced anything like what we had and she never knew where I was or if she'd see me again. Looking back I was again, unbeknownst to myself aloof, busy and made time for her when I could. Cancelling dates didn't give me a second thought if it was an issue and it drove her mad, however I stress that I had no idea I was doing it.
With regards to respect though OP, I can genuinely tell you that throughout this relationship she could not stress enough how much of a gentleman I was to her and that she could not wait to spend time with me.
Respect yourself and your time and you will earn respect from others.
Bren