Validation vs Satisfaction



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PostPosted: Sat Jan 02, 2016 8:27 am 
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I'm fairly sure tonight is the first time this has ever come up in my mind. I was standing there for hours and hours with dozens of hot girls roaming the bar and I said absolutely nothing to any of them, as normal. But right before closing it entered my mind, what the fuck do I want? Do I want to feel validated by some random woman, or do I want to feel GOOD? I can't explain the feeling, though I'm sure many have felt it before. Why do I avoid my gaze, not introduce myself, not interact at all with these girls when it's the ONLY thing that I want to do? I want to fuck these girls, I want to have meaningful interactions with them, I want to not stand there the entire night wishing that I COULD do what any 15 year old knows he can and talk to these girls. It's ripping my mind the fuck apart. I don't give a fuck if they want to talk to me, no girl wants to do anything until she's convinced she does. I want what I want, but I keep getting stuck not talking to the object of my desires. I don't give a fuck about being validated,
I want PUSSY! And as I realized that, I fucking talked to this chick at closing time, and realized I have no fucking idea what to say! Make statements, not questions, crack jokes according to your own personality, state your intentions clear and don't waver. Even with all the shit I read about, I'm drawing a blank when it comes down to crunch time. I'm not sure I even have a point other than I want my dick in their cunts, and that's the long and short of it. Fuck everything else, all this fucking worry over offending a chick just by talking to her. If they didn't want to be fucked, they wouldn't step outside their house and into a bar at 3am. I can't make sense out of this feeling, I just want to barrel through and forget it. I want my own satisfaction and nothing more. Anything else is driving me fucking nuts.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 02, 2016 12:55 pm 
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English Muffin
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Ignore the 'Seeking validation stuff' for the moment, for someone who is at the start of this journey, use this validation as motivation to hook up with girls. You need some fuel inside of you.

Scratch that itch and then perhaps consider NOT seek validation when you are further down the line and you're much more competent with women.

Stop letting the 'Seeking validation' subject fuck with your head, I see too many guys that sabotage themselves with this thinking. Me and this pick up dude once had 2 gorgeous girls ready to bang us, but he ruined it by saying he doesn't need the validation and that he only fucks 10's - nothing below a 10. I soon lost touch with after that. I am in a bar picking girls. Of course I would like to sex the girls I talk to. Not waste my time

But right now, scratch your itch. You're giving me misogynistic vibes and it is getting worse the more you go out.

I still think should stop being a cheap skate and you should hire a dating coach though. You don't seem to have any friends either. Stop being such a loner and get around people that are good with women.

You are letting theory prevent you from doing anything. Stop reading and get approaching for fuck sake, you've read enough.

I fucking hate this subject.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 1:22 am 
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Quote:
Ignore the 'Seeking validation stuff' for the moment, for someone who is at the start of this journey, use this validation as motivation to hook up with girls. You need some fuel inside of you.

Scratch that itch and then perhaps consider NOT seek validation when you are further down the line and you're much more competent with women.

Stop letting the 'Seeking validation' subject fuck with your head, I see too many guys that sabotage themselves with this thinking. Me and this pick up dude once had 2 gorgeous girls ready to bang us, but he ruined it by saying he doesn't need the validation and that he only fucks 10's - nothing below a 10. I soon lost touch with after that. I am in a bar picking girls. Of course I would like to sex the girls I talk to. Not waste my time

But right now, scratch your itch. You're giving me misogynistic vibes and it is getting worse the more you go out.

I still think should stop being a cheap skate and you should hire a dating coach though. You don't seem to have any friends either. Stop being such a loner and get around people that are good with women.

You are letting theory prevent you from doing anything. Stop reading and get approaching for fuck sake, you've read enough.

I fucking hate this subject.
I have friends, but yes you're right, I don't really have any friends. Guys that would do the wingman thing. I'm painfully aware of the false labels I use. I say I'm trying, but I'm not really trying, or else I would have relative success, I just think I'm putting forth effort a good enough effort when obviously I'm not. I've finished reading Models, I've stopped masturbating pretty much entirely, still continuing to go out, but yes the whole walk up to a girl and talk to her thing still makes me want to puke my guts out like so much stan marsh. A coach, as you described, seems like the only logical step forward, even though some people seem to think they're just a band-aid solution. That's where my next research will be focused on. And no god damn SPAM shit. It's either in person or nothing. Unless I'm being forced to do the one thing I want to do but won't, there's no point.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 1:30 am 
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English Muffin
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Get Googling bro

Bootcamps are cheaper and you will also meet some long term wingmen. That is what this forum for, it helps you connect with other like minded guys who are on the same journey. But a one on one will suffice, I am sure your instructor could connect you with some other students of his.

But I yet have yet to witness you to make any threads asking people if there is any body in your local area that wants to pick up girls with you and hold each other accountable. I have to say from my own experience, If I was totally alone at this pick up stuff, i'd give up a long time ago, I am sure of it. Friends are massive factor and you will have really deep moments and the most epic times with these fellow comrades. Osmosis is a massive weapon.

Come on man, get pro-active, meet some other people, lay down some money on the line and slam your balls on the table and take ahold of this problem of yours. Stop with the reading, stop with the mental masturbation.

I have gave you more than enough help since you've joined this forum and you still have yet to do a decent approach. If you cant do anything I have suggested, then perhaps this pick up stuff is not for you? You don't seem to want to help yourself....so this otherwise known as....a waste a time, especially mine.

'If it is to be, it is up to me'

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USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR REPEATEDLY IGNORING MOD WARNINGS AND MULTIPLE RULE VIOLATIONS


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 5:56 am 
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Giving up is not an option, no matter how pathetic my efforts are. Would be literal suicide. So I'll just have to do shit.


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