Quote:
I realized that I stay stuck because I feel guilty about sleeping with girls believing that 1) I don't think they are good enough for me to stick around anymore than just for dating 2) I know I'm going to leave them sooner or later after sex 3) Just sleeping with people and leaving them is using them and wrong.
It's like I want to "confess" all this to girl before sleeping with her, so that I am HONEST, but then I think no girl is going to want to sleep with me once I tell her my true inner intentions and thoughts. Like even girls I think are attractive, I tell myself I should tell her that I would never stay with her and that she isn't good enough for me because eventually I'm going to be rich and great and I only want the very best looking women so she only works for now.
So if you want to tell me to get over myself and check my ego yada yada that's fine, but really I would like feedback from anyone who has devoured these guilty feelings and is just able to sleep with as many women as he wants and feel fine about it.
It's not that I want to absolutely treat women like trash but I do think just being a player is using them and I feel incredibly guilty imagining that in my head, which I know is holding me back. I want to treat women well and date some of them for short periods of time and have amazing sex and companionship with them too, but always knowing that I know even before knowing them that I'm going to leave them gives me a huge feeling of guilt that I just haven't gotten past.
Any help to move past this limiting-beliefs/ feelings would be greatly appreciated.
Hi,
I'm glad that you've raised this issue of feeling guilty of having a raw sex with women that you don't intend to build any relationship with because this seemingly small issue could easily turn into a much bigger and more serious issue like sexual addiction accompanied with a mental disorder.
The latter issue all comes down to understanding that whenever you force yourself into doing something that you don't truly love and enjoy, you put yourself at the risk of becoming addicted to doing it beyond your control.
Since I've already posted quite a few posts on these forums where I've shared the main bits of my painful sexual addiction story that I hope you can also learn from, I suggest that you check them out by simply clicking on the links below:
a) The link to my reply to the post titled
"Being the guy you want to be VS being the guy you are."
b) The link to my post titled
"Feeling under unnecessary pressure when going out! Why?"
c) The link to my post titled
"Neurotic around women? 2 Reasons You Should Stop It Now!!"
Hope you find it helpful.
Bruno