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The general question that this post addresses is the psychological causes of the sadness, bitterness, and anger that I feel when my ex has sex with another guy before I'm able to completely eliminate my emotions for her. Here's a condensed version of the underlying story:
Before I met her, I was in abundance. I had 4 girls on rotation, I was not needy, I had sex available whenever I wanted it, and life was good. During this period of confidence, non-neediness, and sharp game, I met an exceptional girl. At first sight, I saw that she was stunningly beautiful. After taking her on an instant date to Starbucks, I found that she was smart and funny too. By the second date, I discovered that she was a virgin, for religious reasons, and she would normally never go on a date with a guy who did not share her religious beliefs, I was the first to break this barrier with her. She had one bf in the past, who shared her religion, and the most she ever did was give him a bj. At 23 years old, this girl was legitimately a virgin, smoking hot, smart, funny, charismatic, and cool. I had to make her my girl. I dropped the other girls from my harem, and focused exclusively on her (mistake #1- I lost abundance, I made myself dependent on her). About 9 months later, I started to act needy, and the dynamic of the relationship changed, in that we were no longer equals anymore, but I was constantly chasing her (mistake #2). This should have been a wake up call to think about game and female psychology and change my actions, but I was distracted by school and work, and I thought that I could just keep her and everything would be fine. Pretty soon, she dumped me. Here I am now, 3 weeks after initiating no contact (she wanted to be friends, I said no).
I saw a facebook post with a mutual friend of ours, where she said something very sexually suggestive to a guy. Logically, I know that I'm not the last dick she's going to ride (even though I was the first), and that I should make peace with the fact that she's going to fuck other guys. But on an emotional level, this is bothering me really badly, I feel angry, sad, and replaced.
I know that it will be easier once I evolve out of scarcity into abundance again, but since the breakup, I've only gotten laid twice, and it didn't make me feel better. I think that understanding the psychological reasons for why I feel this way emotionally, while knowing that it's wrong logically, may help.
I anticipate the response that I should avoid all contact, including facebook, but I attend school with this girl at a relatively small institution, so it would be impossible to cut her out completely. I'll still see her around fairly often, probably with guys, because she's one of the best looking girls in the university.
There's nothing to do but to just ride it out.
Realise that she's GOING to move on, and that it makes no sense to even think about her and any other guys because you two are no longer in a relationship.
It will hurt like fuck, but after a while the pain will become more and more bearable.