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| Overcoming Reactive-ness https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=101636 |
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| Author: | Royalty [ Thu Sep 15, 2011 5:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | Overcoming Reactive-ness |
I've spent some time away from the community and pickup in general in the past few months, which has been good for me in some ways, but I've definitely lost some of my edge. Lately what I've been noticing is that I've been reacting a lot to people around me -- not just girls, everyone -- feeling more serious, not as assertive, and not smiling or being as friendly as I was, feeling outcome-dependent -- about lots of different things. I'm re-reading Shambhala: The Sacred Path of the Warrior, and early on the author mentions a warrior's sense of humor, defined as having a "light touch" or light attitude toward things. Once I got to this part again, I realized that this is what I've been missing lately. Now the question is: How do I get it back? Just started a new job, been working out and playing music on the regular, and haven't been spending too much time with friends lately aside from bandmates. Much of my free time has been alone lately, and in the past, I relied heavily on social connections for my sense of well-being and confidence. What I want now to have that core sense of "everything is ok" on my own, and I think that's connected to killing the needy/reactive behavior. What do you guys think are some good ways to overcome a habit of acting needy and/or reactive? |
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| Author: | 1994 [ Sun Sep 25, 2011 10:19 pm ] |
| Post subject: | positive mindset! |
i think you should start viewing things from a positive mindset. Do some meditation maybe. Like try to be optimistic and hope to get the best out of the worst situation too. Do things that make you feel good and you know like get you into that zone like "YOUR THE MAN" you feel all energetic and happy. personally i never faced this dilemma so far yet so i don't know if i was able to relate to your problem correctly. ~1994 |
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| Author: | upnadam [ Mon Sep 26, 2011 10:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Definately understand where you're coming from man. Earlier this year I dropped off the map for a couple of months, to focus on study. A lot of my social time then was with my band, and I took leave from it during that period. So basically I had no social contact with the rest of the world. At the end of it I felt SO depressed. I went out to the mall with a mate and everything felt off. I felt really uncomfortable being around people, couldn't relax etc. People stated how conceited and serious I was being. Not good at all. What I've found nowadays is that the majority of my time is socialising. So when I'm alone, I actually feel down quicker then before. That sense of 'everything is ok' when alone for me comes from my passions - working out, running, playing/listening to music. I second the reply above - meditation is so boss for this sort of comfort with yourself. Cannot recommend it enough. And if you do feel down? Just think of the things that pump you up. Fun times with your mates, the results you're getting in life, that hilariously adorable puppy across the road. Whatever. Try the ten day positivity challenge. EDIT: Just realised this basically reiterated the above post. My bad |
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| Author: | flows101 [ Wed Sep 28, 2011 1:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Remember that the world is a VERY LIGHT place, and that everything will pass sooner or later so why make everything in to such a BIG DEAL. Learn acceptance, i could go on about such a subject forever but easier if you look up "eckhart tolle" on google. |
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