Tried TEASING and got called RUDE



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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2014 8:52 am 
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I'm in college and tonight a girl texted me that she wanted to drink. I was down, so I went over with some vodka and at some point took a really long pull from my bottle. I wasn't DRUNK to be honest. I was very slightly buzzed, but enough so that I would just TALK and let things flow out of my mouth.

I thought I was doing fine... I thought I was being a playful and a bit challenging up until the girl said her roommate wanted to go to sleep so I said it was fine, I was gonna go too. Later that night, my gay guy friend told me he talked to the girls and they said they just said that so I would leave because I was being RUDE.

It hit me that I was doing this all wrong. I don't neg... At least I say I don't. But maybe through reading so much "game," I might've started subconsciously negging.

One thing I remember saying tonight was something I said to one of the girls that has a really strong personality. I said exactly what I heard Mystery say once in an infield video. He said, "Wow, you have a really strong personality. Where did this come from? Did you get beaten as a child? Wait, don't answer that...."

Yeah... NOW I know how offensive that can be interpreted as... Maybe that could slide at a club with a girl you just met, but obviously not in college.

So I was just wondering if anyone could talk about the differences in "teasing" and being playful in a social circle scene as opposed to cold approach game?

I don't study mystery, in fact, I don't even study MM. But I've heard so much talk about him that I decided to check out his infield footage and that's where I got that line. I usually try to stick to natural game, I guess I still have a long way to go....


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2014 8:59 am 
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Also, should I just pretend this didn't happen and act normal tomorrow (we had plans to see each other... unless she doesn't want to anymore because of this) or should I text her something tomorrow to apologize or something?


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:32 am 
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Drop the negging and be normal.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:25 pm 
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i think you're trying too hard to neg. negging is part of it but ya gotta be a little bit more subtlle. in a low intensity setting like a college dorm room, what you said is kinda harsh. in a club where girls are out with their friends, are all dressed up and actin like hot shit, that might fly. see the difference?

i'm an AFC as well but what has been working for me pretty well lately is "push pull."

you: so you're an only child? i can tell you're pretty spoiled.
HB: hey wtf, i'm not spoiled!
you: so you're not an only child? *stay serious and play innocent*
HB: blah blah blah
you: haha awright. *slight pause* you're pretty chill, i like you.

slight/subtle negs or teasing and low key compliments back and forth. keep doin it, keep messin with em. what's important here is to recognize the balance. pay very close attention to how she is reacting. can't neg em too hard or compliment them too much. just enough to keep them guessing if you're an asshole or a nice guy. i did this a few weeks ago and by the end of the night the girl was completely opening up to me, telling me life stories, letting me put her arm around her, i wasn't even push pulling anymore. the girl had a bf btw. anyway i didn't get my dick wet but that's still a work in progress, or should i should say i am. ;)

also next time you decide to swig it, take half a long pull. ;)


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:40 pm 
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Quote:
Also, should I just pretend this didn't happen and act normal tomorrow (we had plans to see each other... unless she doesn't want to anymore because of this) or should I text her something tomorrow to apologize or something?
no need to apologize. act normal. if she brings it off just play it off unapologetically. "hey my bad, i was just fuckin with you." then change subject and try to lighten the mood. joke maybe? if she buys it, back to the good ol' push pull. ;) that's what i'd try and do at least. if she doesn't buy it, come back to the forum and ask a more senior member haha. i'm over my head on that.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 20, 2014 7:18 pm 
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In a college situation the I've found the best negs are just to call women average. In a normal manner say some characteristic of them seems normal or average. This drives colleges girls absolutely nuts, because theyre all trying to be unique or be more fun than the other girls around them.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 20, 2014 7:48 pm 
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For the mystery style negs, the point of the neg is to grab attention to break passed the hook and into rapport, if a girl actually wants to talk to you, then you have her seeking rapport already, there is no point in negging her, especially with a bold neg that skirts the line

I think mystery's lines are kind of corny but that line you used sounds like that would be something you would just say to someone who was being standoffish

if you create a negative frame, try to re-frame immediately, so if it ends with ''wait don't answer that'' keep your mouth moving, and have the next thing that comes out of it moving far away from what was just said, keep them distracted


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 21, 2014 10:53 pm 
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I was on a dating site, and made a remark about a HB's dress size (she was bragging about being slim), I told her she had strong arms for a girl,teasing, teasing, asked if she worked in a warehouse maybe? She got quite offended and called me rude.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 28, 2014 1:21 pm 
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I don't know, one girl I know, its like her word. And the sexiest thing is to own it.

"I am so rude. Now sit on my lap"

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 12:09 am 
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"Wow, you have a really strong personality. Where did this come from? Did you get beaten as a child? Wait, don't answer that...."
yeah dont ever say that again

but you can find out threw her qualifying herself on her own

chalk it up as a learning experience

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 01, 2015 11:56 pm 
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hey man!
calibration is a great thing! (:
It's great you learned, even if it is after the fact.
I believe that as you become more relaxed in that kind of situations you will learn to calibrate while there, and after even start calibrating -before-.
that being said, even if you will feel extremely relaxed, some situations you won't be able to calibrate-not while and sure not before...

regarding your question-im looking at this differently than you. we are so used to "game" that we find it hard to do what normal people do sometimes in social interactions-just chill!
in social interactions, and also in this one, you are already "Accepted" ! the group already knows you-a warm approach as you may call it.
all you need to do is be chill and move the interaction forward. don't use your words, use your actions.

try to take the girl with you to a different place in the house(" move her around") as fast as you can. smile as much as you can. talk to her about normal things and more importantly, if not done by then-explain to her either by words or actions(preferably words at first) exactly what you want from her: "you are cute!".

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 03, 2015 10:02 am 
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Normal people? Are you talking about (last guy) talking about noemal people? My best mate was a normal guy, bodibuilder with a long nose who used to dance laike a bear with a bone desease at the disco. Chiks just flocked around him, he didnt have to do anything, he was normal.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2015 12:23 am 
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What kind of fucked up comment is 'Did you get beaten as a child .. wait don't answer that'. Christ you guys are fucking hopeless. What kind of response did you fucking think you'd get? What if she had been beaten? Did that ever fucking occur to you? These PUA gurus are fucking sick in the head and all this negging is obviously getting you morons nowhere. Why can't you have a laugh without fucking insulting girls all the time? I'm not surprised they wanted you to get the fuck out of their house dude.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2015 1:14 am 
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I usually try to stick to natural game
I love how this term is thrown around. When I read it I usually assume the guy saying it is scared of pickup and wants to stick to pusillanimous half measures.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2015 1:22 am 
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Good-natured teasing and negging are two completely different things.

Negging is what losers do in hopes of lowering or playing on a woman's self-esteem.

Good-natured teasing is not mean in nature. For those who can't tell the difference, start by teasing about things that aren't going to offend most people - their shoes, sense of style, etc. Don't neg things they can't change - such as looks. Also, stay away from jokes about getting beaten as a child or anything else that deals in violence as you never know if a woman has been a victim of abuse or not.

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