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When to push and when to back off?
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Author:  JohnReardon [ Sat Mar 19, 2011 1:46 am ]
Post subject:  When to push and when to back off?
Ok so in short, I have always been able to be decently successful with women in my life. Im a decent looking guy and was always semi-popular in school/have had really good social skills, but I in now way have been like some of my friends (and im sure some of yall) who can go out and snag a HB on the first night they meet. I usually take a bit of time and alot of times I kinda just settle for plan B girl.

However, (I might a post earlier about this girl, 'relighting the flame') and I REALLY want to make this one work. But obviously Im not going to smother her so hers a recent scenario:

I texted this girl Ive recently seen again after a few months of not seeing her at all back and forth a few times on the way back while my friends and I were driving back to town. Our texts were flowing nicely and we were just having a normal fun convo, and then I texted her that I would just call her once I got home. Once I called her I was planning on asking her to meet up sometime so we can have a conversation in person. Problem is that she didnt respond to that text, but once I got home I just decided to call her anyways and when I did she didnt answer. So... I dont know what to do now...

Any advice would be greatly apprciated!
JR
Author:  masseveever [ Sat Mar 19, 2011 8:03 am ]
Post subject:  Re: When to push and when to back off?
Quote:
Ok so in short, I have always been able to be decently successful with women in my life. Im a decent looking guy and was always semi-popular in school/have had really good social skills, but I in now way have been like some of my friends (and im sure some of yall) who can go out and snag a HB on the first night they meet. I usually take a bit of time and alot of times I kinda just settle for plan B girl.

However, (I might a post earlier about this girl, 'relighting the flame') and I REALLY want to make this one work. But obviously Im not going to smother her so hers a recent scenario:

I texted this girl Ive recently seen again after a few months of not seeing her at all back and forth a few times on the way back while my friends and I were driving back to town. Our texts were flowing nicely and we were just having a normal fun convo, and then I texted her that I would just call her once I got home. Once I called her I was planning on asking her to meet up sometime so we can have a conversation in person. Problem is that she didnt respond to that text, but once I got home I just decided to call her anyways and when I did she didnt answer. So... I dont know what to do now...

Any advice would be greatly apprciated!
JR
I think the first problem was you told her you would call her. It's a mistake I've made many a time before: spelling out to the girl what you will do next. Much better to just do it, they don't really like things spelled out although they think they do.

There's not much point in saying it now I suppose, but it would have been better had you said you were gonna' call her and when she didn't reply you didn't actually bother to call her.

She knows where you're going and doesn't wanna go there for some reason. By this stage all you can do is not contact her again, any contact you do make by phone from this point on will be interpreted as neediness and weakness...not attractive.

You could always leave it a while and then send her a message asking her for some advice about a relationship problem you are having with your gf (the imaginary one), that'll mess with her head, and at least she'd feel there was nothing wrong with messaging you back. By that stage though you will probably have to play a lot of catch up.
Author:  JohnReardon [ Sat Mar 19, 2011 2:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ok thanks for the advice. Even if it's too late to help me out with this current situation Im bound to be in another scenario like this again.

But really there's pretty much nothing I can do? I know where she works (which is where I saw her again for the first time in a while) but I thought that if i showed up again there it would be kinda creepy/stalkerish...
Author:  JohnReardon [ Sun Mar 20, 2011 6:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
bump, sorry to keep on bringing this up again but really looking for a way to still make this work guys.

what if i just text her "jerk youre mean"?
Author:  skullring92 [ Sun Mar 20, 2011 8:28 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
what if i just text her "jerk youre mean"?
I think this would sound needy.

Just pull yourself back a bit.Its not that you shouldn't contact her forever.Just don't contact her for a few days.After that you can try to find some genuine reason to contact her like wishing her happy something(birthday,any festival etc)..then she would reply saying thanx and then you can just initiate a normal convo..n try connecting with her using fish and hook strategy.Be sure to end the convo on a high note and you should be the first one to end it.Be sure to reply her back after a little more time than what she took.

In case she doesn't reply to your text, you can send her one of the following texts and these may even help you if you ever get into such a situation:-

"Playing hard to get huh?? ;)"

and then if she replies saying "yeah kinda" or either gives some unsure answer like that or positive response then tease her for trying to hit on you.

Or if she doesn't reply your first text(not incase you wished her in this one for some festival or her b'day etc.):-

"Hmm...something terrible must have happened...hope you and your family are alright!!"

"What! You got kidnapped?? Tell them that i'll pay the ransom."
and then if she takes your bait and plays along then you play along too and then direct the convo in the direction you want to.

I read those lines in some pua material don't remember which one.But you can experiment using you own cocky/funny lines like those.

"Playing hard to get huh??" works well for me and others work too but this one is my fav.

G'luck to you.
Hope that helps.:)
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