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Awkward Silences
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Author:  BlueWolf [ Mon Feb 14, 2011 8:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Awkward Silences
So you've done your opener.
You've done a routine.
Moved onto another routine.
Fluff talked for a bit.
...

Then there's an awkward silence. She looks down at the floor uncomfortably. You act cool and look around the room racking your brains trying to come up with something.

What do you guys do when there's an awkward silence? You've talked about a number of things but then you've just hit a brick wall.
Author:  zebraG [ Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
eg. "Do you know, this is the technique that salesmen use to sell cars? Basically, if you aren't very close to someone, the person looking to buy has to talk to fill the gap. If, however, you're really comfortable with someone you don't; you can just leave these pauses. Heightens the tension.

Of course, it might just be that you're boring and you've told me everything interesting you have to say? No? I'll be the judge of that! Go on, prove me wrong, tell me a cool story."
Author:  Octave [ Tue Feb 15, 2011 12:33 am ]
Post subject: 
awkward pauses create sexual tension. Use it to your advantage. Dont act like its awkward for you though. Holding eye contact during these moments is important. Then escalate.

Look up 60yearsof challenge
Author:  BlueWolf [ Wed Feb 16, 2011 2:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Zebra that's class mate haha, cheers!

@Octave In the situation it would have been awkward to try and create sexual tension. I'd seen her at the gym and then opened at the bus stop on the way home, I already knew her from my Rowing club so it wasn't a cold approach. We chatted on the 15min bus journey back to our uni accommodation, then we waited in the cafeteria for the kitchen to open for food still talking merrily but then when we went to actually line up for food the silences happened - as though we'd ran out of stuff to talk about. I couldn't try to escalate because we had people in front of us and behind us in the queue..

You say to hold eye contact? what if you look at the HB's eyes trying to make it but she's just looking around or down, in that situation eye contact is made when I actually say something (give her a reason to look at me).

After we got our food conversation flowed again, I just felt really uncomfortable during that silence. :?

I'll look up 60yearsof challenge buddy, thanks. :)
Author:  AdamThomas [ Fri Feb 18, 2011 11:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Zebra that's class mate haha, cheers!

@Octave In the situation it would have been awkward to try and create sexual tension. I'd seen her at the gym and then opened at the bus stop on the way home, I already knew her from my Rowing club so it wasn't a cold approach. We chatted on the 15min bus journey back to our uni accommodation, then we waited in the cafeteria for the kitchen to open for food still talking merrily but then when we went to actually line up for food the silences happened - as though we'd ran out of stuff to talk about. I couldn't try to escalate because we had people in front of us and behind us in the queue..

You say to hold eye contact? what if you look at the HB's eyes trying to make it but she's just looking around or down, in that situation eye contact is made when I actually say something (give her a reason to look at me).

After we got our food conversation flowed again, I just felt really uncomfortable during that silence. :?

I'll look up 60yearsof challenge buddy, thanks. :)
None of that shit matters, you can always build sexual tension. You should always be builidng it a little anyway. Silences are only awkward if you let them be. I mean I can sit in a room with anyone from my family, or go somewhere with them, and not say anything for quite a bit. Do you think it feels awkward? No it doesn't, because neither of us care. Same with girls. Obviously you don't want to be silent for too long, but you'll do better if you just relax rather than letting it bother you. It will make it feel like you've known eachother for a long time.

Quote from some movie - "That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence."
Author:  Pepe_Le_Pew [ Sun Feb 20, 2011 9:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Dont act like its awkward for you though.
Ding ding ding, we have a winner!
Author:  Herr Flick [ Mon Feb 21, 2011 12:26 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Dont act like its awkward for you though.
Ding ding ding, we have a winner!
So true! If you let it get to you, they'll notice. If they can't pick up on how you feel about the silence, they'll start grinding their own gears on the matter at hand..

Also FYI: "Quote from some movie - "That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.""

Not just 'some' movie, it's from Pulp Fiction! :)
Author:  AdamThomas [ Mon Feb 21, 2011 8:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Dont act like its awkward for you though.
Ding ding ding, we have a winner!
So true! If you let it get to you, they'll notice. If they can't pick up on how you feel about the silence, they'll start grinding their own gears on the matter at hand..

Also FYI: "Quote from some movie - "That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.""

Not just 'some' movie, it's from Pulp Fiction! :)
Haha I knew which film it was, just forgot the name of it :P
Author:  BlueWolf [ Mon Feb 21, 2011 9:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
@ AdamThomas That is such a good example, the way you are with family and close friends- you're right it's not uncomfortable. I tested this out with a close friend yesterday. It wasn't uncomfortable, it was just neither of us speaking.

This sums it up perfectly. Haven't seen the whole of the film but will definitely at some point in the future. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnVX-uv- ... re=related
Author:  BlueWolf [ Mon Feb 21, 2011 9:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Also @ Herrflick do you mean that they'll start trying to think of things to say to cover the silence? I suppose that seems true.
Author:  Stokzey [ Wed Feb 23, 2011 4:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Do you not know the 3 second rule?!
not that one, the other one
the other one where if there is a silence, and you're looking at each other... then that means she wants to kiss...
Author:  BlueWolf [ Wed Feb 23, 2011 8:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Haha yeh I'm sure she wanted to kiss me in the cafeteria line, with people behind and in front of us :P
Author:  Octave [ Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
lol if the 3 second rule exists at all it is only in certain circumstance i think haha
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