PUA Forum
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

'Oh by the way I have a boyfriend'
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=134&t=34592		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Guest [ Mon Dec 15, 2008 3:32 am ]
Post subject:  'Oh by the way I have a boyfriend'
I keep bumping into this girl that I've K-closed a girl on 2 seperate occasions over the last couple of weeks. The other day I saw her again in a club and during some general chat she brings up the fact that she has a bf... Was wondering what general advice would be? I am really into her & visa versa, but her having a bf obv makes it a strange situation- i cant really ask her out or anything. Any ideas? I do have her number, but I havent called/text her at all.
Author:  Trevino [ Mon Dec 15, 2008 3:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
I had something like this happen to me yesterday. The girl waiting on me and some friends joined us for drinks when she got off. After a bit of chatting, she mentioned something about someone wanting her to move somewhere else. I was in the middle of talking to someone else but overheard it. I joined back into their conversation to get the details. I said, where are you moving? She said some place she was thinking about and I was like, whos asking you to move there? She said some guy she was dating and I just said, oh the weather up there is probably pretty cold right now, not like what we have down here. I kept the conversation going and got her number. She text'd me later that night several times.
Author:  V1V [ Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
On 2 seperate occasions. WHERE?????? HOW FAR APART FROM EACH OTHER? how much comfort did you build????
I think its fair to say youve lost her - if the bf rejection didnt tell you that already.
Author:  Guest [ Mon Dec 15, 2008 10:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sorry didnt explain it well.

kissed her on 2 seperate occasions in a local club- Initially i wasnt actually interested in her and she was the one coming onto me (kept rubbing up against me on dance floor, and leading me to one side). Then 2 week break where I was v busy so didnt go out and didnt see her at all. Although I had her number after the first time we met I never used it because as i said i wasnt really interested (liked a different girl at the time lol- didnt go well either).

Anyway, I met her again at the end of the night at another event and we just chatted for ages and eventually walked back to station (this is where i actually decided i liked her). It was during this chat that she told me like completely casually that she had a long term bf which really suprised me (as she seemed quite a 'nice' girl and obviously had made forward moves on me). I bumped into some m8s there and decided to go back wth them rather than trying anything with her that night, and I havent seen her since (she gave me her number again that night without me asking for it, but I ignored it again).

Anywy my idea ws simply to freeze her out for a month or so and then If i see her after the new year (which I would say is very likely) talk to her, but just act as if im not interested at all and see what she does. A friend suggested maybe i just send out a general sounding text at x mas and see if she replies or anything... (she doesnt have my number so at the moment she has no way of contacting me even if she wanted to).

Any other suggestions would be great tho.

Thanks :)
Author:  Mode-PUA [ Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:27 pm ]
Post subject: 
Just from reading your posts my first thoughts are....be careful of Oneitis!

What do you want from this girl? A Relationship or just sex?

Sounds like she is keen to take things further with you, since she gave you her number a second time without you asking/prompting for it. She wants you to text/call her.

Thing is she is in a LTR that probably isn't going well but she is happy to cheat on him. Who says she wont cheat on you?

Personally I would go for it, text/call her, meet up, get what I want from the girl and then leave it at that without bringing up talk of relationships etc. If she wants to take things further with you then you can decide at that point if you want it or not.
Author:  FNB [ Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
I would say that if a girl brings her "boyfriend" up in anyway with you. It's bad luck! This as you haven't attracted her enough with the attraction switches. http://sinnsofattraction.blogspot.com/2 ... tches.html

In my experience a girl is always open for a new man if she is more attracted to him than her present "boyfriend".
Author:  Ezo [ Tue Dec 16, 2008 4:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
Difficult to tell if this is antislutdefense or a IOD for you... But try it anyways if you like the girl, just dont expect her to leave her BF for you...

HB: I have a BF
PUA: I have a hamster, I wont tell if you dont.
Author:  V1V [ Wed Dec 17, 2008 12:30 am ]
Post subject: 
pua: Wow me too.
or
pua: wow go you!!! I bet its a relief to know you wont be alone your whole life!
Author:  Stormy [ Wed Dec 17, 2008 1:13 am ]
Post subject: 
Depends on the vibe.

This one time, a girl and I were on the verge of making out when she dropped the boyfriend on me. Heavy kino, IOIs all around, flirty vibe in full swing. It was makeout time.

Girl: "I don't know. I have a boyfriend." Said in a shy tone of voice, almost like she was apologizing.

Me: "I don't give a shit." Said with a smile in a mischievous tone of voice, like "yeah, this is wrong, and I don't care. I'm going to kiss you anyway."

And I did.

I don't know what your vibe with this girl is like, but that's how I dealt with it.
Author:  Munroe (MUNROE) [ Wed Dec 17, 2008 2:11 am ]
Post subject: 
It doesn't matter if she has a bf or not. Attraction mechanisms work the same with taken girls as they do with single girls, so just ignore it and stick to the game plan.

If he isn't there, disregard it.
If he is there, endorse him, "This is a really cool guy" "Its cool that you two are dating" etc.

Disqualifying statements are a powerful tool. A willingness to walk away is a great demonstration of confidence, but one of the ultimate expressions of confidence is when you're not only willing to walk away, you're willing to endorse another guy in the process. This is an incredible DHV and will often leave girls dumbfounded and sending you massive IOIs.

It also completely disarms the AMOG.
Author:  Stygian [ Wed Dec 17, 2008 4:10 am ]
Post subject: 
Regardless of her boyfriend.

Women will gravitate towards the best of their options so if you are a better option than him, she will favour you more and vice versa.

I wouldn't worry about it, simply plow through.
Author:  Ezo [ Thu Dec 18, 2008 12:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Depends on the vibe.
This is a great sentence! It can be used in 95% of all questions in the newbie section and in 75% of the rest of the sections.
It is so difficult to know what you should have said or should have done if we do not know the vibe. Remember that in communication like 70% is body language, 20% is tonality and only 10% (or less) are the actual words.
So I try my best to give good advice but sometimes it is just impossible to know what really happened without having been there...

Ezo
Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/