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| Cannot think of things to say or talk about! https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=134&t=184509 |
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| Author: | afctopuafast [ Sat Oct 11, 2014 3:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
What do I say after the opener? Not only after the opener, If I see her on campus a day or two later, what do I say to initiate an conversation? I'll say the usual Hi, How are you, Hows classes, etc. which yields nothing interesting most of the time so nothing to talk about more? This situation has really been eating away at my motivation, to the point where I used to talk to every girl I see, now I don't talk to any or if a girl hits me up and wants to hang out I say I'm busy. Any help would be greatly appreciated |
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| Author: | puaninja [ Sat Oct 11, 2014 6:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Your basically asking how to be a conversationalist. Another method is to have a routine or do routine stacking. The question is whether or not you want to go with a more natural technique and use observational/relevant information that pertains to her specifically, or if you want to just come up with random questions and stories and try to pique her interest that way. Just brainstorming here, but you want to seem interesting right? Like you have something to say. When she asks how your are, don't say "Gud" and then go quiet. Say, "I dunno, life has gotten interesting for me lately." If she inquires why, cool, if not, continue on anyway. "Well, maybe I could actually get your opinion on it since you seem pretty smart." By complimenting her she'll be more willing to engage you. Then you tell a DHV story of some kind, perhaps about how you have an offer from your uncle to go work in California and make good money, but you'd have to drop out of school in order to do it. Girls will eat up something like that and she'll be asking you all kinds of logistical questions and giving you her opinions. It's a lie, yes, but it will help you practice having an involved conversation. Then you can thank her for her feedback and use that as a bonding experience to build off of next time when she asks if you decided yet or not. I mean the "jealous girlfriend" openers and all that are just lies and farces too, so there's nothing wrong with resorting to something like that imo. |
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| Author: | afctopuafast [ Wed Oct 22, 2014 12:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Quote: Your basically asking how to be a conversationalist. Another method is to have a routine or do routine stacking. The question is whether or not you want to go with a more natural technique and use observational/relevant information that pertains to her specifically, or if you want to just come up with random questions and stories and try to pique her interest that way.
Thanks this will help!!Just brainstorming here, but you want to seem interesting right? Like you have something to say. When she asks how your are, don't say "Gud" and then go quiet. Say, "I dunno, life has gotten interesting for me lately." If she inquires why, cool, if not, continue on anyway. "Well, maybe I could actually get your opinion on it since you seem pretty smart." By complimenting her she'll be more willing to engage you. Then you tell a DHV story of some kind, perhaps about how you have an offer from your uncle to go work in California and make good money, but you'd have to drop out of school in order to do it. Girls will eat up something like that and she'll be asking you all kinds of logistical questions and giving you her opinions. It's a lie, yes, but it will help you practice having an involved conversation. Then you can thank her for her feedback and use that as a bonding experience to build off of next time when she asks if you decided yet or not. I mean the "jealous girlfriend" openers and all that are just lies and farces too, so there's nothing wrong with resorting to something like that imo. Also, once i've starting talking to a girl regularly, how do I get her to talk more so im not he only one who has to star a conversation? |
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| Author: | Black Phantom [ Sat Oct 25, 2014 10:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
One of my favorite ways to keep the conversation going after I start it, is to use this structure that I discovered a long time ago, called 2 Questions 1 Comment. If you think about it, when most guys start a conversation with a girl, they ask a question, and then they follow it up with another question, and another question and another...until the girl gets bored and feels like she's being interviewed. But if you look at the cool guys, the guys that start a conversation with a girl and can keep going, you'll notice that while they do ask questions, they do something critically different then other guys that doesn't make them seem like an interviewer. They make a COMMENT. A comment in the conversation is like taking a breath, where the other person can relax a bit and get a break from being the only one talking. The conversation has a pulse, and if you just hammer questions, even if they are open ended, you'll suck the life out of it. There has to be a balance to it. So here are the basic steps to it: 1. Start a conversation by asking a question like, "Hey, what's up" 2. Ask another question, related to what she says back to you 3. When she answers the question, notice the FIRST thing that comes into your mind and make a comment about it. Tell her about it. 4. Ask another question So for example, let's say you're sitting at a bus station, waiting for a bus. Next to you is a hot blonde sitting. You say: 1. So where are you headed today? (question) She says, "O I'm just going to school" 2. You say, "That's awesome - what do you study?" (notice the 2nd question) She says, "I study law" 3. At this point, you make a comment, saying the first thing that comes to your mind about what she said. You say, "Law? That's heavy. I have couple of friends that are into law, but most of them are into it because they've seen too many episodes of L.A law and wanted to be like that..." Now you've made a comment. And if you notice, it just feels RIGHT when you do that. So now you jump start the conversation with another question, which could be "So is that the same story with you or did you have other reasons for taking it up?" ...And you keep going. You can literally keep this on and on for ever, until you don't want to continue. The main thing is that you listen to the KEY words in her answers, which you can use to comment about. So with your friend that you see and want to talk to, use the same model. Ask a question or two, and then based on her answers form a comment...and then ask another question right away. Hope this make sense. O and by the way, if you feel scared of starting a conversation in the first place because of Approach Anxiety, I invite you and anyone reading this to join my test group where I am testing my new AA Cure, which promises to eliminate your AA in under an hour. So far, this is the ONLY systematic way of removing your approach anxiety, where at the end you actually FEEL different, not only think different. The details about how to join are in the signature. So play around the 2 Questions 1 Comment model, it helped me get a lot more natural in conversations. Speak to you soon, |
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| Author: | puatrius [ Sun Oct 26, 2014 12:39 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Well, what I realized for myself again today is that what you say doesn't matter at all! Just show confidence, smile (show her that you have a great time) and keep looking in her eyes if you are talking to her. My todays example was in the supermarked, I was standing beside a beautifull girl in the checkout and I said something like "You look cute. Do you live here around?" I was scared and didn't know what to say like you, but forced myself to jump in the unknown and after spoken out that sentence I thought "God, I screwed up!", but amazingly (however the opening is quite poor I guess) her respond was nothing than happily surprised as if I just gave her a wonderfull present. After that we had a nice conversation, I performed some kino's and finally got her number. I am still far away from a being a good PUA (actually i am just a beginner), but it's a great help form me already knowing that big rejections are rare as long as you follow these rules. |
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| Author: | oceanx [ Sun Oct 26, 2014 3:22 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Quote: Well, what I realized for myself again today is that what you say doesn't matter at all! Just show confidence, smile (show her that you have a great time) and keep looking in her eyes if you are talking to her.
Exactly.Quote: My todays example was in the supermarked, I was standing beside a beautifull girl in the checkout and I said something like "You look cute. Do you live here around?" I was scared and didn't know what to say like you, but forced myself to jump in the unknown and after spoken out that sentence I thought "God, I screwed up!", but amazingly (however the opening is quite poor I guess) her respond was nothing than happily surprised as if I just gave her a wonderfull present. After that we had a nice conversation, I performed some kino's and finally got her number.
You made her day. That's what this stuff is all about. Well done man.
I am still far away from a being a good PUA (actually i am just a beginner), but it's a great help form me already knowing that big rejections are rare as long as you follow these rules. |
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| Author: | puatrius [ Sun Oct 26, 2014 4:44 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Quote: You made her day. That's what this stuff is all about. Well done man.
Thank s |
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| Author: | puatrius [ Sun Oct 26, 2014 6:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Perhaps another helpful story to anyone with approaching anxiety: (choosing not to approach because of not knowning what to say is also some kind of approaching anxiety I guess) A beautifull girl who is living in the same house as me, with whom (by the way) I ended up in the friend zone because i discoverend this PUA stuff too late So, isn't this a wise lesson to all of us guys, telling that approaching a girl isn't just the most beautiful present we can give her, it's even our duty if we don't want to risk that we make the girl sad for days like my roommate. |
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| Author: | oceanx [ Sun Oct 26, 2014 6:48 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Cannot think of things to say or talk about! |
Quote: Perhaps another helpful story to anyone with approaching anxiety:
Beautiful post. Thanks for posting this.
(choosing not to approach because of not knowning what to say is also some kind of approaching anxiety I guess) A beautifull girl who is living in the same house as me, with whom (by the way) I ended up in the friend zone because i discoverend this PUA stuff too late So, isn't this a wise lesson to all of us guys, telling that approaching a girl isn't just the most beautiful present we can give her, it's even our duty if we don't want to risk that we make the girl sad for days like my roommate. |
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