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Flaked. Did I handle It Right?
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Author:  Klever [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 1:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Flaked. Did I handle It Right?
She texted me:

"Don't be mad but i have 2 work on some stuff on the computer at work meaning I cant come. Sorry"

I texted back almost an hour later:

"K. Heading to (city) with my friend then. She hates lonely rides"

Be brutally honest with me on your thoughts.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 1:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Very good answer!
Author:  Chinopants [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 1:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
latter on might send her a picture of you having an awesome time out with hot girls. This will fill her up with the what if an what am i missing thoughts. Just a pic no words.
Author:  puaninja [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 3:52 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well, obviously she is just coming up with an excuse to cancel your date. And it's obvious that you are responding to her to let her know you are not going to let that phase you and you're still going to have a good time, eventhough the reasons both of you gave are probably not even true.

This one girl actually told me she couldn't go out because she had homework to do. I told her that's gay, and that I'm a lot funner than homowork. I thought that was a good comeback.

Anyway, I would've called her out for being lame and choosing work over having a social life. While choosing work or school over dating is the responsible thing to do, you certainly aren't going to impress anyone you are trying to date by choosing to do something lame rather than seeing them. Which is why I view that as an insult, and why you should call them out and tell them they are lame.
Author:  Klever [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 5:14 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the input guys. She texted back 3 times & wants to reschedule, but I haven't answered yet.
Author:  puaninja [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 5:35 pm ]
Post subject: 
It may have been a legit excuse, who knows. But I'd still make her sweat it out as a matter of principle. I would also suggest rejecting the first reschedule she offers. For example, you'd say:"Thursday? That's no good for me. What about Friday instead?" Just so you don't seem like you are too available and jumping at the very next encounter she presents to you.
Author:  Klever [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 6:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
It may have been a legit excuse, who knows. But I'd still make her sweat it out as a matter of principle. I would also suggest rejecting the first reschedule she offers. For example, you'd say:"Thursday? That's no good for me. What about Friday instead?" Just so you don't seem like you are too available and jumping at the very next encounter she presents to you.
Good suggestion but I took a slightly different approach. She asked if Friday was OK and I said:

"Sorry [for not answering earlier], was eating Chinese with my friend. Tomorrow's fine, but prefer 10am, will be busy afternoon."

^This way I set a specific parameter and see if she is actually interested by the awkward time.

She replied in less than a minute said it was good (we'll see).

Will gladly take any suggestions, insight, or comments or even criticism.
Author:  puaninja [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 7:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
You shouldn't have apologized, especially for something like not responding in a timely manner. Although sometimes out of habit I will say sorry for this or that, so I understand why you said it.

The whole point of rejecting her time frame is to show her that you simply don't care that much about going out with her, and if it's not convenient for you then you won't go. And it also conveys that you are a busy guy with things going on in your life aside from her. All in all you did good, so let us know how it turns out.
Author:  Klever [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 2:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
You shouldn't have apologized, especially for something like not responding in a timely manner. Although sometimes out of habit I will say sorry for this or that, so I understand why you said it.

The whole point of rejecting her time frame is to show her that you simply don't care that much about going out with her, and if it's not convenient for you then you won't go. And it also conveys that you are a busy guy with things going on in your life aside from her. All in all you did good, so let us know how it turns out.
Thanks for the input fellow. Really appreciate it, learned a ton thanks to people like you these past 4 years.

UPDATE

So she texts me 40 minutes late and says "I just woke up, about to get ready. You still wanna go?"

I responded "Hurry before I change my mind."

She said "I'll be there in about an hour. Ok?"

I said "No prob, just don't (inside joke, irrelevant)"

She says "lol"


Brief background:
I'm 20. She's 23, invited me to breakfast and she's picking me up at my parent's house.

Any relevant input will be much appreciated. I'd like to hear anyone's thoughts/criticism, even on if-scenarios, or tips.
Author:  puaninja [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 4:28 pm ]
Post subject: 
Why do you need so much validation and advice at every juncture bro? "Ok, she texted me back, now what!?"

I think you have a good foundation of pickup knowledge and you understand the game. You need to stretch your wings a bit and make things happen on your own now. That is called living life.
Author:  Klever [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 6:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Why do you need so much validation and advice at every juncture bro? "Ok, she texted me back, now what!?"

I think you have a good foundation of pickup knowledge and you understand the game. You need to stretch your wings a bit and make things happen on your own now. That is called living life.
Weren't you the one who asked me for an update? Anyway, thanks for the advice.

Peace
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