PUA Forum :: Keeping conversations going

The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER.

This is something my mentor, Arash Dibazar, has been discussing a lot lately.

Do not think of your own comfort or needs. Think about how you can genuinely show her a good time.

Now that you are in this frame, you have to identify what you're PASSIONATE about. This will tell you what kind of person you are and will help you recognize your personality and how to best integrate it in your material. It's always great to have some fallback routines such as the best friends test or ESP routine or some lame magic trick (you can look those up). BUT it is important to have fun and BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING. This is how you do not come off fake and therefore let you're true personality show.

Hope this helps. If you have any other questions just PM me.

Regards,
Sep

I'm new here and I am very glad now to be part of this interesting, exciting community.

I have read around a bit on this forum, books, youtube etc. and still have some trouble with this major issue: keeping conversations going. Opening up is not a problem, there are plenty of methods, the thing is what do I talk about after this? I know there isn't a structure plan for this, and this is all but logical because this is the spontaneous part, but aren't there any trick, tips or ideas to keep in your head while conversating with a girl and how to keep it going?

Furthermore, do you guys have any recommendations of ebooks or other material on this topic?

Thanks a bunch in advance!

Quote:

Thanks for your reply. But this is actually a contradiction of what I've learned and read about the subject. Shouldn't I get in a frame where she needs to serve me because I'm higher value? Or what do you mean by me serving her?

I understand I can talk about my passions and let myself be entertained also, but isn't it preferable to let her talk about herself because women enjoy this and it's like they are giving me demonstrations of their value?

Quote:

You misunderstand what I'm saying. I am not talking about the Mystery Method. I am talking about your inner game and frame of mind.

Arash tells it like this. Take the slave and the samurai. They both serve, but one serves WILLINGLY knowing that he holds the power and can withdraw his services at any point. The other (the slave obviously) serves because he has no choice.

I am not saying to be needy. Yes you WANT her to DHV herself, that is A3 of the Mystery Method.

I'm talking about having the mindset that you've already had sex with her multiple times and you are GENUINELY out to show her a good time. Having this attitude makes all the difference in the world. You are no longer trying to win her pussy and thus you aren't chasing her.

Hope that cleared this up.

The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER.

Author:	Squeelpiggy [ Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:19 pm ]
Post subject:	Keeping conversations going
I'm new here and I am very glad now to be part of this interesting, exciting community. I have read around a bit on this forum, books, youtube etc. and still have some trouble with this major issue: keeping conversations going. Opening up is not a problem, there are plenty of methods, the thing is what do I talk about after this? I know there isn't a structure plan for this, and this is all but logical because this is the spontaneous part, but aren't there any trick, tips or ideas to keep in your head while conversating with a girl and how to keep it going? Furthermore, do you guys have any recommendations of ebooks or other material on this topic? Thanks a bunch in advance!

Author:	seph89 [ Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:38 pm ]
Post subject:
The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER. This is something my mentor, Arash Dibazar, has been discussing a lot lately. Do not think of your own comfort or needs. Think about how you can genuinely show her a good time. Now that you are in this frame, you have to identify what you're PASSIONATE about. This will tell you what kind of person you are and will help you recognize your personality and how to best integrate it in your material. It's always great to have some fallback routines such as the best friends test or ESP routine or some lame magic trick (you can look those up). BUT it is important to have fun and BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING. This is how you do not come off fake and therefore let you're true personality show. Hope this helps. If you have any other questions just PM me. Regards, Sep

Author:	Squeelpiggy [ Wed Mar 07, 2012 10:54 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER. This is something my mentor, Arash Dibazar, has been discussing a lot lately. Do not think of your own comfort or needs. Think about how you can genuinely show her a good time. Now that you are in this frame, you have to identify what you're PASSIONATE about. This will tell you what kind of person you are and will help you recognize your personality and how to best integrate it in your material. It's always great to have some fallback routines such as the best friends test or ESP routine or some lame magic trick (you can look those up). BUT it is important to have fun and BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING. This is how you do not come off fake and therefore let you're true personality show. Hope this helps. If you have any other questions just PM me. Regards, Sep Thanks for your reply. But this is actually a contradiction of what I've learned and read about the subject. Shouldn't I get in a frame where she needs to serve me because I'm higher value? Or what do you mean by me serving her? I understand I can talk about my passions and let myself be entertained also, but isn't it preferable to let her talk about herself because women enjoy this and it's like they are giving me demonstrations of their value?

Author:	abyys [ Wed Mar 07, 2012 11:27 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Keeping conversations going
Quote: I'm new here and I am very glad now to be part of this interesting, exciting community. I have read around a bit on this forum, books, youtube etc. and still have some trouble with this major issue: keeping conversations going. Opening up is not a problem, there are plenty of methods, the thing is what do I talk about after this? I know there isn't a structure plan for this, and this is all but logical because this is the spontaneous part, but aren't there any trick, tips or ideas to keep in your head while conversating with a girl and how to keep it going? Furthermore, do you guys have any recommendations of ebooks or other material on this topic? Thanks a bunch in advance! Basically you want to get into cycle of rapport building through qualification and then breaking rapport. qualification is usually in the form of a question, basically any question where shes telling herself something about you, means she is qualifying to you, the deeper/more personal this question, the better qualification you get. Then that leads to rapport, where you can talk to the girl about stuff, follow by some break in rapport, ie teasing. (im not going to go into sexual escalation or kino because its not what you asked, but obviously these are important too) With the quali question its sometimes good to make a statement first if its out of the blue, rather than just being like "so, whats your main passion in life" would be fake if it was not part of the conversation, so make a statement to link it, ie if your talking about vending machines, lead the conversation like "i wonder who fills those, what a job that must be, defiantly not my ideal job" pause and she might even start the qauli without the question, then if nothing say "id really like to be blahh blah balh because im passionate about it" and then ask your question. Basically you want to talk about something REALLY deep. So you need to lead the conversation in that direction, at some point, but let it flow. That way your conversation is leading somewhere but also you only lead it there when you run out of things to say. Main points are: -listen to what she says, comment on ANYTHING she says that might spark a conversation -statements of your view before asking a question sometimes make it less "random" as if your trying to make conversation -Use justification when and where you can, if its a random girl and you ask a question, realize shes uncomfortable with it, then tell her WHY you are asking the question, doesn't have to be a valid reason can just be BS like "becuase you look cool", its a psychological thing, people need justification even if they know the justification is bullshit. El topo (steve mayeda) and sinn have great speeches on this, youtube them with 21 convention in the title.

Author:	maleaco [ Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:24 pm ]
Post subject:
I agree with the above poster, I feel like I just figure out what I am passionate about and what she is passionate about in the first conversation and it quickly tells me what kind of girl she is

PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Keeping conversations going https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=134&t=130570	Page 1 of 1

Author:	seph89 [ Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:24 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER. This is something my mentor, Arash Dibazar, has been discussing a lot lately. Do not think of your own comfort or needs. Think about how you can genuinely show her a good time. Now that you are in this frame, you have to identify what you're PASSIONATE about. This will tell you what kind of person you are and will help you recognize your personality and how to best integrate it in your material. It's always great to have some fallback routines such as the best friends test or ESP routine or some lame magic trick (you can look those up). BUT it is important to have fun and BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING. This is how you do not come off fake and therefore let you're true personality show. Hope this helps. If you have any other questions just PM me. Regards, Sep Thanks for your reply. But this is actually a contradiction of what I've learned and read about the subject. Shouldn't I get in a frame where she needs to serve me because I'm higher value? Or what do you mean by me serving her? I understand I can talk about my passions and let myself be entertained also, but isn't it preferable to let her talk about herself because women enjoy this and it's like they are giving me demonstrations of their value? You misunderstand what I'm saying. I am not talking about the Mystery Method. I am talking about your inner game and frame of mind. Arash tells it like this. Take the slave and the samurai. They both serve, but one serves WILLINGLY knowing that he holds the power and can withdraw his services at any point. The other (the slave obviously) serves because he has no choice. I am not saying to be needy. Yes you WANT her to DHV herself, that is A3 of the Mystery Method. I'm talking about having the mindset that you've already had sex with her multiple times and you are GENUINELY out to show her a good time. Having this attitude makes all the difference in the world. You are no longer trying to win her pussy and thus you aren't chasing her. Hope that cleared this up.

Author:	RedCali [ Mon Mar 12, 2012 6:55 am ]
Post subject:
Abyys makes some good points, like making a statement prior to a quali question so you avoid the "why are you asking me this?" as much as possible. The easiest for me is storytelling with DHV "spikes" and then linking an issue to a question afterward, though this may fall more into A2, but the question at the end of the story can lead to A3. For example ill talk about a mansion pool party my friends were invited to, how my friend was afraid to go because of his Gf, and ask what their opinion is on their bf hanging around girls at a pool party. From there you can neg their response and continue qualifying, then talk about trust in relationships to build comfort. Basically, you should have some decent stories ready that can trail off into deeper convo. Anything involving analysis of.human emotions works great. If you want an idea, search "Neil Strauss Jessica Alba" on YouTube and watch how he turns Alba's statements into deep convo. It should be a spontaneous action, just like you were talking to your psychology professor about blah blah.

Author:	Genetix [ Mon Mar 12, 2012 7:08 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Keeping conversations going
Quote: I'm new here and I am very glad now to be part of this interesting, exciting community. I have read around a bit on this forum, books, youtube etc. and still have some trouble with this major issue: keeping conversations going. Opening up is not a problem, there are plenty of methods, the thing is what do I talk about after this? I know there isn't a structure plan for this, and this is all but logical because this is the spontaneous part, but aren't there any trick, tips or ideas to keep in your head while conversating with a girl and how to keep it going? Furthermore, do you guys have any recommendations of ebooks or other material on this topic? Thanks a bunch in advance! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZB26ZVLOdM Check this out.

Author:	Squeelpiggy [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:16 pm ]
Post subject:
This Arash is the sh*t! Been watching a few vids of him now and he can explain things very well and is very persuasive, definitely a recommendation

Author:	abyys [ Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:20 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Quote: The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER. This is something my mentor, Arash Dibazar, has been discussing a lot lately. Do not think of your own comfort or needs. Think about how you can genuinely show her a good time. Now that you are in this frame, you have to identify what you're PASSIONATE about. This will tell you what kind of person you are and will help you recognize your personality and how to best integrate it in your material. It's always great to have some fallback routines such as the best friends test or ESP routine or some lame magic trick (you can look those up). BUT it is important to have fun and BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING. This is how you do not come off fake and therefore let you're true personality show. Hope this helps. If you have any other questions just PM me. Regards, Sep Thanks for your reply. But this is actually a contradiction of what I've learned and read about the subject. Shouldn't I get in a frame where she needs to serve me because I'm higher value? Or what do you mean by me serving her? I understand I can talk about my passions and let myself be entertained also, but isn't it preferable to let her talk about herself because women enjoy this and it's like they are giving me demonstrations of their value? You misunderstand what I'm saying. I am not talking about the Mystery Method. I am talking about your inner game and frame of mind. Arash tells it like this. Take the slave and the samurai. They both serve, but one serves WILLINGLY knowing that he holds the power and can withdraw his services at any point. The other (the slave obviously) serves because he has no choice. I am not saying to be needy. Yes you WANT her to DHV herself, that is A3 of the Mystery Method. I'm talking about having the mindset that you've already had sex with her multiple times and you are GENUINELY out to show her a good time. Having this attitude makes all the difference in the world. You are no longer trying to win her pussy and thus you aren't chasing her. Hope that cleared this up. Screw any thoughts about who's serving who and "DHV" stories. The only thing useful there was to be in the mindset to have fun. Having the mindset you've had sex with her multiple times makes no sense. Why not just say "don't feel awkward about sexual tension and conversations with her". It might not be MM this method your learning, but it seems to be the same pit holes. Your not learning why things work, but rather what works without understanding why. DHV stories themselves don't work, there is a reason they can increase your chances sometimes, and understanding this is much better rather than using any "DHV" stories. Also having the mindset you've slept with her multiple times is wrong, you haven't. Learning why certain(not all!) attitudes and behaviors that come from it are better, such as feeling comfortable around her and touching her body, and instead of deluding yourself you've slept with her to make you better at "MPUA", why not be normal and natural and respect but dominate and feel comfortable with her body and the sexual tension between you two, and talking in a seductive way without feeling akward. What I'm trying to say is that all of these could be a result of already sleeping with her, but why not go straight to the source, rather than trying to convince yourself of something that isn't true to achieve these attitudes. As for value, the best thing is to respect her like any other human being, its not a battle of who is serving who. Even mystery method does this without realizing it, qualification, trying to get the girl to think your higher value, but then a statement of interest, which is the other way round. Having a misogynistic-lite psychology isn't going to get you many good relationships, sure a lot of insecure girls will lap it up, the idea of treating them as "lower" value than you. But a real Casanova can get these girls anyways, without being a total dick to them, and also great relationships.

Author:	MadTown Mayhem [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 2:12 am ]
Post subject:
If your conversation comes to a screeching halt you're probably thinking too much about what to say next. The topic doesn't have to follow a linear or logical progression, have you ever heard two women talk? Just keep the tempo lively and try a little C&F banter. Somewhere along the line you should be able to find something to use for storytelling, or she will tell you a story of her own. Try this: next time before you approach, find something situational in the area: somebody talking too loud in their cell phone, a dog, a store across the street, an expensive car parked outside, etc. Right before you reach that awkward silence, and you'll know when it is coming up, say "Hey, look at ______." Then follow up immediately with a story that is related to it, or ask her what she thinks of or feels about it (it should not be anything that generates negative emotions). Compliment her on her shoes or purse. It can be just about anything as long as it is positive and in the flow of conversation.

Author:	thedocta [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:49 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: The first mindset you need to put yourself in is the frame that you are there to SERVE HER. I don't think that's a good mindset to be in...at least not when you put it like that. If I mentally put my mindset of serving someone it's going to make me into a complacent little bitch that she doesn't have to work for, which becomes quickly uninteresting to her. It's true that you are serving her...you are giving her humor, intrigue, adventure, and hopefully a cocktail of emotions that drive her wild...but you aren't giving her this from the mindset of "serving." You are giving it from the mindset of having a good time and essentially taunting her...being perceptive of her needs and boundaries and pushing up against them, but not crossing them, etc.

Page 1 of 1	All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/