Need advice , things getting colder



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PostPosted: Sun Jul 16, 2017 11:46 pm 
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I've been dating this girl for a month, we meet 3-4 days a week, talk on the phone every night until she falls as sleep.At first she really love it but I know i made a mistake that i've been to available to her. She acted a little bit colder a few days ago but we still contact each other, I still called her last night. But i know there's something that i have to fix. The problem is how can i stop calling her ? Does it make her few bad ? Should i care or not ? Should i tell her the reason why i can't call her or just stop calling ? And least but not last , is it too late to fix this ?


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:27 am 
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Quote:
I've been dating this girl for a month, we meet 3-4 days a week, talk on the phone every night until she falls as sleep.

Stop doing this.
Quote:
At first she really love it but I know i made a mistake that i've been to available to her.
Yep.

Quote:
She acted a little bit colder a few days ago but we still contact each other, I still called her last night.
Why?

Quote:
But i know there's something that i have to fix. The problem is how can i stop calling her ?
How about ACTING LIKE A MAN and learning to control your emotions? It's okay if you don't talk to her every night.

How old are you, BTW?
Quote:
Does it make her few bad ? Should i care or not ? Should i tell her the reason why i can't call her or just stop calling ? And least but not last , is it too late to fix this ?
God damn you're acting neurotic. It's been one month. Give the woman some space and practice controlling your emotions.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 1:47 pm 
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Just pull back man.

I usually talk to my girls on the phone everyday too, but the difference is, they call me. It's rare that I'll pick up my phone and call a girl after the emotional connection has been establish. Im here from them when they need me.

If what you're doing isn't working, do something new.

The door says "pull", pushing on it is not going to get it to open.

Don't explain, just pull back a lil bit. Leave her room to start to chase you.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 4:53 pm 
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OP, are you in an exclusive relationship with this girl?

Stop calling her for a bit, give her room to breathe. Seeing her 3-4 times a week and calling her every night until she falls asleep makes it look like you have nothing in your life but her. You're smothering her and if you don't pull back, she's going to freak out, pull back herself or pull out completely.

You're just pushing her towards another guy. They really do hate this kind of behaviour so early on in the relationship.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 6:10 pm 
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They really do hate this kind of behaviour so early on in the relationship.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 10:37 pm 
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Like everyone says, pull back. ""If you love her, let her go, if she loves you back she will come back" If not there is your answer. If you have selfrespect and multipleoptions you will not contact her again.

If she asks why you don't call me anymore or be available 24/7 you tell her you were busy with work/friends and life in general.

Girls love to chase so let them chase, be a catch, a winner and you will live a happy life. Don't pretend to live a fun life but actually build a fun life with friends and successful things.

I learned when you don't make girls your priority you become their priority.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 26, 2017 1:01 am 
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We broke up 3 days before. I wasn't man up enough to read your guys replies and let my emotional control over my action. I just couldn't help but keep doing the same thing lol. She tired after everything i've done. One thing I have to admit after this : You guys are awesome :)) Most of the things you guys post in this forum are so damn true haha. even though i broke up with her but I've learnt something. Sorry i haven't dated anyone for 5 years so I handled this one so badly. One more thing, after break up she texted me the next morning : " I just want to say sorry, you don't have to reply me" , i didn't respond. This afternoon i received another one asking how am i doin . Still no respond from me. I went NC right after we broke up. I made some cool DYI stuffs for her , those stuffs she's still keeping in her room, I taught her piano and let her borrow my digital piano which she's still keeping as well. Do you think going NC would help me get her back in this situation ? Of course i will change the way I treat her :) I will reply her text when either she wants me to get my piano back or she says she misses me. Is that a good way to behave now ?


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 26, 2017 1:59 am 
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We broke up 3 days before. I wasn't man up enough to read your guys replies and let my emotional control over my action. I just couldn't help but keep doing the same thing lol.
Sorry to hear that, my friend.

Take a sticky note, and write this on it:

"Am I being impulsive? Am I over-contacting this woman?"

Then stick it to your smart phone.


It's a good sign that she's still contacting you. But you need to pull back and show you are capable of controlling your emotions.

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