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what frame to have in this situation??
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Author:  DM [ Wed May 22, 2013 1:11 am ]
Post subject:  what frame to have in this situation??

my girlfriend of a few months and i were supposed to see each other tomorrow, but it appears today shes made plans to see her best friend, and will cancel hanging out with me (i found this out, she hasnt told me yet). Whats a good frame to have in this situation. It shi**y to have someone cancel like that, and i want her to understand this without sounding too possessive. need some input!

Author:  Jay (Majik) [ Wed May 22, 2013 1:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: what frame to have in this situation??

Quote:
my girlfriend of a few months and i were supposed to see each other tomorrow, but it appears today shes made plans to see her best friend, and will cancel hanging out with me (i found this out, she hasnt told me yet). Whats a good frame to have in this situation. It shi**y to have someone cancel like that, and i want her to understand this without sounding too possessive. need some input!

Just say "no big deal" and go out with your friends...

Author:  Wolfwoodd [ Wed May 22, 2013 3:13 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: what frame to have in this situation??

How often do you see your girlfriend? How often does she see her friend?

-Wolf

Author:  vhou812 [ Wed May 22, 2013 7:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: what frame to have in this situation??

Central to this is WHY she is canceling.

Sometimes you need to understand the world doesn't revolve around you. Expecting her not to console a close friend going through a breakup, or divorce, or loss of a job or shit like that just because you had plans to go catch a movie really isn't cool, and sometimes you gotta accept that your girl is needed more by friends than by you at times. In those cases, you gotta let it go and play it cool.

If she's canceling dinner with you so she can just go have drinks with her friends for no apparent reason, that is not something I tend to accept so lightly, as I would consider it disrespectful if you had already made plans.

I'd let the why determine how you react.

Author:  DM [ Thu May 23, 2013 1:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: what frame to have in this situation??

yea, its only drama if you make it drama, right. Either way, it was supposed to be casual, but the way it was brought was along the lines of 'best friend always comes before boyfriend' and thats what put me in a dilemma:$

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