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| My first true LTR https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=138071 |
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| Author: | Mr.Confident [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 12:18 am ] |
| Post subject: | My first true LTR |
So like this is kind of embarrassing but I've never had a real LTR . So like I was wondering if anybody who has had positive/negative experiences with LTR can give me advice. The girl im gonna have an LTR with is literally my best friend. She was always there for me, I always talked to her about other girls, we tease each other, and other people have asked if we were going out befire and you know were just so close. Although we have had some small drama and we got that all sorted out and Ive proceeded to ask her out because I really cant see other girls without always thinking about her... I'm not sure if i can explain the feeling but im always in a good mood when im talking to her. one a side note~She wants to take things real slow. But I know how to escalate really well so Idk if i should respect her decision or if its just something she says so she doesn't seem like a slut. Opinions on this please. I'm not really sure if any of this info is relevant to the question but I hope it gives you an idea of my situation. I guess I want some really solid advice on relationships. Because I really think I can get serious with her. I appreciate the help, I feel like an AFC when it comes to relationships. ~Mr.Confident |
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| Author: | dark one [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 12:40 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
1# establish trust! This is the most important thing! don't be the jealous bf, and make sure if she shows any signs of jealousy that you put a stop to it right away! tell her you will give her 100% of your trust, but as soon as she breaks it you will walk, and let her know that she cant accuse you of thing you have not done. 2# Communicate, women are emotional and will bottle things up inside so you need to open the lines of communication from the get go! you need to be able to work through your problems and not ignore each other, or play the "get even" game, you should both strive to make each other happy. 3# DO NOT! put you self in a position were you could cheat!! this can be hard at times and im sure right now you are thinking "I love her to much to do it" but we all have the ability to cheat, its just a matter of whether you have the common sens to get your self out of a situation that could cause you to cheat, if you are talking to an HB 10, and you know you there is a chance you could cheat or so something your gf would be mad about then remove you self from the situation!! it can be hard sometimes! but just have the common sens to walk away. 4# Keep thing interesting, don't become boring! after a while you will find your relationship to seem "routine" and that's when you should spice it up a bit by trying something new in bed, taking her away for a weekend in another city, taking her on an exciting date! don't let your relationship get boring. 5# Talk about what you both want in a relationship, and a partner. You should both have similar goals in life, you should both want similar things, because if you don't, once the "honey moon" phase wears off you will start to drift apart...you will be working towards two different goals in life and in your relationship. This is something you need to think hard and long about! Do you want the same things in life? if not then get out now! its a lot easier now then a year from now! Hope those tips helped! |
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| Author: | dark one [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 12:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
One last tip What kind of relationship does she have with her father and mother? The relationship she has with her father will for the most part dictate how she will treat you long term, how much she will ultimately trusted you, and how much she will respect you and men in general. If she she doesn't have a good relationship with her father then brace your self for a lot of drama down the road! The relationship she has with her mother will show you the kind of women she might end up becoming. Of course she wont be 100% like her mother, but if her mother is a good mother, and a solid role model, then she will prob grow up to be similar. |
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| Author: | Mr.Confident [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 1:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Comment removed by Mr.Confident |
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| Author: | dark one [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 2:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I will answer the first questions you asked first. What I meant by wanting the same things was what are your goals in life? what are your priorities? for example: he does not drink, he works out and eats healthy, he lives a healthy life style, he is a religious person. She hates working out, drinks and parties all the time, eats poorly, and doesn't beleve there is a god Now do you think this relationship will work out long term? or do you think it will fail? If you ask me they will grow apart since they have different priorities and beliefs. Secondly were do you both see the relationship going? if she see's it as a summer fling and you see it was a long term commitment then its not going to work out...you have to be working towards the same things in a relationship....almost like a team. You said she doesn't feel like she wants a guy in her life or commitment correct? and you told her you would "risk it"? there are two things wrong with this, 1# you don't want the same things...you can wish all you want but if she doesn't want it you are not going to change her mind, and 2# you saying "il risk it" is like saying "I will do anything you want even if it means sacrificing my happiness so that I can be with you"...you have given her the option to bail on the relationship by saying what you said, it shouldn't be a risk. With women like in business you state what you want and you don't back down...you have to always be willing to talk away in order to have the upper hand. If you want a long term relationship with her you should say "Listen I really like you, i think your an amazing person and I want to have a committed relationship with you, I think we would make a great couple but you don't seem like you want the same things in a relationship that I do so I think we are better off as friends". It sucks I know! you really like this girl correct? well it will suck less then when she breaks up with you because she rushed into a relationship and you go from best friends to never speaking again. These are the kind of talks you need to have with her or any future girlfriends! You don't look weak when you tell a girl you like her, you look weak when you cater to her, alpha males simply state what they want and don't accept anything less and if she doesnt want the same things then so what? it will suck but there are billions of women out there so be willing to talk away! |
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| Author: | dark one [ Mon Jun 11, 2012 2:35 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
As for the parents they are not a deal breaker just something you need to take a look at, women who don't have good relationships with their fathers tend to have commitment issues, bad relationships, trust issues ect ect...not all of them but 99% of them and its a very hard thing to change! its something you cant make her change but that she has to change on her own and be willing to. |
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