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| Is calling her out on her behaviour alpha or needy https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=132449 |
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| Author: | Discipline [ Mon Apr 02, 2012 4:12 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Is calling her out on her behaviour alpha or needy |
I usually only give advice on these forums, but this time I'd love to have your opinions about how to handle the situation I am in. I see my girl about once a week. While this can be great cause I love spending time with friends and play football, I rarely hear from her throughout the week. I am used to getting text messages from girls that are into me, wondering how I am doing, but I never get such texts from her. FYI, she broke up with most of her previous boyfriends cause they either came off as needy or bored her. She just turned 18 and we have been together for one or two months or so. To solve this I started doing what I usually do. I froze her out for a week. This didn't solve it. What would you guys reckon I should do to have her give me more attention and text me more? Calling her out on it might come off as needy. |
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| Author: | Lebenskunstler [ Mon Apr 02, 2012 4:40 pm ] |
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Don't call her out, it does come of as needy. You two did agree on having a relationship together, but she wants to experience your role as a man before she'll surrender to you. You two should end being on the same team and be able to be completely yourself. No games anymore. At this point you want to see her more than she wants to see you. Focus on being her man. Start leading her and show your personality and beliefs. Also give her lots of space to talk about herself and her beliefs so the two of you will start to know eachother deeply. Be honest though when you have a different opinion and if there is need to argue. Go and fight a little! that's healthy! Never get out of balance though. When she sticks to her opinion/misinterprestes your opinion, never change yours. Instead of convincing her about your opinion be a little loose and say. Well we probably have different opinions about this, and thats nothing but healthy. What i'm trying to say is she wants to be convinced she can rely on you so that she will surrender! bring in some emotion! The two of you need to build up a life together. - Visit places together (slowly build this up from café's to dinners and finally vacations) - Visit eachothers family (first casually meet her sister in a bar and finally eat dinner at her familly's place) - Share beliefs and insights (What is your plan for the furure an what are her's) - Explore new things together (you both like sishi but never visited that restaurant) - Set future goals together Remember girls can freek out if you push the above list too hard. So first show her your personality/beliefs/goals in life etc. without her being mixed in it. She will think about it when you are abcent and starts to picture herself in your future plans. She will slowly start to bind to you If you want my example of how i behave towards a girl that has already completely surrendered to me read this; here-vp623707.html#623707 She was a very independant girl when i met her but i made sure we maintained contact every day!!!! After a year she surrendered to me and whe had a deep connection. You have to have contact every day! PU rules like not caling her are bs when it comes to having a relationship. You should be on the same team here! No games |
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| Author: | Reo [ Mon Apr 02, 2012 5:14 pm ] |
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Are you in highschool at different schools? If not most couples see eachother 3 to 5 times a week and call eachother the other days even if its just a short conversation. Unless its a long distance relationship then you still need to talk on the phone. Having contact only once a week is bad for a relationship that's not going to last. I wouldn't worry about her past relationships. Wanting to see and hear from your girlfriend is not being needy. |
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| Author: | Sonicvega [ Mon Apr 02, 2012 5:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I agree with love star . What you really want to focus on is leading her. Maybe she is one of those girls that gives the nice guys a chance and then has buyers remorse. I would engage and invite her to to activities which engage her physically and mentally and build from there. |
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| Author: | Discipline [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Alright, I appreciate your opinions, thanks! I will transfer from PUA gaming to being a bf. No more playing games. Being alpha (I don't often use the term being a PUA) requires taking risks and testing new things. I will certainly test this. I won't call her out on it, but instead I will lead on. I will keep you updated! |
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| Author: | pumpington [ Tue Apr 03, 2012 8:26 pm ] |
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it's not about calling her out or not calling her out, it is about actually being needy or not being needy, totally depends on the frame around what is happening, one guy could be calling a dis-interested girl out on flaking for the 4rth time and trying really hard, and he is doing it out of neediness, while another guy could be just calling out someone harassing him to stand up for himself and preserve self respect it is not the action that is needy or not needy, it is the person who is needy or not needy, and the reason for why the action has been taken |
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