PUA Forum :: We're Dating, But Not In A Relationship?

I've been seeing this girl for about a month now. I'm completely confused what's going on. She texts me all the time, we hang out probably three times a week, we have a lot of sex and she seems really into me.

She was at my home once and my sister was there, "I don't want to meet your sister, thats way too personal." I know she sees other men, but I believe I'm the one she sees most and she also knows I see other women. I like her the best out of the other women I'm seeing. She always speaks about things quite openly with me, it's clear she likes me, she tells me shit that girlfriends would say, she tells me she thinks I'm incredibly sexy, intelligent, and interesting. I stay at her place alot, she stays at mine. But, it's like there's still this divide. Almost like she's afraid of the commitment and she talks about me like I'm just her friend whom she happens to sleep with.

The only thing that gives me the vibe that she does want a relationship with me is that she's told her friends about me, and in addition she brings me up when she says "other guys I've dated were bigger built like you, I've always like built guys." But then she withdrawls and says shit like "I don't want a serious relationship for another ten years!" and she'll call me out "You seem kind of like a manwhore, haha" but it's not like that and I don't know how to break it down to her without seeming beta.

I stay fairly aloof on the subject, but I don't know what to do to stay in a relationship with her. On one end, I feel like she wants to be in a relationship with her but she doesn't think I'm serious enough about our relationship, but on the other I feel like maybe she is serious about her independence. I feel like bringing this topic up bluntly will push her away, so I'm confused as to how to approach the matter.

Any suggestions?

Author:	OverThetop [ Tue Mar 27, 2012 12:11 am ]
Post subject:	We're Dating, But Not In A Relationship?
I've been seeing this girl for about a month now. I'm completely confused what's going on. She texts me all the time, we hang out probably three times a week, we have a lot of sex and she seems really into me. She was at my home once and my sister was there, "I don't want to meet your sister, thats way too personal." I know she sees other men, but I believe I'm the one she sees most and she also knows I see other women. I like her the best out of the other women I'm seeing. She always speaks about things quite openly with me, it's clear she likes me, she tells me shit that girlfriends would say, she tells me she thinks I'm incredibly sexy, intelligent, and interesting. I stay at her place alot, she stays at mine. But, it's like there's still this divide. Almost like she's afraid of the commitment and she talks about me like I'm just her friend whom she happens to sleep with. The only thing that gives me the vibe that she does want a relationship with me is that she's told her friends about me, and in addition she brings me up when she says "other guys I've dated were bigger built like you, I've always like built guys." But then she withdrawls and says shit like "I don't want a serious relationship for another ten years!" and she'll call me out "You seem kind of like a manwhore, haha" but it's not like that and I don't know how to break it down to her without seeming beta. I stay fairly aloof on the subject, but I don't know what to do to stay in a relationship with her. On one end, I feel like she wants to be in a relationship with her but she doesn't think I'm serious enough about our relationship, but on the other I feel like maybe she is serious about her independence. I feel like bringing this topic up bluntly will push her away, so I'm confused as to how to approach the matter. Any suggestions?

Author:	OverThetop [ Tue Mar 27, 2012 8:10 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: We're Dating, But Not In A Relationship?
Quote: I've been seeing this girl for about a month now. I'm completely confused what's going on. She texts me all the time, we hang out probably three times a week, we have a lot of sex and she seems really into me. She was at my home once and my sister was there, "I don't want to meet your sister, thats way too personal." I know she sees other men, but I believe I'm the one she sees most and she also knows I see other women. I like her the best out of the other women I'm seeing. She always speaks about things quite openly with me, it's clear she likes me, she tells me shit that girlfriends would say, she tells me she thinks I'm incredibly sexy, intelligent, and interesting. I stay at her place alot, she stays at mine. But, it's like there's still this divide. Almost like she's afraid of the commitment and she talks about me like I'm just her friend whom she happens to sleep with. The only thing that gives me the vibe that she does want a relationship with me is that she's told her friends about me, and in addition she brings me up when she says "other guys I've dated were bigger built like you, I've always like built guys." But then she withdrawls and says shit like "I don't want a serious relationship for another ten years!" and she'll call me out "You seem kind of like a manwhore, haha" but it's not like that and I don't know how to break it down to her without seeming beta. I stay fairly aloof on the subject, but I don't know what to do to stay in a relationship with her. On one end, I feel like she wants to be in a relationship with her but she doesn't think I'm serious enough about our relationship, but on the other I feel like maybe she is serious about her independence. I feel like bringing this topic up bluntly will push her away, so I'm confused as to how to approach the matter. Any suggestions? Just to add, I also noticed she's been seeing other dudes. She recently pointed out that I'm a bit of a "manwhore" in joking, but she's said it in other ways too. I'm confused what that even implies, but she said it. I don't know if that's a bad or good thing, I brought up the seeing other dudes because I feel like I might just be a box spring for her to jump off of into a better relationship/serious one.

Author:	Costa-T [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 2:39 am ]
Post subject:
From personal experience i can tell you that yeah she might seem to like you a lot but she wants to keep her options open, you don't know what she's been saying to her friends about other men right? You don't know what's been happening when you're not there. My advice is to continue being with her the way you are but don't get too attached to her in case she went for a relationship with someone else. There isn't much advice to give on you're situation because it's the girl's decision you just have to wait and see what happens but don't and never push her into a relationship because you'll just push her away!

Author:	OverThetop [ Wed Mar 28, 2012 4:13 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: From personal experience i can tell you that yeah she might seem to like you a lot but she wants to keep her options open, you don't know what she's been saying to her friends about other men right? You don't know what's been happening when you're not there. My advice is to continue being with her the way you are but don't get too attached to her in case she went for a relationship with someone else. There isn't much advice to give on you're situation because it's the girl's decision you just have to wait and see what happens but don't and never push her into a relationship because you'll just push her away! I just mean, I've slept with women who were simply just shallow connections and sort of friends with benefits sort of deals, but this chick I seem to vibe with incredibly well, and when I'm with her it's like she is my girlfriend. I feel like though I might have come across too strong, and been a bit too direct in how I handled things. But you know what, I think you're right sir. She's probably interested in me but is still playing the field. I guess I just have to keep reigniting that spark that I've done every single time with her and if it progresses well then it does, if not, then be it. Anyways, thank you a lot Mr. Costa-T for your words of wisdom, and I appreciate any other comments or opinions of course from any sirs who have them.

Author:	bigpoppaa [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 8:14 am ]
Post subject:
Look at it this way: worst comes to worst, you have a fuck buddy. Keep seeing other girls as well and try not to get attached.

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