PUA Forum :: I'm new to this game.

Quote:

I'm fairly concerned about exposing private information, however I know if anyone is going to accept me as comrade, it's going to be this community.

Without expressing too much detail, I'll describe myself. I'm young, intelligent, logical, a diamond in the rough. On the other hand, I'm small, introverted, socially awkward and to use that word that echoes dreadfully in my mind...a VIRGIN.

Where do we go from here?

BXH

I think one of the most difficult thing to do is reframe your sexuality. I think this is so difficult because society has been telling you most of your life that you should be ashamed of your own sexuality. SOCIETY IS WRONG. If you were raise primarily by women, as many of us were, this problem is compounded. You need to embrace your sexuality. You need to accept that you will have strong sexual desires, and you need to find healthy ways to address those desires.

Another thing I've had to do is reframe my violent tendencies. You may think you don't have any, but that's half of the problem. You are a man and you are prone to violence. If you don't acknowledge this, you will repress it. When you repress it, it comes out in other ways, such as hatred towards women. You need to accept that you will occasionally feel violent, and find healthy ways to vent those feelings as well. Sports, fitness, martial arts, or even some rough sex are all healthy ways to deal with these feelings.

In short, you need to accept who you are - all of it. It's very likely that you've been given the opposite message your entire life. This means it will probably be one of the most difficult things you will have to do.

Remember though, life is a journey, not a destination. It helps to have goals, but achieving your goals will never make you happy. You need to learn to enjoy the journey, or you will never be happy.

Author:	Beathoven [ Tue May 24, 2011 8:25 pm ]
Post subject:	I'm new to this game.
Hello all. I'm completely new. Recently I purchased 'The Game' and well, as with most of you, it's enticed me into the world of PUA. I need your help, your wise words, to guide me from being an USPFC (unbelievably sub-par frustrated chump) to becoming a pick up GOD. I look forward to your replies...BXH

Author:	jaminv [ Tue May 24, 2011 8:32 pm ]
Post subject:
I think by far the strongest materials I've read or seen are David DeAngelo's "On Becoming a Man" and 60 years of challenge's various writing about developing sexual tension. I highly recommend you check these out. It's hard to absord this material and not have it reframe the entire way you think. Frankly, I think "The Game" is one of the weakest materials on the source, although it is the doorway for many men into the world of self-improvement. Welcome. We're happy to have you.

Author:	Beathoven [ Tue May 24, 2011 8:45 pm ]
Post subject:
I'm fairly concerned about exposing private information, however I know if anyone is going to accept me as a comrade, it's going to be this community. Without expressing too much detail, I'll describe myself. I'm young, intelligent, logical, a diamond in the rough. On the other hand, I'm small, introverted, socially awkward and to use that word that echoes dreadfully in my mind...a VIRGIN. Where do we go from here? BXH

Author:	Lodewijkp [ Tue May 24, 2011 8:46 pm ]
Post subject:
welcome .... there is alot of material .. jaminv mensioned some already..... real social dynamics ( RSD ) are good materials as well.

Author:	jaminv [ Tue May 24, 2011 9:03 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: I'm fairly concerned about exposing private information, however I know if anyone is going to accept me as comrade, it's going to be this community. Without expressing too much detail, I'll describe myself. I'm young, intelligent, logical, a diamond in the rough. On the other hand, I'm small, introverted, socially awkward and to use that word that echoes dreadfully in my mind...a VIRGIN. Where do we go from here? BXH I think one of the most difficult thing to do is reframe your sexuality. I think this is so difficult because society has been telling you most of your life that you should be ashamed of your own sexuality. SOCIETY IS WRONG. If you were raise primarily by women, as many of us were, this problem is compounded. You need to embrace your sexuality. You need to accept that you will have strong sexual desires, and you need to find healthy ways to address those desires. Another thing I've had to do is reframe my violent tendencies. You may think you don't have any, but that's half of the problem. You are a man and you are prone to violence. If you don't acknowledge this, you will repress it. When you repress it, it comes out in other ways, such as hatred towards women. You need to accept that you will occasionally feel violent, and find healthy ways to vent those feelings as well. Sports, fitness, martial arts, or even some rough sex are all healthy ways to deal with these feelings. In short, you need to accept who you are - all of it. It's very likely that you've been given the opposite message your entire life. This means it will probably be one of the most difficult things you will have to do. Remember though, life is a journey, not a destination. It helps to have goals, but achieving your goals will never make you happy. You need to learn to enjoy the journey, or you will never be happy.

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Author:	Beathoven [ Tue May 24, 2011 9:11 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: I'm fairly concerned about exposing private information, however I know if anyone is going to accept me as comrade, it's going to be this community. Without expressing too much detail, I'll describe myself. I'm young, intelligent, logical, a diamond in the rough. On the other hand, I'm small, introverted, socially awkward and to use that word that echoes dreadfully in my mind...a VIRGIN. Where do we go from here? BXH I think one of the most difficult thing to do is reframe your sexuality. I think this is so difficult because society has been telling you most of your life that you should be ashamed of your own sexuality. SOCIETY IS WRONG. If you were raise primarily by women, as many of us were, this problem is compounded. You need to embrace your sexuality. You need to accept that you will have strong sexual desires, and you need to find healthy ways to address those desires. Another thing I've had to do is reframe my violent tendencies. You may think you don't have any, but that's half of the problem. You are a man and you are prone to violence. If you don't acknowledge this, you will repress it. When you repress it, it comes out in other ways, such as hatred towards women. You need to accept that you will occasionally feel violent, and find healthy ways to vent those feelings as well. Sports, fitness, martial arts, or even some rough sex are all healthy ways to deal with these feelings. In short, you need to accept who you are - all of it. It's very likely that you've been given the opposite message your entire life. This means it will probably be one of the most difficult things you will have to do. Remember though, life is a journey, not a destination. It helps to have goals, but achieving your goals will never make you happy. You need to learn to enjoy the journey, or you will never be happy. While I am new, and since you mentioned goals, I will outline my goal. It is late May. In September I will leave my hometown to start life afresh in a bustling city. In this city I will attend College/University. As a virgin in his late teens, my mind is consistently plagued with sexual propaganda. I MUST LOSE MY VIRGINITY IN THE NEXT 3 MONTHS. You will help me. And I cannot wait. BXH

Author:	Lodewijkp [ Tue May 24, 2011 9:16 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: I MUST LOSE MY VIRGINITY IN THE NEXT 3 MONTHS. you can lose your virginity in one day if you pay some hookers lol just set some goals .. study one hour of material everyday and approach at least one person everyday... that will be enough to get you on your way. also set relevant goals like : opening people by saying hi ... etc.. don't set your goal on fucking someone take it one step at a time.

Author:	Beathoven [ Tue May 24, 2011 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: I MUST LOSE MY VIRGINITY IN THE NEXT 3 MONTHS. you can lose your virginity in one day if you pay some hookers lol just set some goals .. study one hour of material everyday and approach at least one person everyday... that will be enough to get you on your way. also set relevant goals like : opening people by saying hi ... etc.. don't set your goal on fucking someone take it one step at a time. Right now, I need sleep. I have so much to learn it's daunting. I could really use a Mystery. If anyone has the spare few minutes, days, months. Then let me be your understudy. BXH

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