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| Here to smash my approach anxiety https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=84225 |
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| Author: | Royalflash [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 3:40 am ] |
| Post subject: | Here to smash my approach anxiety |
Hey everyone, here's the basics about me: Location: Midlands, UK Age: 22 How I got into "the game": I first heard about "the game" on the radio here in the UK when a PUA (can't remember who) was being interviewed and I thought "I want a piece of this". A few hours of Googling followed and I ordered "The Game" and "Rules Of The Game" soon after. How long have you been studying: Well I read the "The Game" before Christmas and told myself that in January I would begin changing my life. So I've studied for about a month so far. What methods would you like to use: I can't say exactly because I'm not experienced enough, I'm going to try as much as I can. Hobbies/Passions: Guitar, Music, Reading, History, Golf, Rock Climbing, Gym blah blah Goals: To increase my confidence and social proof. To meet and date as many new and interesting women as possible. Backstory: 2010 was the most boring unproductive year of my life so far. I achieved nothing, I hardly worked and didn't go out much. I got dumped by my GF but strangely I actually felt liberated because the relationship sucked and we had nothing in common. She was my first "serious" GF and it was definitely a case of oneitis when I look back on things. Anyway, I said to myself 2011 is going to be the year I change my life and do the things I've always wanted to do. I have bad approach anxiety and my first goal is to totally smash it and be able to approach anyone. I struggle to even say "hi" or ask for directions but I'm going to conquer and hopefully inspire a few other guys to beat their AA too. Well that's the basics, I look forward to posting on here. |
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| Author: | Jits138 [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 3:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Welcome, bro! There is a ton of stuff here on how to smash AA. My best advice is start super small. Start practicing openers and then get the hell outta there. after about 100 opens you won't feel anxiety but excitement. You also won't leave the door open for the big goofs that happen in the next couple stages so you won't build negative feelings on opening. Well that's my two cents and about what it's worth lol. |
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| Author: | Royalflash [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 4:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Welcome, bro! There is a ton of stuff here on how to smash AA. My best advice is start super small. Start practicing openers and then get the hell outta there. after about 100 opens you won't feel anxiety but excitement. You also won't leave the door open for the big goofs that happen in the next couple stages so you won't build negative feelings on opening. Well that's my two cents and about what it's worth lol.
Cheers man, every piece of advice counts that's why I'm here so I can learn from guys who are more experienced. As I get better I hope some people will be able to learn from my experiences too. I'd agree with starting super small because at this stage I need to start off with successes to build my confidence.
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| Author: | kasabi [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 4:16 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you're having problems with 'asking directions' or saying 'hello'. . . I'd suggest you work on that first. Just pack yourself a lunch, go to a random town and start asking for directions. You could make a funny game out of it. Samaritan: So you go up this street and take the second left. You: Oh, thanks so much. Just go up and take the 2nd right. Samaritan: No, no . . .second left. You: Take the second left after the second right? Oh I'm so lost. . . This would be funny . . . Any how, just start conversing at every opportunity. And keep a journal on you. This is why: You'll get in a situation where you think you'd like to get into a conversation but you might not follow through. This is OK! Really not a big deal. BUT . . . you must give it some thought after the situation passes and write in your journal. Maybe something like, "That girl/guy had an umbrella. I could have asked her, 'Oh, you checked the weather. It's going to rain this afternoon isn't it?" Here's what will happen. When you start, you will possibly WRITE a lot more than you INTERACT. But as you fill your journal, you will notice that you are able to write your 'ideas' a lot sooner after the situation ended. You will notice the lag between "end of situation" and "writing exercise" continue to shorten until you find yourself actually SAYING the things you planned to write. Eventually, you'll interact far more than you will write. This is a great way to start. |
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| Author: | Royalflash [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 4:31 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: If you're having problems with 'asking directions' or saying 'hello'. . . I'd suggest you work on that first. Just pack yourself a lunch, go to a random town and start asking for directions. You could make a funny game out of it.
That's the best advice I've read/heard so far. I love the idea of going to a random town because that way my interactions will be genuine and I won't be wandering around asking for directions to places I already know. I'm going to hop onto a train this Saturday and do this thing. For some reason it feels easier to ask for direction or advice in a different town to where I live. I'll keep a diary too. It'd be hilarous if I just stood there pretending to get misunderstand what the people are telling me haha. By the way, when I do this what section of the forum would be best post my story in?
Samaritan: So you go up this street and take the second left. You: Oh, thanks so much. Just go up and take the 2nd right. Samaritan: No, no . . .second left. You: Take the second left after the second right? Oh I'm so lost. . . This would be funny . . . Any how, just start conversing at every opportunity. And keep a journal on you. This is why: You'll get in a situation where you think you'd like to get into a conversation but you might not follow through. This is OK! Really not a big deal. BUT . . . you must give it some thought after the situation passes and write in your journal. Maybe something like, "That girl/guy had an umbrella. I could have asked her, 'Oh, you checked the weather. It's going to rain this afternoon isn't it?" Here's what will happen. When you start, you will possibly WRITE a lot more than you INTERACT. But as you fill your journal, you will notice that you are able to write your 'ideas' a lot sooner after the situation ended. You will notice the lag between "end of situation" and "writing exercise" continue to shorten until you find yourself actually SAYING the things you planned to write. Eventually, you'll interact far more than you will write. This is a great way to start. |
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| Author: | narcolepticpug [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 4:48 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
off topic but.. rock climbing is the best |
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| Author: | kasabi [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 5:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
*Not a diary... although you can keep one to organize all your notes later. Go get yourself one of those 'journalist pads' that go right into your shirt pocket. You want to do this exercise while everything is fresh on your mind. Did you understand the exercise that I suggested?dd |
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| Author: | Jits138 [ Fri Jan 28, 2011 5:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: If you're having problems with 'asking directions' or saying 'hello'. . . I'd suggest you work on that first. Just pack yourself a lunch, go to a random town and start asking for directions. You could make a funny game out of it.
Haha the infamous journal!!! converted?
Samaritan: So you go up this street and take the second left. You: Oh, thanks so much. Just go up and take the 2nd right. Samaritan: No, no . . .second left. You: Take the second left after the second right? Oh I'm so lost. . . This would be funny . . . Any how, just start conversing at every opportunity. And keep a journal on you. This is why: You'll get in a situation where you think you'd like to get into a conversation but you might not follow through. This is OK! Really not a big deal. BUT . . . you must give it some thought after the situation passes and write in your journal. Maybe something like, "That girl/guy had an umbrella. I could have asked her, 'Oh, you checked the weather. It's going to rain this afternoon isn't it?" Here's what will happen. When you start, you will possibly WRITE a lot more than you INTERACT. But as you fill your journal, you will notice that you are able to write your 'ideas' a lot sooner after the situation ended. You will notice the lag between "end of situation" and "writing exercise" continue to shorten until you find yourself actually SAYING the things you planned to write. Eventually, you'll interact far more than you will write. This is a great way to start. |
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