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| Wussying Out/ Journal Entry #2 https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=69834 |
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| Author: | collar50 [ Thu Jun 24, 2010 1:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | Wussying Out/ Journal Entry #2 |
Journal Entry #2 06/23/10 09:30:57 PM The extent to which I am bitching out is truly epic. I spent all day trying to psych myself up to go out to the bars tonight and talk to girls. I prepared a bit of an opener, though it isn't complete. I have the rough idea of a follow up story to tell. I spent an hour ironing all my clothes, I power washed my teeth, put on one small spray of cologne, I even did the breathing exercise to try to calm myself down. Then, I left my apartment and started to walk down to the strip. At first, there weren't a lot of people around. I was able to walk upright, calmly and slowly, eyes open, and even with a bit of a smile. But eventually, I make it to the strip. Some of the bars were empty, because it was still early. One, which has a promotion Wednesday nights, had quite a few people in there. Walking past people on the street, I slowly started to freak out. They all seemed to be wrapped up in their own conversations. They all seemed to be about 5 inches taller than me (Impossible seeing as I'm 5'10”, and I am wearing 1" heels). Everybody else was comfortable. I started sweating like Whitney Houston. My smile became a strained pseudo-smile. My throat got dry. My eyes started to burn. I ducked into a Walgreen's for a few minutes, thinking that I may be able to calm myself down and get control of my anxiety. I felt better for the few minutes, but then right back out. Yelling at myself, and feeling like sh** the whole time, I got off of the strip onto a back road and walked back to my apartment. And here I am, stewing in my own failure. I've got to go back out there, tonight, and I have to talk to at least a handful of girls. Even if they reject me before I can even get started, even if my eyes feel like they are going to burn out of my skull, even if I come off as a pathetic f***er to the 100 people in the crowded bar, I have to f***ing do it. F***. In round one, I never even got close to talking to a girl and I still felt petrified. I know they aren't super-beings, but that knowledge doesn't seem to help. Dammit, I'll re-post later tonight when I have actually done something. 09:49:49 PM |
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| Author: | collar50 [ Thu Jun 24, 2010 4:24 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
FYI: I put my third Journal Entry in the field report section, and that is where all of my subsequent journal entries will be. |
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| Author: | SomeBoodee [ Thu Jun 24, 2010 5:08 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
LOL Accordingly to my psychology class, you have social anxiety disorder. You need passive-relaxation treatement before you get anywhere. Visit your nearest psychologist, talk about social anxiety. Get on valium or something for the next month and actually start pua with that. Works wonders when you don`t actually give a fuck. |
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