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| Author: | 00Soul [ Wed Apr 08, 2009 7:18 am ] |
| Post subject: | Help please |
Hi, 00Soul here, Been out a few times with HB10 who is looking for LTR. There is a real connection between us but the sticking point is that she wants kids and I don't. She ends every evening we spend together with "I can't do this anymore" and then proceeds to dump me. After a few days its me who usually gets in touch and then things start up again with the usual outcome. Do I need to leave her alone? She is 42 and craves security. I'm 51. Any advice please fellas? |
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| Author: | fealinlucky [ Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Been out a few times with HB10 who is looking for LTR. There is a real connection between us but the sticking point is that she wants kids and I don't. She ends every evening we spend together with "I can't do this anymore" and then proceeds to dump me. After a few days its me who usually gets in touch and then things start up again with the usual outcome. Do I need to leave her alone? She is 42 and craves security. I'm 51. Any advice please fellas?
Soul,first off welcome to the forum... now into this... As i read over this i dont really see the problem here as a sticking point.... and honestly I think this is something your going to have to really, really sit down and think thru... Pick-up isnt really going to help you with this... the reason is this... CORE beliefs... in your CORE you dont want kids... enouph to drop the girl because of it... where as on her part, at her CORE she wants kids... enouph to drop you because of it. Honestly, I see nothing but problems with this issue... especailly in her case... she is 42.. if she wants kids she has like less than 2 years biologically to get it done... AT BEST.... it could all ready be too late, as most DR's dont like to see women over 40 pregnant. I would really truely sit down with her and hash this out, not with emotion but logical fact... if your truly into this girl... maybe even a counsler or mediator. and be prepared to accept the outcome and walk away if she cant be happy without kids or you can accept making an honest effort to have a baby together. I base this on a forward looking prediction. think about it like this... you get your way... LTR/married whatever... and dont have kids... and dont try, she will HATE you because of it, unless she comes to terms with this herself. As long as she has you to blame as an outlet for her anger and frustration, she will use it. as always, Just My Thoughts, Lucky |
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| Author: | 00Soul [ Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:38 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Many, many thanks for that. The last time I saw her was last week and it was me who said I wouldn't contact her. She knows all the pitfalls and I've suggested counselling and if I'm honest I suspect that the kids issue is a tiny, tiny part of the situation. I think the main issue is security (or, in the past, a lack of it). Should I bite the bullet and call her to thrash these issues out or simply leave it alone? Sorry to be a bore on this one but as I think you can tell, it means alot. |
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| Author: | 00Soul [ Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
[quote="00Soul"]Many, many thanks for that. The last time I saw her was last week and it was me who said I wouldn't contact her. She knows all the pitfalls and I've suggested counselling and if I'm honest I suspect that the kids issue is a tiny, tiny part of the situation. I think the main issue is security (or, in the past, a lack of it). Should I bite the bullet and call her to thrash these issues out or simply leave it alone? Sorry to be a bore on this one but as I think you can tell, it means alot.[/quote] I bit the bullet and called her. Was going to suggest marriage and kids. She ignored my call and then sent me a text which was downright nasty tbh. So its all over. Thanks Lucky. I'll be back. Roll on Friday... |
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| Author: | Commissar [ Thu Apr 09, 2009 4:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Hey,MAN! Don't take it as a BIG DEAL - there are 6 billion people in this planet! |
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| Author: | 00Soul [ Thu Apr 09, 2009 6:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Cheers guys. Gonna get back in the saddle asap. |
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