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Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently?
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Author:  NaiveRomanticChump [ Sun May 18, 2014 8:45 am ]
Post subject:  Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently?
Hi all,

Not sure if this is the right place for this post apologies in advance.

I cold approached this chic. We hit it off instantly, conversation was flowing, and when we parted we began texting for nearly the rest of the day.

I got to know more about the girl and I really began to like her as a person, the things she did, her view on life etc, we clicked on many things. I got the sense that she was really warming to me also. What was also nice was the growing sexual banter between us.

The following week we went out on a date. It was great. We spent the whole day together and had a great time. There was plenty of kino, and kissing hugging, and before she left I had the warmest snog I've had in a while. I definitely wanted to see her again.

Then she texted that she was nearing the end of her uni course and had loads to do. Her texts became more stressed out. I could understand that, the pressure of end of term uni work and all.

At this stage I want to add that a huge weakness in my game is an inability to back off and just be cool. We started off texting 24/7 and now its dried up to like 2 or 3 texts every other day and I always have to initiate these first. Part of me is telling myself this isn't a problem and she is genuinely busy. But the devil in my ear is saying that I'm losing her interest, shes going to drift off, text her immediately with something to re-hook her interest!

To make matters worse the sexual banter has seemed to evaporate! She actually texted me saying that she has had second thoughts and nothing sexual/relationship kind of thing is going to happen between us. However she did say that she likes chatting with me and wants to hang out when her uni stuff is out of the way. However I got a nagging suspicion that her 'uni stuff' is becoming her escape plan.

Now I'm confused. Has she lost interest in me? Have I lost value by not backing off and letting her have her space. Is this just some ASD? Am I in the dreaded friendzone. Or is she really saying, I like you, just be cool and when I'm ready we can get to know each again.

I really don't know what to do. I keep thinking of things to text her about, but then I don't because I feel like I'm bugging her and eventually she will get pissed off. Or I wonder if I should disappear for a few days and then text? But I have such little discipline when it comes to doing that technique!
Could somebody explain what might possibly be going on, and what the best thing for me to do?

I like this chic and definitely would to get a bit more involved with her.
Author:  Skylar B [ Sun May 18, 2014 10:41 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
Quote:
Hi all,

Not sure if this is the right place for this post apologies in advance.

I cold approached this chic. We hit it off instantly, conversation was flowing, and when we parted we began texting for nearly the rest of the day.

I got to know more about the girl and I really began to like her as a person, the things she did, her view on life etc, we clicked on many things. I got the sense that she was really warming to me also. What was also nice was the growing sexual banter between us.

The following week we went out on a date. It was great. We spent the whole day together and had a great time. There was plenty of kino, and kissing hugging, and before she left I had the warmest snog I've had in a while. I definitely wanted to see her again.

Then she texted that she was nearing the end of her uni course and had loads to do. Her texts became more stressed out. I could understand that, the pressure of end of term uni work and all.

At this stage I want to add that a huge weakness in my game is an inability to back off and just be cool. We started off texting 24/7 and now its dried up to like 2 or 3 texts every other day and I always have to initiate these first. Part of me is telling myself this isn't a problem and she is genuinely busy. But the devil in my ear is saying that I'm losing her interest, shes going to drift off, text her immediately with something to re-hook her interest!

To make matters worse the sexual banter has seemed to evaporate! She actually texted me saying that she has had second thoughts and nothing sexual/relationship kind of thing is going to happen between us. However she did say that she likes chatting with me and wants to hang out when her uni stuff is out of the way. However I got a nagging suspicion that her 'uni stuff' is becoming her escape plan.

Now I'm confused. Has she lost interest in me? Have I lost value by not backing off and letting her have her space. Is this just some ASD? Am I in the dreaded friendzone. Or is she really saying, I like you, just be cool and when I'm ready we can get to know each again.

I really don't know what to do. I keep thinking of things to text her about, but then I don't because I feel like I'm bugging her and eventually she will get pissed off. Or I wonder if I should disappear for a few days and then text? But I have such little discipline when it comes to doing that technique!
Could somebody explain what might possibly be going on, and what the best thing for me to do?

I like this chic and definitely would to get a bit more involved with her.
hey man, i would post this in general questions, admins do get frustrated when post stuff wrong subforum

also you will get a better response rate :)
Author:  real3d [ Sun May 18, 2014 6:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
most likely you over texted her, or said something that through her. thats why text in my opinion is stupid. when i kiss a girl my texts go fromalot to a few a day. they do what you did, freak out, think the lost value, try and regain it...and thats around about the time i get laid lol.

in future text less once youve kissed, keep it to a basic amount ,try to be less sexual over text.it gets creepy.

move on, shes gone in my opinion. you didnt have enough attraction built to justify the continued sexual banter and it got old fast. she said she doesnt want it to be sexual, shes formed that opinion. your done in my opinion.

take note. i text 4 or 5 girls at a time...stops the urge to freak out if they dont reply....
Author:  NaiveRomanticChump [ Mon May 19, 2014 7:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
yeah your probably right....moving on is probably the best thing to do...atleast it will stop me feeling like even more of a chump firing out texts to someone's who's gone cold.
Author:  NaiveRomanticChump [ Mon May 19, 2014 8:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
After spending the weekend feeling like a huge chump, pining over a chic who has lost interest in me I decicded to call it quits and move on.

Then as a final ditch attempt I decided to try a jealously routine. This chic is deep into the philosophy. She even has her own website. I sent her a text that said I showed a female colleague of mine her website and my colleague thinks its a load of garbage. Of-course none of this it true, but its a jealous routine I'm attempting.

Anyway this chic hadn't bothered to contact me for a while, but as soon as I sent that text guess what?? She replied not once but twice, first to curse my 'colleague' then to answer some questions she hadn't bothered answering before, and then to reaffirm her decision to hang out once uni stuff is over.

So I guess this means all is not lost. Maybe she just got bored of how easy it was to 'obtain' me in the first place. But this jealousy routine definitely stimulated her. Needless to say I didn't respond. I going to give it a few days, then continue on with this jealousy theme. Any other suggestions anyone?
Author:  gnr993 [ Fri May 30, 2014 12:42 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
welcome
Author:  NaiveRomanticChump [ Fri May 30, 2014 6:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
Wow! My attempts to woo this chic went from bad and nosedived to fucking worse!! I got so confused between what she was saying, and what I imagined her to be 'really' saying. Man it was so painful and I am so embarrassed. Things actually really degenerated and now any chance is absolutely over.

When I reflect on our date I realise that all I got was fools gold! I had no idea of all the subtle things that I should have been doing. I didn't create any lasting sensations within. And my texting game revealled neediness, impatience and a few other disgusting things not worth mentioning.

I'm a bit pissed of cos learning this game is so fucking hard. It requires so much commitment. I have to become somebody completely different to what I am. There are so many different facets to master. But because my game was dreadful I have lost the chance of sharing moments with an attractive interesting young lady. This has tipped me over the edge. There is no turning back. I have to master this game. And I have to do it while juggling all my other commitments. I want to go back to this chic and say sorry for that bullshit....but of-course I can't. So I'm plunging in...getting obsessive if I must....I have coined a phrase, something that perfectly captures what my kind of game will be.... I think when you read it you will understand exactly what I mean. Feel free to Use it.The phrase is at the end of this paragraph.
Author:  Animepic [ Sun Jun 01, 2014 4:07 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is there still interest or is she letting me down gently
I'm saying this as a woman: you should work with your sensitive nature. It's hot. My type is always the sexually-confident tall dark and handsome. The type I actually fall for, however, are the uber-sensitive boy next doors.

The way they usually get me, is by being upfront about their emotional side right away, and then flaking. It's such an old high school trick, but darn it if it doesn't work. You have to be sneaky about it, though, because it's such an old trick, and women can usually spot it from a mile away.

I would also suggest letting your emotions show, and then taking a step back from them, just for your own good. Plus, that gives you control.

If you completely ignore her for a long time, and then "run into" her half a year later, like on the way to class or something, and then just kind of act very friendly but over it, that might work. *shrugs* That's all I got.

Work with what you got.
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