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From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
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Author:  Aqualol [ Tue Sep 20, 2016 6:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Yes she does, not much, but it's enough for me.
Author:  HT23VWY67 [ Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
Yes she does, not much, but it's enough for me.
Maybe she's expecting more commitment from you before proceeding to shower you with her undivided attention.

Some people are of the mentality that, well, he or she might lose interest/bail out any time so I'll try to keep myself reserved before investing too much.
Author:  Aqualol [ Wed Sep 21, 2016 10:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
That's what I'm doing. Honestly speaking I don't want to feel like I chase her.

On monday I called her and we were enjoying a one hour conversation.

The day after I texted her a good morning with a selfie and then did my business all day.

She texted me again at 11 pm, chatted very little with her, but she was making close ended statements so I quickly lost interest. Today I have not texted her at all. She spends lots of time on FB, she's online all the time I go check my messenger, yet she won't text the guy she's dating.

I'm done contacting her and arranging dates the whole time. Either she shows more commitment or I'll move on.

I don't have a scarcity mentaliy, and in fact I got multiple women orbiting around. Enjoyed my time with her, would like to see her again, but it's not like we have all that intimacy or I feel so much in love.
Kind of bitter cause we had 3 amazing dates and she was awesome and seemed so interested and involved. But I don't like those rollercoasters of "omg you're so great aqualol, sleep with me tonight, don't go home, I never felt this way with a man I barely knew" to this cold and detached attitude between meetings (unless I initiate conversations or call her).
Author:  HT23VWY67 [ Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
That's what I'm doing. Honestly speaking I don't want to feel like I chase her.

On monday I called her and we were enjoying a one hour conversation.

The day after I texted her a good morning with a selfie and then did my business all day.

She texted me again at 11 pm, chatted very little with her, but she was making close ended statements so I quickly lost interest. Today I have not texted her at all. She spends lots of time on FB, she's online all the time I go check my messenger, yet she won't text the guy she's dating.

I'm done contacting her and arranging dates the whole time. Either she shows more commitment or I'll move on.

I don't have a scarcity mentaliy, and in fact I got multiple women orbiting around. Enjoyed my time with her, would like to see her again, but it's not like we have all that intimacy or I feel so much in love.
Kind of bitter cause we had 3 amazing dates and she was awesome and seemed so interested and involved. But I don't like those rollercoasters of "omg you're so great aqualol, sleep with me tonight, don't go home, I never felt this way with a man I barely knew" to this cold and detached attitude between meetings (unless I initiate conversations or call her).

She's just playing hard to get to see how much effort you'll put in for her aka how special she is for you.
Author:  Aqualol [ Wed Sep 21, 2016 5:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
I want to trust you.

I'm thinking of meeting her tomorrow for a coffee and asking her directly what are here expectations for this relationship, pointing out that I am not comfortable doing all the investment.
Author:  Aqualol [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 12:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Talked to her. She didn't want to seem needy and pushme away. Glad everything turned fine.
Author:  chi31fan35 [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 6:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
She's playing hard to get?!?!? I would feel suffocated if someone called me for an hour long conversation then texted me the next morning good morning. Especially after 4 dates.

You need something more to focus on in your life. You're not going to find happiness through this girl, no matter how great she is, how much she starts contacting you or how well she treats you.
Author:  Mr. Assertive [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 6:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
That's what I'm doing. Honestly speaking I don't want to feel like I chase her.

On monday I called her and we were enjoying a one hour conversation.

The day after I texted her a good morning with a selfie and then did my business all day.

She texted me again at 11 pm, chatted very little with her, but she was making close ended statements so I quickly lost interest. Today I have not texted her at all. She spends lots of time on FB, she's online all the time I go check my messenger, yet she won't text the guy she's dating.

I'm done contacting her and arranging dates the whole time. Either she shows more commitment or I'll move on.

I don't have a scarcity mentaliy, and in fact I got multiple women orbiting around. Enjoyed my time with her, would like to see her again, but it's not like we have all that intimacy or I feel so much in love.
Kind of bitter cause we had 3 amazing dates and she was awesome and seemed so interested and involved. But I don't like those rollercoasters of "omg you're so great aqualol, sleep with me tonight, don't go home, I never felt this way with a man I barely knew" to this cold and detached attitude between meetings (unless I initiate conversations or call her).
Damn bro 1 hour convo on the phone, i'd pretty much push for the meet after 10 minutes or at least told her I had to go because i had better things to do. You sound like the woman in this relationship :lol:. Texting her good morning, wanting her to show you commitment ? Come on...smh. You have oneitis for this girl and don't tell us you don't. You had 3 "amazing dates" and you're trying to lock it down already.


Have a life outside of dating and you will see your life improved. I haven't ever brought up being someones boyfriend or wanting commitment for the last 4 years and it's always been the chicks to push for commitment. You shouldn't play the part of the chick.
Author:  Aqualol [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 7:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
She's playing hard to get?!?!? I would feel suffocated if someone called me for an hour long conversation then texted me the next morning good morning.
The key word is you.

Quote:
You need something more to focus on in your life. You're not going to find happiness through this girl, no matter how great she is, how much she starts contacting you or how well she treats you.
I think you escalated way too much and judged way too much.
Author:  Aqualol [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 8:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
Damn bro 1 hour convo on the phone, i'd pretty much push for the meet after 10 minutes or at least told her I had to go because i had better things to do.
Some people enjoy talking. I have many friends which we have long phone calls. Having this happening once with a woman I started dating did not feel strange at all. But you're free to follow your rules, I'm free to follow mine.
Quote:
You sound like the woman in this relationship :lol:. Texting her good morning, wanting her to show you commitment ?
I agree, partially.
Quote:
Come on...smh. You have oneitis for this girl and don't tell us you don't. You had 3 "amazing dates" and you're trying to lock it down already.
No, I was tired of feeling like I had to initiate everything. Talk/setting dates, ecc.

if that was one of the many other girls, I would've agreed with you. But when I find somebody that I have much more fun and empathy than other 40+ women I had I kind of lose that usual strategies and get more natural.

Quote:
Have a life outside of dating and you will see your life improved. I haven't ever brought up being someones boyfriend or wanting commitment for the last 4 years and it's always been the chicks to push for commitment. You shouldn't play the part of the chick.
I do have a life outside of dating, I don't see why you came to such a conclusion.

You people should stick to what is said and posted rather than always feel like a smartass that know somebody's life, and mind you that I do the same mistake of yours.
Author:  Mr. Assertive [ Thu Sep 22, 2016 8:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
You're still the man- you will be the decision maker most of the time. Get used to it or start dating men.

Or women with masculine qualities
Author:  Aqualol [ Sun Oct 09, 2016 4:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Ok, 25 days later.

Pretty much nothing has changed. We still have very good time when we hang out (like once a week, once every 10 days). Gotta admit we're both very busy.

She keeps being pretty cold, and she does not show much interest to date (like, she never says "oh, I'd like to see you soon!").

She still keeps being amazing in person, and our dates go fuckin great and tend to be sexy and interesting. I should also say that she never, ever refused an invitation by me to hang out, ever. She always says yes.

Btw I started not texting/calling her pretty much at all. At least once a day she will text me, generally after dinner, just to ask how my day was. But she keeps being cold.

I'm very confused and nothing like this ever happened to me. I tried to tell her we should stop seeing each other one week ago, as I didn't feel that much connection and I was losing interest. Initially she said she agreed that we didn't have much compatibility (it's still so different in person..), but as the conversation progressed she kept trying to convince me we should still date. To me it really was something like she not wanting to get dumped, so tricking me back again, just so she could dump me at first occasion.

The funniest part is that our time together really is a blast, with her ending the dates begging me to sleep at her place, to not finish the date so early, and so on. What a fuckin rollercoaster.

I gotta say I still enjoy dating her, but I'm also dating different women and I don't really care much, I really removed the need for validation and I'm not acting needy anymore, but holy shit, isn't that woman a serious puzzle.

Thoughts?
Author:  JackZero [ Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
Thoughts?
It doesn't matter what our thoughts are. You dismiss them anyway.
Author:  Aqualol [ Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
It doesn't seem so from my previous posts, but whatever.
Author:  JackZero [ Sun Oct 09, 2016 5:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: From a couple of dates to relationship power struggle.
Quote:
It doesn't seem so from my previous posts, but whatever.
You should go reread the posts. Your problem is that you want to change this woman's way of expressing herself to satisfy your ego when you already getting her affection.
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