met amazing girl but she stop responding after first date



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 33 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Tools & Techniques of Game: Meeting, Attracting and Seducing Women » Closing and Day 2’s




Author Message
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 5:44 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
Ok here is my problem.

I have met this girl outside, I approached her and I got number from her. We were supposed to meet after one week when she comes back to town. I texted her on Monday if she is still interested to meet up; she agreed same evening and we went out. We had lovely long conversation at the bench in park and at the end she had to go in order to catch bus, so I kissed her and we made out very shortly. She broke it off because she said she couldn't do it while there are people around laughing. I asked her if I can see her again and she said sure I'll text you when I am free. We parted and I had quite odd feeling after, because she broke off the make out and the fact she said she will text me which put me in waiting position but I tried to shake it off and later at night I wrote to her I was glad to get to know her to which she responded that she really enjoyed time with me. I wrote back that we have to do it again. She agreed and said she might be free weekends. I asked whether she might be free Friday night, she said she is going out with a friend and weekend is better so I accepted but said I have to check whether I have free time, because friend is supposed to come to my place Saturday. She said she can wait than and I should go with friend. I wrote back that maybe my friend might come other time. She responded “if you say so”. After couple days I asked her out for second date on Saturday, to which she replied she is busy and Sunday is better. I asked if she can reschedule Saturday, but after I understood that she wants rather Sunday and I agreed on Sunday around 17:00. After few days I wrote to her what we can do on Sunday, since Friday and Saturday is usually out drinking; I suggested nice chill out outside, to which she replied sure alright but she will tell me for sure on Saturday if Sunday works for her but she will try her best. Well I started to feel she is pushing me to a maybe pile and losing interest so I asked whether our age difference is problem for her. She said its not a problem as long as I don't have serious relationship in mind. I asked whether she wants friends with benefits that, she asked if I want that. I said I don't have problem with it and I am the least jealous guy I know, and after little chat we agreed friends with benefits might work. So I proposed that she can come to my place to watch movie and chill out on Sunday. She said she will try and let me know Saturday. I agreed.

Saturday I couldn't take it anymore and I wrote to her
“So how do you see it ------ ? Do you have some time to meet up in center? :)
she didn't respond but received my message, at the end of day at Saturday I snapped and I wrote to her “------ I guess you are too busy to meet. It's ok I am busy as well. Maybe this just won't work if you are not that interested.”
I kinda regret that message because it was little negative but well damage is done and I felt like Sunday is not gonna happen. Sunday 16:45 (today when I wrote this post) she wrote to me
“It's okay I'm coming out today. I'll meet you in ---------- (totally other part of city and no reason for us to meet there) in 15 mins”. This message was I guess meant for someone else so I wrote “------ you sure you mean me? :) or was that for someone else? xD”
and after 10 min I wrote “I would gladly meet you but I can't right now and also that's for someone else :D. Text me when you change your mind and wanna meet up for sure:). No “maybe” dates any more. I am too busy to adjust for that.”
To which she didn't responded at all. I guess last messages I started to **** up.

I am not exactly sure what I did wrong as I had feeling the date went great and the kiss was good just didn't evolve fully. I am just guessing I have waited too long for the kiss, and that I was maybe texting too much after and accepting “maybe” dates but over all since I like her A LOT I felt she was being clear when she will be free. I guess I should have made more physical contact on the first date to create some stronger emotional connection. But than again if she was sure she is not into me she would rather ignore me and not pull my leg by responding and saying maybe she will meet me. I would like to ask whether there is chance to get her and what to do. I suppose I have to not contact her for some time. I just don't know for how long. I am afraid that whatever interest she has it might go down if I don't keep contact, but than again I know I can't raise any interest by text/call so I guess my only chance is to wait and see if she contacts me. What do you think I did wrong or what I should done differently? I also want to ask if it is ok to call her later on if she doesn't contact me. That could show I am not afraid to call her since we just texted so far and just simply say “I still think you are sexy and by the kiss I can tell you are very passionate in sex so are you still interested to meet up?” or something similar and insist only on exact date and exact answer otherwise I don't agree.

if it helps she is very hot 18yo girl with rock style clothes, piercing in nose, she skateboards a lot and goes to parties and clubs a lot, she said she is very sexual and had sex since 14,5 yo and she is terrible in relationship that's why she wants more like friends with benefits. But she is very nice and kind to everyone. and the reason why I like her is that she is extremely cool in attitude, I mean chilled, totally different from girls, she is living alone because her dad died when she was child and her mom left country far away for work. she tried every kind of drugs but she doesn't seem like addict at all.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 6:02 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
You are pushing at her when she wants a FWB type of relationship.

When you call one of your friend's to say you're going to hang out and they say they are busy, do you push at them for another day? I'm guessing the answer would be no.

Girls like this aren't a call and schedule a date type of girl. This type of girl you call that day and say "come hang out tonight" and you don't have to take her anywhere.

You are basically trying fit a square peg in a round hole.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 6:51 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
Ok. I don't feel good after that summary. Because it just means I totally fucked up and had no idea what to do. But i do appriciate your help. If you are right, which you very likely might be can you advice me what i should have done instead ? And please what i should do now? With examples if possible. So I can understand.

I have meanwhile another fwb with other girl and whenever we want to meet I also usually ask when she is free, but this girl gives me exact date and I am sure she comes... I believe you can be that relaxed only after you establish that first sex and if she wants to repeat it you just booty call. But I need to know date in advance since I might have plans or she has plans already.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 7:33 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
I'm not sure if I can break it down more than what I did, but I'm going to try.
Quote:
Well I started to feel she is pushing me to a maybe pile and losing interest so I asked whether our age difference is problem for her. She said its not a problem as long as I don't have serious relationship in mind.
This was the first clue for me of what this girl was about. She's telling you up front that she wasn't in it for the serious relationship but she'll still see you.
Quote:
I texted her on Monday if she is still interested to meet up; she agreed same evening and we went out. We had lovely long conversation at the bench in park and at the end she had to go in order to catch bus, so I kissed her and we made out very shortly. She broke it off because she said she couldn't do it while there are people around laughing.
Clue number #2. You called her that day and hung out that day. She was willing to make out with you, but felt uncomfortable doing it in public.
Quote:
she said she is very sexual and had sex since 14,5 yo and she is terrible in relationship that's why she wants more like friends with benefits.
Clue #3. She tells you exactly what she's comfortable with.

If it were me, I would have kind of ignored her weekend response. If I had a day during the week that I was free, I would have invited her over because I was free that day. If she refused, I would have said okay and went about my business if she didn't offer a replacement day...but there is no way that I would have gotten into a "how about this day...okay this day...no this day" conversation. I would have waited until my next free day and called her then.

Here's the thing. Something worked for you. Then you started to deviate from what worked so you wouldn't lose her. How I read it, it came across like you were displaying a clingy personality that is pushing this girl in the direction of a relationship and she is sensing that.
Quote:
I believe you can be that relaxed only after you establish that first sex and if she wants to repeat it you just booty call. But I need to know date in advance since I might have plans or she has plans already.
This is rigid thinking, IMO...but if that's what you need, I can't help you with that.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 7:41 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
Ok I think I understand and I think you are right. I do like her a lot and I think biggest issue was that I was too much into her.
Thank you that you explained it in more detail.
Now do you think I still have a chance if I do it your way? Say, i ll just call some time in future, say that i am free come hang out, no strings attached? Or what would you do to give it best chance? After all i am still kinda new to fwb. With the other girl I don't have much interest so that's why I guess it worked.


Last edited by Gally on Mon May 18, 2015 7:21 am, edited 1 time in total.

Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 7:49 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Quote:
Ok I think I understand and I think you are right. I do like her a lot and I think biggest issue was that I was too much into her.
Thank you that you explained it in more detail.
Now do you think I still have a chance if I do it your way? Say, i ll just call some time in future, say that i am free come hang out, no strings attached? Or what would you do to give it best chance? After all i am still kinda new to bfw. With the other girl I don't have much interest so that's why I guess it worked.
There's always a chance. I would do exactly like you just said, but leave out the "no strings attached" statement. She'll say yes or she'll say no, but don't get caught up in this one girl. They're all great in the beginning.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 7:59 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
Alright. Shouldnt I try to add something to explain i dont want to be in relationahip?

Thank you again for your help. I all report back how it went.

If someone else wants to add their insight into this I would appreciate it.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 8:06 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Explaining yourself is justifying yourself. If you're justifying yourself you are trying to convince her to hang out with you, you are essentially putting her in a power position. She already holds the power over you currently...why give her more power?

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 8:28 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
That makes sense.
So just simple call or perhaps better yet just text saying that I am free and come hang out. Or should I add some fun to it. Like "you! me! Shots! Music! Maybe my place tonight? :)"

When i have met the girl I said to friend this is not going to work well for me cause i like her too much already ( first time happened to me I wanted someone so much just after first approach) I couldn't help it. After talking during first date I fell even harder for her... But still am ok with just sex from time to time since I don't want relationship. I think she would be best experience for me to learn more what I want. I have to learn how to relax it. But it's hard when I want something :) ...


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 8:49 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Quote:
So just simple call or perhaps better yet just text saying that I am free and come hang out. Or should I add some fun to it. Like "you! me! Shots! Music! Maybe my place tonight? "
If that is the way that you presented yourself from the start, that's how you say it. IMO, your goal is to be the guy that she was initially attracted to.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 9:06 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
Well I presented myself in more like " if you are still interested do you wanna hang out sometime?" kinda way. But since we established bfw I had an idea to do it more funnier. I guess I get your point to stick to what worked at first.

But when I am relaxed I am usually very funny so I was told many times.

And yes you are right I should wait till she starts to be attracted to me before I let myself fall for her. I Definitely learnt a lot from this experience. And now not many girls compare to her so it will be easier, I hope.


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon May 18, 2015 7:19 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2015 3:20 pm
Posts: 14
I have another question. What to do when girl says maybe she will be free, or “we'll see”? Do you insist either on exact date, saying you have to know in order to adjust your plans, or that you will not make free time for “maybe”. Or do you just agree on it hoping she will be free eventually?

From my experience with “maybe”, or “we'll see” always means no. And therefore I thought it's better to ask her to make decision or make it clear you are not going to hang around. Therefore she might think of you that its rare opportunity with you and you will cut through bullshit. I never though think about it that much before, in my experience when I wanted exact date I did it naturally because I was really busy and I think it worked maybe those times.

Anyway I understand that first date or interaction before is most important to impact whether the girl will go on date with you and you shouldn't cling on it or think too much about it. But let's think in damage control way.

Here is source of what I am trying to understand:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9F6T0-F_Pg


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 12 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link