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F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

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Neverknowsbest
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F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by Neverknowsbest » Wed Sep 27, 2017 2:31 am

Hey all! Never Here,

Today's Topic is on F closing and why in my opinion, research and experience. F closing sooner is better.

The working theory. "Woman will give you more time of day after you have had sex with them."

"But NKB this doesn't make sense!"

IT DOES! HERE'S WHY!

First off woman are far more socially intelligent in general than we are. They generally can read the room, and often are concerned with how their friends and family will see them. So let's take a scenario that has happened to me twice this year;

You are in a club/bar/etc. You find yourself making out with some woman. Numbers are exchanged, but she doesn't respond to messages. Why is that? Simply put, Social pressure and for multiple reason too.

A. Chances are you all made out passionately. And now the next step logically will be sex. but by now she has had time to think, and doesn't want to be the girl who slept with the guy she met the other day. No matter how seductive the experience. The seductive qualities don't carry over the same in black and white text. Most seduction is non verbal

B. She would have had a chance to talk it over and her friends family label you as a "player/playboy" type.
Obviously how else did you make out with her?

C. She could be looking for something more meanigful, and hooking up/dating the guy at the bar they just met might seem to much too fast.

Now Imagined that you two had sex the night in question. The night the passion was there. Before she can second guess it.

A It takes TONS of pressure off her. Because it's already happened. (Most people prefer asking forgivness than permission) In her head she can see it as, adventurous, and spur of the moment.

B As my mentor says "Men use love for sex. Women use sex for love" Chances are that if you are in a sexual relationship with a woman. She is having sex with you with some expectation this could possibly be a recurring thing.

In PUA there is the theory that; most people know in 5 minutes whether you would, or wouldnt have sex with someone. I say thats half true. Most times a person knows in 5 minutes if you WOULDN'T have sex with someone. So the longer you wait, the more the chance of being crossed off the list.

So don't wait to be crossed off. Make the list.

Cheers
Never Knows Best

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JackZero
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by JackZero » Wed Sep 27, 2017 3:58 am

Neverknowsbest wrote:First off woman are far more socially intelligent in general than we are.
We have a couple of guys on the forum that tend to say this but never get into the details of why they say it. Maybe you can expand on this thought.

Neverknowsbest
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by Neverknowsbest » Wed Sep 27, 2017 4:40 am

JackZero wrote:
Neverknowsbest wrote:First off woman are far more socially intelligent in general than we are.
We have a couple of guys on the forum that tend to say this but never get into the details of why they say it. Maybe you can expand on this thought.
It is a touch of a generalization, however there rings truth to it. If you think about it, they growing up are expected to be more social than men. I can't give a complete breakdown of this as I am not a sociologist. I am merely drawing from experiences. I have met men that are amazingly socially aware. However I find most men aren't. Whereas I find more women to pick up on subtle social cues.

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JackZero
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by JackZero » Wed Sep 27, 2017 5:12 am

Neverknowsbest wrote:It is a touch of a generalization, however there rings truth to it. If you think about it, they growing up are expected to be more social than men. I can't give a complete breakdown of this as I am not a sociologist. I am merely drawing from experiences. I have met men that are amazingly socially aware. However I find most men aren't. Whereas I find more women to pick up on subtle social cues.
I'm not aware of the expectation of women to be more social than men. I actually don't think it's true. However, I do believe that they socialize differently.

From a pickup perspective, women tend to be more social because they are normally the ones being approached as opposed to approaching. They have the option to accept or reject an approach. Since they don't have much to lose in a social setting they get to operate with the mentality of having nothing to lose. Men on the other hand don't have that same luxury because we approach. Most guys are self conscious about approaching so it may seem like they are socially inferior to a woman but put the man in an environment where he is in the position to demand respect, that guy becomes the most socially accepted person in the room.

Where I'm going with this is that "women are far more socially intelligent than men" type of thinking gives guys more reason to be afraid of women when the entire premise isn't really true because even the hot ones can be awkward once you peel them away from their group. If you carry yourself well, can be charming, and get your intent out there, you'll get women to follow your lead. Just don't be one of those guys that put on fronts of what they think the girl wants because they'll see through that and then you'll look like a social idiot.

Other than that...great post.

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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by Neverknowsbest » Wed Sep 27, 2017 5:19 am

JackZero wrote:
Neverknowsbest wrote:It is a touch of a generalization, however there rings truth to it. If you think about it, they growing up are expected to be more social than men. I can't give a complete breakdown of this as I am not a sociologist. I am merely drawing from experiences. I have met men that are amazingly socially aware. However I find most men aren't. Whereas I find more women to pick up on subtle social cues.
I'm not aware of the expectation of women to be more social than men. I actually don't think it's true. However, I do believe that they socialize differently.

From a pickup perspective, women tend to be more social because they are normally the ones being approached as opposed to approaching. They have the option to accept or reject an approach. Since they don't have much to lose in a social setting they get to operate with the mentality of having nothing to lose. Men on the other hand don't have that same luxury because we approach. Most guys are self conscious about approaching so it may seem like they are socially inferior to a woman but put the man in an environment where he is in the position to demand respect, that guy becomes the most socially accepted person in the room.


Where I'm going with this is that "women are far more socially intelligent than men" type of thinking gives guys more reason to be afraid of women when the entire premise isn't really true because even the hot ones can be awkward once you peel them away from their group. If you carry yourself well, can be charming, and get your intent out there, you'll get women to follow your lead. Just don't be one of those guys that put on fronts of what they think the girl wants because they'll see through that and then you'll look like a social idiot.
Hmmmm.... I'll have to think on this. I mean. Yeah most people are awkward. but the point of this wasn't based on woman being more socially intelligent. It was a factor in the post, the biggest thing I was trying to make here was how the social pressure could make a woman who wants to sleep with you not want to. Even though she wants to. She doesnt want to be know as "that girl"

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JackZero
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by JackZero » Wed Sep 27, 2017 5:23 am

Neverknowsbest wrote:
JackZero wrote:
Neverknowsbest wrote:It is a touch of a generalization, however there rings truth to it. If you think about it, they growing up are expected to be more social than men. I can't give a complete breakdown of this as I am not a sociologist. I am merely drawing from experiences. I have met men that are amazingly socially aware. However I find most men aren't. Whereas I find more women to pick up on subtle social cues.
I'm not aware of the expectation of women to be more social than men. I actually don't think it's true. However, I do believe that they socialize differently.

From a pickup perspective, women tend to be more social because they are normally the ones being approached as opposed to approaching. They have the option to accept or reject an approach. Since they don't have much to lose in a social setting they get to operate with the mentality of having nothing to lose. Men on the other hand don't have that same luxury because we approach. Most guys are self conscious about approaching so it may seem like they are socially inferior to a woman but put the man in an environment where he is in the position to demand respect, that guy becomes the most socially accepted person in the room.


Where I'm going with this is that "women are far more socially intelligent than men" type of thinking gives guys more reason to be afraid of women when the entire premise isn't really true because even the hot ones can be awkward once you peel them away from their group. If you carry yourself well, can be charming, and get your intent out there, you'll get women to follow your lead. Just don't be one of those guys that put on fronts of what they think the girl wants because they'll see through that and then you'll look like a social idiot.
Hmmmm.... I'll have to think on this. I mean. Yeah most people are awkward. but the point of this wasn't based on woman being more socially intelligent. It was a factor in the post, the biggest thing I was trying to make here was how the social pressure could make a woman who wants to sleep with you not want to. Even though she wants to. She doesnt want to be know as "that girl"
Yeah...I came back and edited what I said to point out that this was a great post. I just have an issue when guys elevate women above themselves, but I do realize that wasn't the foundation of your thinking in this post.

Neverknowsbest
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by Neverknowsbest » Wed Sep 27, 2017 2:11 pm

Yeah I feel ya. Now days I just think as women as people. They have flaws and quirks like guys . I used to get real nervous when opening sets. Now I'm more comfortable. I think there is a small difference in the way the races communicate. For example I have a younger sister. Some of the ways she communicated with her friends were worlds apart from how guys talk. Like it's more filled with undertones and subtext. Guys are more direct usually, whereas most women tend to be more subtle. I think this is especially true with women who went to public school. The social SPAM is like a battleground for some young women. Who's dating who. Who betrayed who, who likes who, they aren't friends anymore because some guy they both like. Guys don't go through as many social interactions in my personal opinion.

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oceanx
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by oceanx » Sun Oct 01, 2017 3:20 pm

Since they don't have much to lose in a social setting they get to operate with the mentality of having nothing to lose. Men on the other hand don't have that same luxury because we approach.
Jack laying out the keys to the kingdom to any guy willing to read them (calling the 30 non regulars who view this per week at this point lol). A guy needs to operate with the mentality that he has absolutely nothing to lose. Because he doesn't.

chi31fan35
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by chi31fan35 » Sun Oct 08, 2017 5:20 pm

Women have 12 to 16 areas of the brain meant for communication while men have 4 to 6 areas of the brain meant for communication. Women also score much higher in EQ tests (emotional quotient) and have a narrower range of IQ (they are less likely to be developmentally disabled but also less likely to be geniuses.) The fact that they have more estrogen causes them to form closer, tight knit bonds and also makes them more sensitive to other emotions. The average woman can read a social situation much faster and quicker than most men can.

Men who work in professions like teaching, nurses, waiters, bartenders, sales, etc. where some sort of communicative care is going on are the only ones who can match women when it comes to this. All of this is backed up by numerous psychological and biological research.

So yes, women in general are far better at reading people than men.

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JackZero
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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by JackZero » Sun Oct 08, 2017 9:08 pm

chi31fan35 wrote:Men who work in professions like teaching, nurses, waiters, bartenders, sales, etc. where some sort of communicative care is going on are the only ones who can match women when it comes to this. All of this is backed up by numerous psychological and biological research.
Let's take a look at what you are saying here. Men can learn to be just as socially aware as women just by being social.

Women can read the social situation because their role is different than that of a man. Their role requires more reward than risk...so they do better. Most men don't want to do the man's role in social interactions with women because there is more risk than reward. Most men fear being judged, rejected, and failure to get the women that they want. All of the jobs that you listed above require the man to do their job to get better. If you want to do better with women, you have to put in the effort. If you put in the effort you'll be just as good as any woman at reading the social situation, if not better.

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Re: F CLOSE. Is sooner better?

Post by chi31fan35 » Mon Oct 09, 2017 2:13 am

Eh, I agree to an extent Jackzero. The problem is there is self selection in these jobs, as men who are better at reading social situations will naturally gravitate toward them. I do agree (obviously since I am here) that there is room for growth for anyone, especially men who are often socialized not to learn these dynamics. But there is also a biological and physiological component that should not be dismissed.

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