Why does the PUA industry claim that LOOKS don't matter??



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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 9:04 am 
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Before I make my post, I'll firstly introduce myself, I am an older guy (I am in my 40's), and have never really had any luck with women. I am not a virgin, and my only sex with women has been with hookers. Unfortunately my race and ugly looks have written me off in the dating game, but that's life, and before you accuse me of being too picky, I rarely approach hot looking women as they are out of my league, and they would reject me instantly. I have approached about 200 odd women in my lifetime, but I have given up, and have resigned myself to dying alone.

Anyway, the reason I am making the post is because I am seriously challenging this idea from the PUA industry that looks don't matter when it comes to attraction, because in my experience LOOKS is the major thing women go for, followed closely by money,fame and bad boy personna.

To qualify the above, why is it that in virtually every social situation I have observed where men and women interact, the best looking guys would end up picking up the girl without fail. Sure there are exceptions to this, and the odd ugly guy may get lucky, but for the most part if you don't pass the looks test with a woman, it's GAME OVER, and no amount of game or any other of that PUA quackery will change her mind.

I will probably get banned for this post, but fuck it, I can discredit PUA teachings and the whole PUA industry so easily it's not even funny, and no I am not a troll, I am deadly serious.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 10:06 am 
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My post on why race/age/looks matter would discredit the entirety of this useless fucking post. But in reality, please realize you have a bleak fucking view on life and it's sad to see someone in their 40s resigned to dying alone and having such weak inner game/bitching evangelically about the myth of pickup.

It's clear your nature vs nurture experiences has subjugated you into believing the guys with the GOOD looks are the ones who get the girl and game does not matter. The reality is this: looks do matter but truly not as much as you think it does and definitely not as much for every girl or in the same way. The reality is I believe there's a baseline level of pass ability to be in the dating scene. If you are a burn victim, fat 400 lbs man, or a 2 ft midget, then you won't have any problem in the dating world.

The fact is some of my friends are aspiring actors, models, actual celebrities, and guys who resemble a good looking male. In general, yes they have it easier but realistically looks are very subjective...i know some girls that truly think brad Pitt is ugly. What would you say to that? Probably bullshit, but ur dead set on a conviction of limiting belief that has destroyed you.

We don't ban people here, but we can pity them. Hopefully you realize I have just seen too many examples of men that get with high caliber women (note I'm one of them) without money, cars, looks, etc. Obviously I have baseline values of money to sustain myself, clothing, decent haircut and the looks are decent but I'm not going to be high ego and say just because I'm a model I'm a fucking creme de la creme. P.s. fame only opens sets and yes it can help you fuck any girl you wanted but don't be a retard and think there aren't women who may not be with a wife beater celebrity or any celebrity and look no farther than an actual personality. Some do, some don't. You are categorizing all women.

Get real OP. Seek fucking help than trying to blame pick up for your lack of wisdom, Yoda....please. Don't insult that green midget


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 11:36 am 
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I rarely approach hot looking women as they are out of my league, and they would reject me instantly.
As long as you continue to believe this, it will continue to be true.

My opinion? You're paying too much attention to how attractive other guys in the room are and not enough attention to the beautiful ladies you claim to desire.

Your boy,
870

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 11:56 am 
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I just think you're looking for excuses to blame anything on your failings but yourself, and you'll even blame your genetics to do so. So unless you do actually look like Yoda in being 3 ft tall, green and hairy, You should man up and approach more. 200 approaches in your entire life, when you're 40 isn't good enough at all. Maybe now because you're 40, club game isn't the best place anymore for you, but you should still go and try to just socialise as you obviously are socially inept which you need to get over. Why don't you join some local clubs where there will be women your age to improve your confidence and learn some new skills? Time is running out for all of us my friend, and unless you really do put yourself out there, you are going to die alone just like the rest of us would. That's a fact of life which has been the same since our species first began.
'You can't change the cards dealt, just the way you play the hand'
Regards
-Wilso

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:14 pm 
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This is just nice encouraging-motivational slogan, looks matter but its not the only thing. What they mean is - you can oick up some girls even if you don't have looks by improving other aspects of yourself. Plus you can improve your looks by taking care of your body and dressing classy.

As for your race comment, I do not understand, are not there any women of your race where you live that you say it was a disadvantage for you?


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:33 pm 
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I think its interesting to get a perspective from an older man who was supposedly tried and failed for so long.

I can see how many many young men today could go decades without success with women like the OP has.

I know for a fact that me personally, struggled big time for like 7 years before I discovered PUA.

And my looks are above average.

I dunno I think looks matter to a degree but you have to kind of aim for whats in your range.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 1:58 pm 
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in the sense of looks subjectively being of relevance from a person to person standpoint when considering a person for a sexual partner, yes they matter, but really in the end it is subjective, talk to enough chicks, eventually there will be girls who like the way you look, don't like the way you look, and are indifferent to the way you look, it is subjective, but the more you improve your appearance the better, so really it is sort of irrelevant if you are good looking or not, confidence can easily get a guy further then looks, but looks sure do help

why the community commonly preaches looks don't matter??, well there are a few ways to play with this, it can be seen as simply a marketing ploy to lure more desperate guys in, or you can see it as a sort of truth in the sense that, yes looks are fairly irrelevant, women are fairly picky and you can suspect a good looking guy will get rejected alot just like an ugly guy, really just depends who wants it more, yes good looks help and they get you interest, but interest doesn't close the deal, and if you can't just go through the motions and create the logistics for sex to happen then actually go through with making it happen, it simply won't happen, there is no magic moment, good looks won't fix the fear of approach, and it won't fix a fear of rejection, and it certainly won't help a guy figure out what he is looking for, if he can't tell you then how can expect to accomplish what he wants? looks won't make you interesting to talk to, or smooth and touching, it won't keep your body language tight, looks won't make you calm around that amazingly tight hb10 tittie shot model chick that is trying to sit in your lap and work you for a tip, looks will not effect your skill, more interest, but without the skill, you will still will not be able to live up to your potential, not to mention good looking guys have a whole set of other asd related issues to deal with

so all in all, who gets laid more?, the ugly guy who goes out and approaches for hours and hours a day, talking to hundreds of girls a day, getting better and better at it the more he gets rejected and tests his limits, or the good looking guy, who talks to 2 girls that approach him a month, and when he gets rejected he shys away from revealing his intentions further and develops further irrational beliefs to support reasons why not to approach and why not to risk rejection, just a completely weird view, he will probably come up with any reason why he isn't good enough, maybe it's his race, or he says hes ugly, or too skinny, too fat, too short, hes too shy, he can't approach, he can't touch, he can't kiss, what ever it is, some sort of random ''I cant pops up'' that holds him back, it's a limiting belief, so think about it, who would you say will get laid more often?, the guy who talks to 24 chicks a year, or the guy who talks to thousands, the guy who has no idea of how to have a conversation or get a chick out and escalate things to sex?, or the guy that does know how to do that?

^ with all that in mind, what if the ugly guy does all that and starts going to the gym every day while improving his whole game plan? how much do looks matter in this situation?

and finally the last way in which ''looks don't matter'' is in the sense that genetic ''looks'' are not nearly as important to women as they are to men, in the sense of ''pretty boy'' and good looking handsome guy, fitness is more of a focus, and body image, you can be fairly ''ugly'' but have an amazing ripped perfect body and a few tatoos and you are the next sex symbol bad boy type, and the once ''ugly face'' = ''manly face'', you see how that works?, image is more important then ''looks'', a handsome guy who dresses like shit with average raggy clothes, will easily be seen as less attractive, it's just like girls who wear crappy clothes and no makes up, if you don't have a sharp congruent image then you will be lacking in your potential, playing to a neiche can also help you attract a neiche, but all in all finding a style that is your own and congruent is a good idea


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:17 pm 
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My post on why race/age/looks matter would discredit the entirety of this useless fucking post. But in reality, please realize you have a bleak fucking view on life and it's sad to see someone in their 40s resigned to dying alone and having such weak inner game/bitching evangelically about the myth of pickup.

It's clear your nature vs nurture experiences has subjugated you into believing the guys with the GOOD looks are the ones who get the girl and game does not matter. The reality is this: looks do matter but truly not as much as you think it does and definitely not as much for every girl or in the same way. The reality is I believe there's a baseline level of pass ability to be in the dating scene. If you are a burn victim, fat 400 lbs man, or a 2 ft midget, then you won't have any problem in the dating world.

The fact is some of my friends are aspiring actors, models, actual celebrities, and guys who resemble a good looking male. In general, yes they have it easier but realistically looks are very subjective...i know some girls that truly think brad Pitt is ugly. What would you say to that? Probably bullshit, but ur dead set on a conviction of limiting belief that has destroyed you.

We don't ban people here, but we can pity them. Hopefully you realize I have just seen too many examples of men that get with high caliber women (note I'm one of them) without money, cars, looks, etc. Obviously I have baseline values of money to sustain myself, clothing, decent haircut and the looks are decent but I'm not going to be high ego and say just because I'm a model I'm a fucking creme de la creme. P.s. fame only opens sets and yes it can help you fuck any girl you wanted but don't be a retard and think there aren't women who may not be with a wife beater celebrity or any celebrity and look no farther than an actual personality. Some do, some don't. You are categorizing all women.

Get real OP. Seek fucking help than trying to blame pick up for your lack of wisdom, Yoda....please. Don't insult that green midget

For your information, I am not a burn victim, a 2ft midget and I definitely don't weigh 400lbs, I am 5'7 tall, weigh around 74kg (163lbs), and I go the gym 6 days a week, plus I play soccer, so I am better shape than most men my age who are usually very overweight or obese. However I am bald (I shave my head), and although I am an Italian Australian, I mistaken for an Arab, and I know for a fact women despise Arab looking men.

If you are a model, then why did you turn to the PUA community/industry?, your looks alone would guarantee you success with women.

I find extremely hard to believe that any woman would find Brad Pitt ugly given how ultra picky modern women are these days.

What exactly is this "inner game"?, and perhaps I do have a bleak view of the world but that's because I have approached women only to be greeted with "instant fuck off signals", dirty looks and the silent SPAM. And before you accuse me of being too picky, I rarely if ever approach hot looking women, as they are completely out of my league, in the past I have only approached average to moderately attractive women.

I have experimented with some PUA material, but I would never waste my money on any of those ridiculous boot camps, and what I discovered is that at best PUA material may make women slightly intrigued by you, but not attracted, there is a difference.

How did I "fail" at pick up, when the dating game is systematically rigged against ugly dudes like me?


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:31 pm 
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I think its interesting to get a perspective from an older man who was supposedly tried and failed for so long.

I can see how many many young men today could go decades without success with women like the OP has.

I know for a fact that me personally, struggled big time for like 7 years before I discovered PUA.

And my looks are above average.

I dunno I think looks matter to a degree but you have to kind of aim for whats in your range.
Firstly, I am not encouraging any man (irrespective of age), to give up on pick up, finding wife/girlfriend, whatever etc, that's an individual choice each man has to make, however if you have tried your hardest, and still nothing, and there are many men in this predicament, then there is no shame in giving up, because how do you win a game, that is rigged against unattractive men?

And yes, men should know their limitations and not aim out of their league, for example if you are a 3 to 4/10 on the looks scale as a man, then you are wasting your time aiming for 9 to 10/10 looking women, this is common sense.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:40 pm 
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I know for a fact women despise Arab looking men.
HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

dude european women love arab cock. not to mention middle eastern bitches


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:52 pm 
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Hey Man I don't want to hate too much as you do seem like a nice guy who has a tough time. But seriously mate you need to get some confidence from anywhere, being bald is better than balding so if anyone says anything about it to you just reply 'Well I used to have hair hand down to my ass, but I didn't want it to cover up my best feature' - (The Game)
I honestly have the impression that you are content with your life with girls, as you don't seem like you want to change at all and you just want to blame your genetics, yes it is harder to pull if you are less attractive, but you can still do it if you put the work in. If I only had sex with hookers in my life, I would fork out anything to even just try and change that regarding going to a bootcamp. It's all about increasing percentages and making yourself a better person.

I wish you all the best and I hope that you wake up one day and decide that you really are going to try and change your life, just as I did.
Regards
-Wilso
P.s. Watch this video, this guy of Asian decent gets a number of a white girl who is taller than him so maybe use this as inspiration that physical appearance isn't the be all and end all. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU5oUYLkF7c

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:52 pm 
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I just think you're looking for excuses to blame anything on your failings but yourself, and you'll even blame your genetics to do so. So unless you do actually look like Yoda in being 3 ft tall, green and hairy, You should man up and approach more. 200 approaches in your entire life, when you're 40 isn't good enough at all. Maybe now because you're 40, club game isn't the best place anymore for you, but you should still go and try to just socialise as you obviously are socially inept which you need to get over. Why don't you join some local clubs where there will be women your age to improve your confidence and learn some new skills? Time is running out for all of us my friend, and unless you really do put yourself out there, you are going to die alone just like the rest of us would. That's a fact of life which has been the same since our species first began.
'You can't change the cards dealt, just the way you play the hand'
Regards
-Wilso
No, I am not looking for excuses, my looks and race are the reason why I have had no luck with women, because how do you explain the "instant fuck off" signals women give me, the dirty looks, and silent SPAM and I did nothing to provoke that kind of response.

I resent your assertion that I am socially inept, because I can talk the legs off a chair and have been told by many people that I have good social skills and can hold a decent conversation. However communication is a two way street, and what use are my social and communication skills if women refuse to engage with me, even before I open my mouth?. And to be honest with you, most of my rejections didn't even get to the stage where I asked the woman out for her to say no, I already knew she wasn't interested because of her negative body language, and female body language is not hard to read.

As for nightclubs, I hardly every went to them, I am more into live rock music, not dance stuff, but when I did go to them only the best looking men got the women. Sure there was the odd exception, but unless you are a very good looking guy, your chances of picking up a woman from a nightclub are very slim at best.

I admit that as I have got older I have withdrawn more into my shell, but that's because as a defence mechanism you tend to avoid the very activity that you identify as causing you the most pain ie. getting rejected by your opposite sex.

And no, I am not 3ft tall and hairy, I am 5'7, weigh 74kg, go to the gym 6 days week, and I play football (soccer) for a team, and I am in better shape than most men my age.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:55 pm 
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Quote:
I know for a fact women despise Arab looking men.
HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

dude european women love arab cock. not to mention middle eastern bitches
I am from Australia, not Europe, and maybe European women don't mind Arab looking men, but here in Australia, Arab men are hated by women, and I am not an Arab, I am Australian born and raised of Italian parents, but I look Middle Eastern.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 2:58 pm 
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I just think you're looking for excuses to blame anything on your failings but yourself, and you'll even blame your genetics to do so. So unless you do actually look like Yoda in being 3 ft tall, green and hairy, You should man up and approach more. 200 approaches in your entire life, when you're 40 isn't good enough at all. Maybe now because you're 40, club game isn't the best place anymore for you, but you should still go and try to just socialise as you obviously are socially inept which you need to get over. Why don't you join some local clubs where there will be women your age to improve your confidence and learn some new skills? Time is running out for all of us my friend, and unless you really do put yourself out there, you are going to die alone just like the rest of us would. That's a fact of life which has been the same since our species first began.
'You can't change the cards dealt, just the way you play the hand'
Regards
-Wilso
No, I am not looking for excuses, my looks and race are the reason why I have had no luck with women, because how do you explain the "instant fuck off" signals women give me, the dirty looks, and silent SPAM and I did nothing to provoke that kind of response.

I resent your assertion that I am socially inept, because I can talk the legs off a chair and have been told by many people that I have good social skills and can hold a decent conversation. However communication is a two way street, and what use are my social and communication skills if women refuse to engage with me, even before I open my mouth?. And to be honest with you, most of my rejections didn't even get to the stage where I asked the woman out for her to say no, I already knew she wasn't interested because of her negative body language, and female body language is not hard to read.

As for nightclubs, I hardly every went to them, I am more into live rock music, not dance stuff, but when I did go to them only the best looking men got the women. Sure there was the odd exception, but unless you are a very good looking guy, your chances of picking up a woman from a nightclub are very slim at best.

I admit that as I have got older I have withdrawn more into my shell, but that's because as a defence mechanism you tend to avoid the very activity that you identify as causing you the most pain ie. getting rejected by your opposite sex.

And no, I am not 3ft tall and hairy, I am 5'7, weigh 74kg, go to the gym 6 days week, and I play football (soccer) for a team, and I am in better shape than most men my age.
you just have to go through the pain period like everyone else and get through your shit until you can re-frame your limiting belief, you are good enough, you just have to enact the discipline it takes to get to your goal, once it has been reached you can form a new belief about what happened, start associating pleasure to the act of approaching, form a new habit, improve the routine

you can be all butthurt about how it is tough and how you got it bad, or you can just actually make use of the limited time you have on this earth and either get off your ass and put in more work meeting more women and finding the ones that actually do respond well, or if looks are such a huge issue to you, read up on some diet and nutrition, style, grooming, get a new look, dedicate yourself to the gym completely on the daily, and eat a clean diet, stay clean, and smell good

you only have one life and you are given what you have been given, you can either make the best of it, or you can make nothing of it, the choice is yours, not trying will get you the same results as trying and failing, not to mention it is not all about looks, confidence and non-neediness go along way, if you are in shape, projecting a sexy image and smelling good, then looks are not your problem, it's something else

GOOD LUCK


Last edited by pumpington on Wed Jun 13, 2012 3:04 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 3:02 pm 
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The industry claims looks dont matter for one most obvious reason.

If you are ugly, you probably dont get alot of girls just by being you, so you are the one most likely to buy a program on how to pick up girls.

Good looking guys usually cant understand why their uglier friends cant get women, they think it's easy. For them, it is.

Who is more likely to buy a weight loss program? A fat slob who is one cheeseburger away from a heart attack, or a naturally thin guy with a great metabolism?

That's exactly what an ugly guy wants to hear "looks dont matter" Not many would buy into it, if they said "if you are ugly, close this book right now"

It's hope in a bottle. And the people that market PUA programs know exactly who is buying it.


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