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36 Questions in 45 Minutes make ANY 2 people Fall in Love
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=120045
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Author:  Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:21 am ]
Post subject:  36 Questions in 45 Minutes make ANY 2 people Fall in Love

According to Dr Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships Lab at Stony Brook University, NY, as published in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (1997), there are 36 questions that almost always guarantee that 2 people, if they ask each other them over 45 minutes, will want to see each other again and have positive feelings towards one another. Here they are, in order:

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell you partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them: be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

Variations
37. If you could choose the sex and physical appearance of your soon-to-be-born child, would you do it?
38. Would you be willing to have horrible nightmares for a year if you would be rewarded with extraordinary wealth?
39. While on a trip to another city, your spouse/lover meets and spends a night with an exciting stranger. Given they will never meet again, and you will not otherwise learn of the incident, would you want your partner to tell you about it?

My thoughts
I think these are all great questions for getting to know someone in general. None of them can be used at the initial rapport-building part of a conversation, but if you're sitting down with someone and getting to know them properly, then they're all great.

In terms of women specifically, I would say pick your favourite 5-10 and incorporate them into the middle section of your first date. So, you'd start with a bit of banter, joking around, teasing and flirting, then get into your favourite questions (I would definitely avoid all the ones about death and anything negative!), and then end with someone along the lines of question 39, which would help you transition into some more SEXUAL conversation. The problem with these is if you did all the questions it's way too much comfort and not enough sexual. As long as you made things sexual afterwards and spent the last 25% of your date talking more along those lines, being sexual, touching more, etc. then you'd be fine!

Author:  NickStar [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:38 am ]
Post subject: 

Brilliant

Author:  lolaskate [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:42 am ]
Post subject: 

Does that mean, Love but no sexual attraction?

Author:  Cointoss [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 11:59 am ]
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I dunno, this stuff looks awefully mushy touchy feely on the emotional level.

Maybe the kind of topics you want to discuss after having dated for a few months (not all of them, but at least half or so).

Author:  Ezo [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 5:49 pm ]
Post subject: 

Awesome post Ryan!

The only reason I didnt quote you is that then technically we would have asked each other these questions and I dont want us to fall in love... ;)

Author:  Warped Mindless [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 6:35 pm ]
Post subject: 

Not hating on the questions or this post but I can totally see some guy reading this right now and going...

"Fuck yes!!! Finally, a magic pill!"

Then going out and getting into interview mode with women.

"Fuck you Ryan... she blew me off after the 5 question!!!"

Author:  P-Style [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 9:04 pm ]
Post subject: 

It's nice to see that there are starting to be topics about how to win a girl's heart after a gazillion posts about how picking a girl up for a one night's fuck.

Author:  Jav [ Tue Nov 08, 2011 10:00 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Not hating on the questions or this post but I can totally see some guy reading this right now and going...

"Fuck yes!!! Finally, a magic pill!"

Then going out and getting into interview mode with women.

"Fuck you Ryan... she blew me off after the 5 question!!!"
He could react like that on ALL forum posts.

What's your point?






OT:


yeah, good stuff. I'll give a few of em a go.

Author:  rsp [ Fri Nov 11, 2011 8:33 am ]
Post subject: 

nlp trick

you can do it by doing this structure :

1 - asking emotional question , going to unconscious mind then make them feel so good !

2 - echoing

3 - make them follow by your feeling

its more simple !

Author:  mesohorny [ Sat Nov 12, 2011 7:57 am ]
Post subject: 

dude , you really think questions can make people fall in love ?

Think about it , if were to read your questions , then fall in love with you , I would chase you down and ass gay rape you. I do not wish to be gay however.

Why would you post them in the first place ? If you want others to praise you for them , then you have low self esteem.

And why you insult us ? This is a pick up forum , we do not need this kind of advice.We all already know it. Really , you assumed there is somebody here that is unable to think those questions for himself. Shame on you !

Author:  $uave [ Sun Nov 13, 2011 4:09 am ]
Post subject: 

some good question there, can be easily incorporated in the "Question game" if you're on a date.

one thing is they're mostly building emotional connection, and comfort, which is great, just also there is good chance to end up in LJBF. you did mention going sexual. That's the key to have a meaningful converation without ending up in LJBF. You could progress question from more innocent ones to more sexual ones. The good one would be to have different emotional states in early ones with sexual ones in the last ones.

e.g. you can go 1-2 questions along lines of what was your the most embarassing thing you've done(hopefully its fun/positive if its not its still ok)
then 1-2 question on more deep/serious/a bit of a downer note
then 1-2 positive
and 1-2 sexual ones. Ususllay girls are the first ones to turn question sexual.

If they do-go with it, if they don't-you do it.

over all-good post-just don't end up being interviewer.

Author:  Au Naturel [ Sun Nov 13, 2011 4:22 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
dude , you really think questions can make people fall in love ?

Think about it , if were to read your questions , then fall in love with you , I would chase you down and ass gay rape you. I do not wish to be gay however.

Why would you post them in the first place ? If you want others to praise you for them , then you have low self esteem.

And why you insult us ? This is a pick up forum , we do not need this kind of advice.We all already know it. Really , you assumed there is somebody here that is unable to think those questions for himself. Shame on you !
You are without doubt the most uninformed poster on this forum. It's a great list of suggested questions to ask a girl once you are in rapport if you like her. What's wrong with that?

He hasn't posted it for an ego boost any more than anyone who posts a suggestion, he's posting it because these are things he thinks are useful that people could use.

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