day 1:
After alot of reading online of other pua's, (theres literally 10,000's, theyre scattered all over the internet sharing their products or for sale all bootcamps are like $5k each really....), i have settled on following johnny berba for his pua knowledge. He has an individual social anxiety program that is well priced and set apart from pua stuff but also if you watch his "about me" videos on youtube, even though they are long, right from 20 seconds in I just thought: "this guy gets it, he truly understands what absolute rock bottom is when you cant even look someone in the eyes or talk to someone if you truly need to, even if its just a shop clerk when you need to buy something like cigarettes or gum- and you feel like even that is hard". I have started his social anxiety program which is a 30 day program. His actual course is a 6 week program, it includes multiple SPAM calls with berba himself, plus even though he works by himself, he has 1000's of infield daygame pickups (no nightclub sets with blasting music, dark SPAM and filled with drunk meatheads for me). However, if anyone thinks i am promoting his product, please note, I have made the decision to follow a pua that has the same history as me and makes videos that I relate best with. Im sure anyone else here is following particular pua's on youtube.
I have also started meditating to relieve the anxiety as well as excercise and eating right (since january this year; weight loss has been 18kg since that time). I have also made an important call to mensline here in Australia. They have told me to make an appoitment to my general practitioner for the anxiety help and a visit at 11am resulted in a prescription for medication (i call them chill out pills) and referral to a counsellor. I have specifically asked for a mentor and they understand that they have people who can help. I was referred to the mental health plan which is a national government plan which subsidises mental health costs- so I feel more positive.
Other people have asked me to make a goal for myself. I can safely say my choice of woman to be with is a nice asian woman (i like the way they look, plus I never look short in comparison to any of them) with some brains as well. I spotted a couple in my local aldi by themselves, perfect opportunity to do something, but its still early days.
set 1:
noticed a thin asian woman trying to buy drawer locks for a draw she wanted to keep private from others. I asked if I could help her and told her I fix alot in my home and recommended a small hinge latch that she could screw in by herself and use a tiny padlock, both are very cheap but she could install it by herself. If i extended the conversation, I could of offered to help install it for her and that way I would of invited myself to her home or office- but really, we had only just met, thats some true advance pua stuff and im only on my first set. My question is though: if I did go and do housework for her, does that make me a chump? Is that doing work for no guarantee of intimacy? Or, If I did install the hinge, would this have been a good idea to buy me some time?
She was short and thin, she was dressed in all black and I thought it was pretty sexy, kind of weird because it was a black top, black skirt and black leggings and also black shoes, but I was like, whatever, Id rather try then nothing. She also had a pretty strong chinese accent but she spoke really good english.
This set was purely to stop the anxiety and start this work of finding a partner. I knew I had to start somewhere. The conversation was purely just listening to what she needed and trying to talk to a stranger so I wont bore you all with the details. 2/10 just for the effort.
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