We are in the same in the regard that what tends to motivate me, is the thrill and adrenaline rush that I get from doing an approach. I get a certain JOLT of excitement about life - that's hard for me to comeby. I start to feel ALIVE - instead of going through my day like a half-awake zombie.

Mmm, I'm not really quite sure how to answer that. I've got a lot more discipline over my sexual urges than I did in the past. Well, not really discipline. More of a disconnection to sex.

In my teenage years I would find myself addicted to masturbation even though I really desperately wanted to stop it. These days I have managed to stop it.

When I see a prostitute I kind of get the same feeling as I do with masturbation. As in it feels a bit pointless. But I do it anyway and it's not really satisfying.

I want to be talking to regular women, not prostitutes. I want to have sex with regular women. Is that so much to ask? It seems it is a lot to ask as it's never occurred yet.

The prostitutes just cement the hole that I am in so to speak. Maybe I have a good night and then suddenly hey bro, back here again paying for it eh?

I feel a bit like a half-awake zombie sometimes. Most of my time is spent working in an office job. When I go out on my lunch break I sometimes see some hot chicks around and it frustrates me to no end that I have to go back in the office like it's a prison when I could potentially be out doing day game (especially when the weather is nice).

What I need to do is go into Hulk Mode. There's no greater feeling. I've unleashed it in daygame and nightgame in the past. The nightgame one was the most exhilarating. I hadn't drunk anything that night but I pretended I was drunk and/or high on something. I went on the dancefloor and just went crazy not caring what anyone thought! And when I got sick of dancing I approached targets left, right and center!

This was back in 2013 and I haven't managed to replicate it fully since.

There's something satisfying about going out for the day trying to talk to women. Even if I spend a whole day walking around wanting to approach but not approaching (which is inherently frustrating) it still feels good to be out doing something. The previous Saturday before last I spent a few hours walking around town. I only did one quick approach (which I recorded: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6cDuefpVAk - I ejected as soon as her baby starting crying ) but at least I was out being proactive rather than just sitting at home.

Heh, I have sort of gone backwards since starting this journal. Last night out at the club I did nothing at all - not one approach.

I've got some pointers now though:

- Just relax. Don't worry about getting into state or going into Hulk mode or what-have-you. I'm more of a quiet achiever.
- Don't think about it too much. Just try to have fun.
- Getting laid is actually very easy. All I need to do is approach, have a bit of a conversation, be mindful of shit tests, re-approach if necessary, push for f-close and it's done. Simple.

My main sticking points are being shy and having approach anxiety. Way to get around that is simple:

- First off, be positive. You have to somehow convince yourself that chances are high that you will achieve success with the target. You can't go in expecting failure as it reduces your motivation.

And here's the real key:

- Go in like you have a purpose! You don't walk into a store with an initial intention of buying something and then stand around, get shy, and leave. No, you go in, pick up the item you want, pay for it and leave! Same thing with women. You need to go in and get what you want as you would in a store. You don't feel shame going into a store so why should you feel shame going up to a woman?

It's just about wanting to get pussy, that's all it is. Sure, I can just go to a brothel and pay for it but it's expensive, there's not much choice, and it's not really satisfying. I don't get shy walking into a brothel so I shouldn't be shy walking up to a woman.

That's all there is to it pretty much. I've got nothing else to say.

One more thing, don't worry about it too much and try to enjoy life.

I don't think there's any additional advice or teachings that anyone can provide that will improve my interactions with women. It's not rocket science after all.

THE GOLDEN RULE:

"Don't care what they think."

Have you looked for a wing in your area? Are you willing to visit other cities to find wings? Working with other people who are better than you with pickup will be sure to improve your game MASSIVELY and pick out sticking points that you otherwise wouldn't notice. I strongly advise you to find some wings OR go on a recommended course from the forum where an instructor can give you in person advice about your mindset and game.

These aren't necessary. The only issues I have are inner game issues. The system I follow places little emphasis on outer game as the outer game process is remarkably simple:

All I need to do is approach, have a bit of a conversation, be mindful of shit tests, re-approach if necessary, push for f-close and it's done. Simple.

It's my inner game issues that cause me to not follow correct outer game procedure.

New hard and fast rule I'm implementing as of today is the following:

No more consumption of alcohol.

Last night I consumed more alcohol than I have in the past and it didn't help me get into the zone at all. I DON'T NEED ALCOHOL. No more. It also lessens my discipline in regards to abstaining from prostitutes.

Last night I managed to do only one approach:

Me: Would you like to have sex?
Her: You're very direct.
Me: Yeah, I've learnt from very direct pickup artists. That's my style.
Her: Well, I'm right.
Me: Oh okay. So you're not horny?
Her: No.
Me: Oh, so you had a good night?
Her: Yeah, I had fun. You?
Me: Yeah alright. I just come here to look for pussy basically. I usually don't get anywhere though. I've drunken more than I usually do which is why I just asked you straight up if you wanted to have sex.
Her: Oh okay, well sorry, I'm right.
Me: That's okay.

I went to a brothel later in the night and just as the prostitute I booked was about to give me a blowjob I for some reason said "I understand everyone needs to make a living and I respect what you do". To this she said something along the lines that no one has said anything like this to her and that I made her feel comfortable. Rather than giving me a blowjob she started talking a lot and I asked her questions like I do when trying to pick up (i.e. what's your favorite color, favorite fruit, do you have any brothers and sisters etc.). We also talked about what we value in relationships. She told me she just got divorced from a guy who didn't give her enough of his time to spend with her. She also told me that she recently went to a bar alone and wanted guys to come up and talk to her but no one did!

Anyway, we eventually got to having sex which I kind of regretted as I was having more fun with the conversing and the thought that I should ask this beautiful lady out on a date. It kind of felt like I met someone who I had been looking for to finally have a relationship with. She gave me compliments but I know this could have just been the money talking so to speak.

The sex was boring. I think I'm over sex, especially at 4:00 AM on a Sunday morning. She seemed to get off though and I asked her what she liked and we did what she wanted - which is how I want to approach sex. But still it was boring.

When it was over the feeling of asking her out on a date had gone (it went away as soon as we started having sex) but I did it anyway and she said to come back to the brothel in a month's time and ask her then as she was too busy now. I said I was disappointed and only gave a 'maybe' as reassurance that I would come back in a month.

-------

I think this low libido is an issue. My sex drive isn't motivating me enough to do pick up. At the club I just stood there feeling like I was above everyone else as I have conquered my sexual addictions. I don't masturbate. Porn isn't entertaining anymore and I don't like to watch it as I prefer to just wait to get the real thing.

When I'm work I often realize that I am happy and normal being single. But I know I can be a great partner to someone I may eventually hook up with as I like to live by honesty, trust and respect.

1. How do YOU know you only have inner game issues? You will never be able to have a full unbiased view of your clothing, your style, your mannerisms, from yourself. How the heck can you KNOW that these aren't impacting you in any way?
2. Even if you ONLY had inner game issues, a good wing would help you because they will be able to show you the frame necessary for good pickup and you'll be able to channel that frame more effectively around him.

No offense buddy but I think that you really need to take a good look in the mirror and think carefully about who you are, what you want and what you've been doing. Someone who regularly pays for prostitutes saying that they've conquered their sexual addictions? Doesn't add up. And while I don't think you're necessarily addicted to sex, you certainly crave the feeling of a loving partner.

Because I know what's impacting me - me. How can I blame my clothing, my style and/or mannerisms when I'm not even approaching? That's the key issue. Lately I've gone backwards and have hardly done any approaches at all.

Last night out I felt like I was in the mood when I got to the club but about 10 minutes in the energy just left me and I didn't feel like doing anything again. This issue seems more prominent in the Winter. Maybe I should go to a venue that's warmer. Also maybe the club I go to doesn't play the right kind of music to get me in the mood. I'm a R&B and hip hop kind of guy - the high energy dance/rave/trance kind of stuff doesn't really do it for me.
Again, having the correct frame is useless if I'm not approaching in the first place. I don't believe I need to have a right "frame" either. I just need to approach and get talking and not eject prematurely. Having wings might help get past the approach anxiety though but I don't want to compete with them, because if they pick up and I don't I would probably get all pissed off. Going out lone wolf is probably best as I relax and concentrate.


I have conquered my sexual addictions. The prostitute thing is an annoyance but it's not indicative of uncontrollable sexual urges. It's just a stupid thing I like to do after clubbing for some reason (only if I'm on holidays or something do I go in the daytime). Sometimes I'm able to abstain but lately it's been in full swing which isn't too surprising as my game has been shit lately (as it usually is this time of year).

I'm not sure if I crave the feeling of a loving partner. Last year I met a girl who I went out with once. I believe she was falling in love with me at the time as that's what she wrote on her Facebook. I developed feelings for her too as I felt different during that time. I thought 'how on Earth did I go on for so long without being in love?'. But despite this, due to an inner struggle, instead of trying to progress the relationship forward (even though I half wanted to) I decided in the heat of the moment to sabotage it. I felt really shit doing that but I was also really happy as I was free again to try and get good at pick up.

So now I'm back in that normal loveless state with a desire to approach women as I always do but not really doing much at the moment, which could be due to having a low libido, which the cold weather doesn't really help with. I can imagine myself having sex with a hot chick right now but nothing really feels special about it - just a robotic boring emotionless type thing.

A couple of years ago when I approached a lady and she told me her address and to 'come round anytime I'm bored' I suddenly went into a different emotional state where I felt like the sex was going to be very exciting. But unfortunately it didn't happen. I went round to her place once and she had a guy there at the time so I said I would come back another time but I never did.

This is all getting to be frustrating bullshit. I pretty much basically have no idea what to do at the moment apart from hope that I do some approaches in the near future that will get me feeling like I'm on the path again. I love looking at women and doing approaches (when I do them). I want to be getting one night stands and easy lays and things. I probably don't want to settle down yet as kind of determined with the girl last year.

I've invested so much time and energy into this stuff that to just slide into a loving relationship would be the biggest anti climax ever - although I'm not adverse to the idea of developing a relationship with someone in a "yay I can get a girlfriend" kind of way.

Listen to my advice that I gave you earlier. Get a wing, or even better a good set of wings. You will push each other to approach.
There's a saying "doing the same thing and expecting a different result is madness". You're putting the cart before the horse - I've gone out with wings, we establish communication, let each other know if it's ok or NOT to approach a set, and everything is cool. Work things out man, stop looking for excuses to stay where you are and NOT improve.
Going lone wolf has NOT worked for you. You do NOT need to be any more relaxed. You NEED to be pushed, if you want to get better at this. If you can't do it yourself (which seems quite obvious) then get someone to do it for you. Stop intentionally retarding your own progress. You need a bit of assistance with approaching - that's cool, nothing is wrong with that. Get a wing.

I am getting back on the path now. I want to make a formal declaration that I will not engage the services of prostitutes any longer. My use of prostitutes is the thing that keeps knocking me back into the past. Part of my evolution process is to leave them behind so I will now.

The second thing I want to mention is that I now want to use women to get out of my head. Part of the reason for my limited success rate thus far is that I get stuck in my head ruminating about my lack of progress and how shitty that is. If I can instead approach women to stop that thinking for a while it will be worthwhile.

To give an example, here I am on this forum typing a post and so thinking about my development. It would be better if I was talking to a hot girl right now. It would force my mind to shut up and concentrate. The more I can stop ruminating the better I will feel.

Of course the ultimate relaxation would be to actually be having sex. I think that's why I still go to prostitutes as it's a form of relaxation. I get to have pussy in front of me which is basically what I have been chasing so hard for. So having sex with a non-prostitute will quieten down a circuit in my brain. I have no idea how I would feel afterwards. Will I be dancing around for joy that I've finally accomplished something that I wanted to achieve for so long? Or would I just feel the same?

Anyway, that's all irrelevant. I think it's inevitable now that I will get an unpaid for root as long as I abstain from prostitutes. I just need to stop thinking and start approaching and enjoy it.

Women only lie. I approached a chick last Saturday and she told me straight away that she had a boyfriend. Just found her on Facebook by looking at the club photos and her status is single. She also gave me a fake name. I found it odd that she gave me a full name and said to add her to Facebook. I hardly talked to her.

Women must take delight in lying but they secretly also want to be picked up. Before she left after out short conversation she said "Is it okay if I go back inside now?". I responded with "Sure, have a good night". What I should of said is "No, I want to talk to you more" or something like that. I knew I let a potential opportunity go there.

It's funny, she wasn't even very good looking. They all like to play these games it seems.

I've now made a commitment to abstain from prostitutes for ten weeks. I'm not committing to abstain forever as I think that's too hard. I've made that commitment so many times in the past and have always broken it. So, for just 10 weeks out of my normal routine, I want to be ho-free.

I think this goal is actually possible. Ten weeks isn't a long time. It can feel like it but it's not a long time considering how long I have been indulging in the habit. The longest I've abstained since starting the habit is about nine weeks, and that was back in 2008.

Once the ten weeks is up I can relax again and decide what to do.

Equal priority to this abstinence is pick up. Since I can't pay for it for a couple of months I am now forced to do pick up in order to get sex. I think I'm more motivated now. Hopefully some decent field reports will be incoming. I just need to stop dicking around to be successful.

I just looked at club photos on Facebook and saw a pic of three girls standing next to each other (supposedly friends), all of which have grinded me on the dancefloor in the past. All three were opportunities. I've got memories of myself approaching women and doing stuff. Hopefully I will be doing some more stuff soon.

It's time to get serious. Just ten weeks. So far I've got about two. I didn't go out to the club last Saturday as the weather was a bit too cold, but I plan to go out to the club this coming weekend. Despite previous sentiments on wanting to remain sober I think I am going to consume some alcohol. I'm going to have fun and I'm going to end up licking some box hopefully. Mmm...yum.

Simply abstaining from prostitutes may help a bit, but I have a feeling that your approach unwillingness is due to far more than visiting prostitutes. It's a learned habit - you've become used to NOT approaching, it's ingrained now.

You need to be taking concrete steps, besides not visiting prostitutes, to change your behaviour.

In addition you need to establish some sort of specific goals and behaviours that you want to achieve.

Just my suggestions.

I don't know if abstaining from prostitutes will really help at all in terms of pick up. I just want to achieve ten clean weeks for the sense of accomplishment I may feel. I've been regularly paying for it for years so to have a break from it sounds reasonable. Ten weeks is a long time though. It's not in the overall scheme of things but with me sitting here with only about two weeks under my belt so far it seems a fair way off.

I really just want to hurry up and get it done because it requires a lot of mental energy. The fact that I may just go out tonight and do what I usually do is worrying. I freaking hope that won't be the case though. If I had already achieved my ten clean weeks now I could go out tonight and relax and do whatever I feel like in the moment. But no, that's not yet.

If I can somehow pick up a chick tonight and have sex with her that would be awesome. The problem is that I don't really know how possible or easy that is though. Sure, I could watch other guys do it and stuff, but it only becomes real through personal experience. And so far I haven't picked up through personal experience. I've felt close at times. I think in a couple of instances all I needed to do was to re-approach and I would have been successful.

I do believe it is easy though. That's what motivates me to go out in the first place. But the easiness is masked. Masked by chicks going out with their boyfriends and so provoking a sense of scarcity (everyone is in a relationship besides me), masked by chicks saying they have boyfriends when they really don't, masked by a lot of little things that just makes me think 'what am I doing here?' and so not do anything as a result.

It's all too easy just to go to the brothel and spend the money, which isn't cheap. I could go to the city and pick up street walkers which are apparently a lot cheaper but it's not really about the money. I would really like a genuine experience for a change and not be just a customer fueling an industry.

Part of the reason we are put on this planet is to have sex. To have one gender charge the other gender for it seems ludicrous.

Heh, but that's the way things are. Anyway, my first priority at the moment is the abstinence. It would be nice to have some progress with the ladies though. Ah shit, I'm having doubts now...

The abstinence is easy. I don't want to get ten clean weeks and then just break the abstinence. I want to abstain from prostitutes indefinitely. I don't like using prostitutes.

What I'm focused on now is just charging my sexual energy. I don't want to discharge the energy on prostitutes - I want to keep it. And if I ever do need to discharge it I will masturbate.

This notion of not wanting to discharge sexual energy is how I quit masturbation. I wanted to watch porn and have my energy increased but not release it by masturbating. I wanted to keep it as it would make me feel good and that's what gave me the incentive to not masturbate.

Now I'm applying the same sort of strategy to abstaining from prostitutes. Rather than going out to a club to specifically pick up, I now go out to get my energy charged - to enjoy looking at sexy women and interacting with them. I don't want to ruin the experiences by visiting a prostitute.

Pick-up has to be enjoyable to me. It can't just be a hard slog to try to get sex. It can be about getting sex but the 'trying' has to be removed from the equation. It has to be about 'getting' and enjoying the interactions regardless of the outcome.

If you know for a fact that you're going to have sex with a particular woman you don't want to have a hard time with her before you have sex with her. You want to enjoy the foreplay. You want to get yourself ready and enjoy the time with her beforehand so that when it finally does come time to have sex the sex is more enjoyable.

There's no point in pick being a hard slog if prostitutes are available. What would be the difference between me going up a chick, performing the necessary steps but finding it a struggle, and then finally having sex with her and then finally relaxing and enjoying the sex; as opposed to going to a brothel, spending money that I've worked to get, and then relax and enjoy sex with the prostitute? Both of those scenarios sound pretty similar to me.

So, I just want to enjoy myself when I go out. Charge up my sexual energy but not release it. It's when I get desperate for sex that I get frustrated and end up going to a brothel. Well, no more of that.