My Pickup Journal- by Unfazed



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PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 9:53 pm 
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Here's the bullet points of the whole AE girl story:

A long time ago (6 months?): Unfazed goes to Spanish Club. AE girl comes to Spanish Club. Unfazed be like oooooo, what's this? She's cute, I wonder if she's cool... Unfazed does nothing but self amuse, making the entire club roar with laughter, and nothing else happens.

Some time later: Unfazed runs into AE girl at library. Goes up and fluffs for a minute. Exchanges names with AE girl.

Some more time later: Unfazed runs into AE girl on campus. Fluffs for a minute. AE girl tells Unfazed he should come back to Spanish Club. Unfazed thinks that she's on the hook.

Summer arrives, Unfazed's cloud of cute college girls fly away with the summer breeze, Unfazed says, "Finally! I can get some work done..."

Not long after... Unfazed runs into AE girl again at Spanish Club. AE girl laughs at absolutely everything Unfazed says. Unfazed suggests food after the club to entire club. Walking out, he asks AE girl specifically. She says she has plans, but asks Unfazed if he's coming next week. He takes this as a signal of interest.

The next week at Spanish club, AE girl again laughs at everything Unfazed says. Everyone goes to the Rio after. Unfazed makes entire group laugh themselves to tears. Unfazed posts a picture of the group on Facebook. AE girl likes it, they become Facebook friends.

Unfazed invites AE girl to a group hangout through Facebook, she has plans, but it's a warm no. She mentions a bunch about how next time she would love to.

Unfazed organizes a S'mores potluck. AE girl responds on Facebook that she is coming. She's the first to arrive at the party. They talk and flirt, although in a big group, the entire party. She's the last to leave, after staying to help clean. Unfazed is now reasonably sure she is on the hook and isn't letting go any time soon. They make plans to go hiking in a group, and exchange numbers.

Unfazed randomly texts her during the day (she works in the next building over), telling her about free food. She meets him there, they flirt a bit. She starts initiating touch.

The next Spanish Club, everyone goes to the Rio again. AE girl initiates more flirting. They get ice cream with two more people after. Unfazed goes to the bathroom. When he gets back, the two other people start asking him random questions, like, "How old are you?" and "Are you active in the Fort Collins dating scene?" Unfazed finds this very random until he realizes... these two people (close with AE girl) know that AE girl likes Unfazed, and is running recon for her. Unfazed's inner badass smiles mischievously as he realizes that AE girl has taken it hook, line, and sinker.

The aforementioned sunset hike happens in a big group. More flirtation happens. AE girl suggests a movie after. All but Unfazed, AE girl, and a RANDOM SHITHEAD COCKBLOCKER stay at Unfazeds' place for the movie. It's Unfazed and AE girl on a couch, sitting close with arms / legs touching, and douchebag clockblock central on other couch, making dumbass shithead ass clown comments about the movie. This goes on for literally an hour. Unfazed runs game as normal, looking through AE girl's tablet and asking questions about photos, completely ignoring said shithead. Shithead eventually leaves, thank the good lord. Unfazed asks more questions about the photos, this goes on for another 20-30 minutes. Unfazed looks her dead in the eye and asks her if she wants to kiss him. She smiles, says maybe, and leans in eagerly, like a newborn bird asking for food from it's mommy. That was a weird analogy.

Commence making out and cuddling for an hour. Unfazed drives AE girl back home. They tell each other they like each other AWWWWWWWWWWWW. She tells him about her one previous bf, that she didn't like, that she dated for 6 months and didn't kiss until month 3, that she broke up with. Unfazed begins to suspect that she's a virgin.

The next night they go to the drive-in theater. They watch Inside Out, and cuddle in the minivan on a hodge podge of blankets. They start making out. Then they just cuddle for awhile. Unfazed starts sucking slowly on her fingers and gently biting them. AE girl gets turned on and aggressively makes out with Unfazed. Unfazed starts running his hands over the legs and butt. Slides his hands under the shirt. Goes for the bra, but like a fucking amateur struggles with it. The moment is lost, and AE girl says, "maybe we should take it slower". Unfazed agrees, and can sense that she's more awkward. He asks if everything's alright, she says yeah, but her body language says no. Unfazed lets her know they don't have to do anything, he'll still like her if they don't fool around. She tells him thanks, that definitely helps. They cuddle the rest of the second movie, she falls asleep on him, and on the car ride back she apologizes for getting awkward back there. He says it's fine, no biggie, completely understandable.

The next Spanish Club, she has to study for a test after. Unfazed surprises her at Alley Cat, they have a study party, she is eternally grateful, and takes the gesture very well. Goes to kiss him after. They do lunch the next day. She leaves for 2 weeks for a family vacation.

She gets back, and the 2nd smores party happens (outlines in previous posts, as is the rest of the story). BOOM Stuff of legends...

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 10:48 pm 
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Oh yeah... AE girl still lives with her parents. Crazy. She's 20, and is doing college from home to save money. So innocent. So naive. So corruptible.

It's been a long journey, guys. I love writing. I love journaling. I'll just keep delivering value like I always do...

It always starts with a girl. In fact, this is dumb that I keep calling myself Unfazed. I feel like that was my pick up name. I'm just going to go ahead and retire that shit and call myself by my real name from now on. Everyone calls me Ning, nice to meet you, you perverts.

Ning was sort of a halfway natural in that he somehow figured out (subconsciously), that all you had to do was have a really fun time and be really happy, and girls would like you. After stumbling across this fact, he uses this to be in two relationships, adding up to 9 FUCKING YEARS OF HIS LIFE. If you didn't know, that's a freaking lot, especially in the prime ages of 18-27. He doesn't regret it though, learning how to relationship is just as important as learning how to man-whore. Girl 1, LJ girl, was for 4 years, and HLS girl was for 5 years.

You all can guess what happens next. HLS girl SHITS on Ning's heart, slashes it into a million pieces with a katana, and takes another wet shit on the pieces for good measure by cheating on him with some random douche bag from medical school. Ning falls into a deep depression for a month, reads Neil Strauss' legendary book, takes the red pill (or is it blue pill?) and falls down the rabbit hole. It's January.

He becomes obsessed with it, and like anything he does that he's become obsessed with in the past (basketball, running, jiu jitsu, music, etc.) he constructs a HUGE vision of himself and where he wants to go, and takes MASSIVE FUCKING ACTION.

After a bit of research, reading, and video watching, he proceeds to go start going out. At first the hideous monster known as approach anxiety slaps Ning around a bit, but gradually, slowly, he starts doing a couple approaches here, a couple approaches there. He meets a random dude who had steel balls, who takes Ning around for his first day game run. They approach 15-20 sets each, and Ning gets his first taste of "God Mode", where all the fear melts away and gets replaced by the high of doing something scary and surviving it unscathed.

Sometime early spring, Ning turns into a FUCKING APPROACH MACHINE ROBOT. He finds a couple other newbies to go out with, and proceeds to approach upwards of 20 sets a night. He goes out 5-7 nights a week, approaching as many sets as he can each night, pushing his boundaries and figuring out what works and what doesn't work. He becomes an expert at managing his state, being nonreactive to rejection, not hesitating on the approach, and high energy game.

It's been mostly in bars up to this point, and Ning's first night club experience is a sobering one. He realizes that his dance floor game is straight up donkey shit, and decides to get to work improving that.

Ning starts getting numbers and dates more easily, and eventually realizes that they don't mean shit.

Ning progresses the fastest out of the group of three newbies, mainly because of his animalistic approach numbers and his increasing level of social calibration. Up until now, most of the material he studies has been from RSD, Simple Pickup, and Neil Strauss.

Ning eventually leaves his beloved college home of Ithaca, NY, where he'd been for 7.5 years, and drives halfway across the country to forget that one girl that obliterated his heart. He arrives in Fort Collins, CO, ready to start a PhD program in a town where he knew EXACTLY 3 people that he had talked to before. It's June.

Ning uses Meetup.com to find TM bro (T-bone), who's also into cold-approaching, and they start going out together. Ning also starts attending running club and other meetup events to build connections. He also doesn't take his foot off the pedal, still going out 7 nights a week, either alone or with TM bro. He hits a plateau where attraction comes easily, numbers and dates come easily, occasional instant make-outs and such happen, but anything beyond that is touch and go.

Frustrated and burnt out, Ning searches for more answers. Lo and behold, his savior arrives in the form of Jason Capital. Ning finds the NUMBER 1 DATING COACH ON THE PLANET for men, and swallows all his material, and suddenly everything changes. Ning starts implementing social circle game, and starts organizing social events. He starts building up a harem of girls that act as preselection wherever he goes. He starts working on himself, working on his health, his career, his goals, in addition to game. He starts making meaningful friendships. He also starts developing a completely delusional GIGANTIC ego and starts considering himself higher value than every girl he sees, no matter how hot. Jason Capital calls it the Power Switch, and approves mightily. It's August.

Ning starts dating a girl through the use of social circle game, BI girl. This goes on for a couple months before Ning gets tired of her and dumps her. Starts dating HR girl, his first physical specimen of a catch (not too much going on upstairs tho...). Gets tired of her and dumps her. All the while, he's increasing his social circle, his reach of influence, and his ability to manage his state and his emotions. He gets GANGSTA AS FUCK at this, and starts walking around happy about life all day every day. He's also swallowing up all the Jason Capital material he can get his hands on.

Pretty soon, he's gone through almost every program Jason Capital has to offer. He's read Make Women Want You, he's read 77 ways to make her want to fuck you, he's gone through Social God (SO FUCKING GOOD), he's done Attraction God, he's even gone through the entire STATUS program (INSANE, INSANE, INSANE program). He overhauls his wardrobe, completely changes his look. He's loud as FUCK now and his head might explode with ego. His lay count goes from 2 to 15 within half a year. He's starting to attract more girls than he knows what to do with. He almost can't believe he's attracting all these 19, 20 year old girls in college while he's 28 and Asian in a completely white town. Then he remembers, oh yeah, I'm a badass, and then he CAN believe it.

He hits another plateau, where he can attract and connect with girls, get girls chasing him, but then stumbles in the escalation phase. He starts making this his main focus. He no longer cold approaches, as social circle game gives him plenty of options and plenty of practice, and he basically charms everyone he comes into contact with without even trying to game. He starts seeing interest from waitresses, cashier girls, students, pretty much everywhere he goes. It's the next January.

He starts coaching JK bro, and learning what works and what doesn't when it comes to helping others.

He starts focusing on what to do with his career and with his money choices. He starts doubling, tripling his productivity by being a gangsta in every facet of his life: health, people skills, and career. He believes anything is possible. It's June again.

He organizes an event and 70 people get invited. An upgrade from the 3 that he knew when he arrived in Colorado.

The cherry on top: HLS girl, the one that stomped on his heart, is now back in love with him from across the country away, and wants to rebuild what they have, and is flying to visit him every few months for raunchy sex in addition to other things.

The moral of the story:

It IS entirely possible to get better with women, I'm living proof. This is what it takes:

1. TAKE MASSIVE FUCKING ACTION.
2. When you fail, which you will, INTERPRET IT POSITIVELY. SELF-ANALYZE CONSTANTLY. Keep a fucking journal.
3. When you succeed (even the smallest bit), REWARD YOURSELF AND TELL YOURSELF YOU'RE AWESOME.
4. ^^These two points will keep you happy and motivated. If you don't do #2 and #2, you WILL burn out and quit like 99% of the fucking masses.
5. Become OBSESSED with the idea of improvement, and not with the results. Never ever stop improving, because as soon as you stand still, you start slipping backwards.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2015 4:07 pm 
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Girls come secondary to my goals. I somehow forget this the more deeply I'm connected with a girl, and it always results in the same consequence: the girl gets pushed away.

I'm not saying AE girl is running for the hills, but I need to take a breath and get my shit together. I'm spending all my free time with her. I haven't gone to the gym or run in awhile. I use the excuse that my leg is still recovering from a nasty infection (it is) but I could at least go to the gym. This is bullshit behavior and unacceptable.

I need to refocus my shit.

That being said, I am going swimming with AE girl and some mutual friends at noon today. That's okay, but afterwards, no more thinking about her, back to figuring out web development, YouTube lead generation, and finishing that shit pile of a book known as the Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks.

I chatted with CH bro (sonymenu on this forum) on Facebook yesterday, it was great to catch up. This was a guy that I was hitting the bars with in the very beginning back in New York, in my mass approach phase. He's now in Berkeley, and he told me about his little latino of 6 weeks that he's dating, and I gave him the whole cute little blondie AE girl story. Hats off to the bro, I can tell he's gone far as well.

I can tell that my state has been lower the past week or so, and I know EXACTLY why: AE girl. I think about her too much. I'm becoming results-oriented with her. I just want to grab her and do terrible, terrible things to her. It's making me analyze all her moves. It's making me try to game her, instead of the way it should be: her gaming me.

Instead, I should be focusing on ME. My vision. Working on my lab shit and business shit (all but fallen by the wayside). That stuff makes me feel AMAZING. It fills me with masculine energy all day and pumps me the FUCK up. This is a pledge. I WILL change this around.

Here's the hilarious thing about girls:

When I post a million pictures of me and some girl up on Facebook, all the other girls get jealous and start pursuing me even more. For example, I put up 50 million pictures of me and AE girl up yesterday, and suddenly HLS girl is calling me, leaving voicemails, and texting the shit out of my phone. MB girl all the way from Boston texts me with a random cat question as an excuse to talk to me then transitions into asking about my summer.

The key to posting pictures with girls on Facebook is to make it ambiguous what the status with the girl is. With AE girl, the pics do insinuate there's something romantic going on, but all the rest of my photos, it's very ambiguous whether I'm dating the girl, we're just flirting, or if I'm just friends with 5 million girls. This makes all the other girls wonder, and if they wonder, they're spending brain space on you, and the more brain time and space they spend on you, the more invested in you they become, the more invested in you they become, the more badly they want your D.

I think of journaling as similar to opening my mouth and speaking. The more I talk, the more in state I get, the happier I become. The more I journal, the more I get absorbed into the writing process, and again, the more in state I get. The more I write, the happier and more goofy the writing gets.

Jason Capital always does physical state anchors before his videos and before he writes, and his pumped up state can be FELT through the writing. I should make this a habit of mine as well.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2015 2:33 pm 
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Last night I had coaching session with JK bro.

We worked mainly on vocal tonality and presentation, and not sounding like a sad robot when he speaks. He practiced his ability to change his facial expressions, his eye contact, and even practiced delivery of a couple hilarious lines. All in all, some good shit.

Then we talked about last weekend, where he sent my roommate MS girl a drunk text telling her he liked her. We share a jolly good chortle about it, and I inform him that that literally works like 5% of the time.

It's okay, though, everyone has to learn this for themselves the hard way.

I learned that with LM girl last summer, who was chasing me hard so I thought it would be okay to just tell her we should date. NOPE

I also learned that summer that even if a girl really likes you, you can't just lunge mouth rape make out with her in public. Who knew? MP girl, a gorgeous Asian girl, taught me that lesson.

AE girl texted me to go tango-ing with her on Friday night, here's the exchange:

Her:
Yeah they do. Usually this hip thing improves by the next day. Hey on a completely different note, wanna go tango-ing on Friday? It might be fun

Me:
Where / what time is the tango thing

Her:
Club Tico 7-9

Me:
That sounds fun! Prepare to get outdanced :)

Her:
Oh, I'm prepared..... to kick your booty! haha, just kidding, I have never done tango before.

Me:
Me neither... Let's just try and not be the laughingstock of the whole place

Her:
Good plan. I'll probably watch some youtube lessons. haha

*no response from me, end of interaction*

She's still into me, it's just cooled down a bit from last weekend, which is fine, it's given me time to get my shit together and forget about her a bit. A grand total of 3 other girls texted me post Facebook- posting. Hilarious. MB girl, HLS girl, and JS girl (used to be FWB's with). Hadn't talked to JS girl in like 3 months. Hilariously predictable.

Thassit for today, keep it gangsta

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 25, 2015 4:38 am 
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AE girl, AZ girl, and MS girl and I bond and tell ghost stories over a bonfire Wednesday night.

AE girl brings me tango dancing Friday night (just got back from that). It went well, she introduced me to her dad, who she chatted with, and told him that I was a "romantic interest".

Her dress looked amazing, absolutely stunning tonight, it's kind of unfair how distracting it was.

Tomorrow is going to be EPIC AS FUCK. Waking up at 5 am to go hiking with AE girl and 3 other friends. Get back, shower, and go to the EPIC 20 person karaoke thing I organized, where we all drive down to Denver, eat Vietnamese food, and then rent a family / Asian style karaoke room where we KILL IT for the rest of the night.

I'm PUMPED!

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 25, 2015 7:45 am 
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Quote:
It's okay, though, everyone has to learn this for themselves the hard way.

I learned that with LM girl last summer, who was chasing me hard so I thought it would be okay to just tell her we should date. NOPE

I also learned that summer that even if a girl really likes you, you can't just lunge mouth rape make out with her in public. Who knew? MP girl, a gorgeous Asian girl, taught me that lesson.
Why not brah?

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 26, 2015 4:22 pm 
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Can't tell if that was a troll or not...

Hiked a big-ass mountain with AE girl, EF girl, and 2 others yesterday and then went karaoke-ing with AE girl, MS girl, AG girl, AP girl, DY bro, JK bro, IJ bro, VL girl, and 8 of VL girl's friends. HOLY SHIT what a day.

I'm starting to feel more lackluster about AE girl. The thing is, yes she's super cute, yes she's fun, but she's SO DAMN AWKWARD around me. I can feel it bringing down my state every time I interact with her. It was especially apparent while the rest of my social circle was interacting with me. We're loud, boisterous, making fun of everything, and talking the whole time. With AE girl, it's quieter, more innocent, and we can't connect on deeper things like AG girl and I can because she's hesitant to share those with me.

I do enjoy it when she shares personal things or tells me things about herself, and when she goofs off around me, but those will usually be with a big group. I think she's just nervous being one-on-one with me. Whatever, I don't give a shit.

Since my residency petition and book shit are finished, I'll have a lot more time this next week, which means more time to work on videos, delivering value, and learning web design. Yes!

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 27, 2015 7:26 pm 
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So yesterday, I had a talk with AE girl. I feel like a lotta dudes on this forum haven't the faintest clue what the fuck to do in a relationship, and the last two days have been chock full of case studies. With 9+ years of relationship experience, I'm somewhat of a guru in this department. Pay close attention if you ever want a steady girlfriend or a wife, for that matter...

I wanted to bring up the issue of comfort up with AE girl, so I sent her this text:
"Hey! I wanna talk to you about something. You got some free time today?" -Notice, it's upbeat, with the exclamation mark. I don't want her to think it's going to be some bad thing.

She sends back:
"Okay, I have to go into the lab later today. Porque?" -I know from the inquiry as to why we should meet that she's concerned it's something bad. It's reasonable to think so, whenever you're in a relationship and the other person says they want to talk, it usually means there's something they're not happy with.

I don't want her to worry about it being bad, so I send her:
"It's not anything bad, don't worry, just want to talk about it in person"

She sends back:
"Okayyy. I'll let you know when I finish feeding the mice (it will probably be later this afternoon)"

We meet, and instead of making her feel defensive or putting the blame on her ("Do you feel like you're more uncomfortable when it's just me and you, as opposed to in a group, why don't you feel more comfortable around me?"), I structure the conversation so that it's fostering good emotions, and instead I put the spotlight on myself:
"Is there something I'm doing that's making you more uncomfortable when it's just us two?" "What can I do to help you feel more comfortable?"

I let her know that I still like her and want to keep dating her. She tells me she really likes me, that she hasn't ever felt this way about anyone. I ask her if she's scared at all about the physical stuff. She says yes, because she's new to the whole relationship thing. I tell her that I want her to feel comfortable putting the brakes on the physical stuff and saying "no" to me, and that I already to pay attention to her body language. I tell her I can tell when she stiffens up, and I know it's a red light area, and that I will always respect her boundaries. That being said, I am still attracted to her and want to be physical with her. She breathes a sigh of relief and thanks me, that that really helps, and that one of the reasons she was more hesitant to hang out is that things might get out of hand.

Guys, remember this: Invalidating someone's feelings will ALWAYS make that person feel defensive and not like you. EVERYONE is entitled to feel the way they do, and you will never ever make that person feel better by telling them, "Why do you feel that way? You shouldn't feel that way, why don't you just do this and that'll fix your problem! It's so easy, just stop thinking about it like that, it's totally not a big deal!"

Instead, to make someone feel better, you should empathize: "I totally get why you feel that way. Once, I had the same exact thing happen to me, blah blah blah I felt the exact same way. It's completely normal to feel this way, anyone in your situation would feel like that." They'll instantly start feeling better. You'll see this in action later in this post.

The talk goes well, and I can feel that we have way more rapport after it, and that we feel a lot closer. She drives me to the Alley Cat, where we spend three hours having a study party (she does math, I do lab stuff). Afterwards, I take her to the foothills overlooking the city at night, and we walk around, arm in arm, making out a bit, and we have more relaxed, comfortable conversation. I can tell she's feeling a lot more comfortable around me now.

She suggests we watch a movie at my place. We put on the Goofy Movie (hilarious, by the way) and proceed to start making out halfway through. We're both getting really into it, and it's escalating. I'm getting on top of her, our hands are roaming, and we're both getting turned on. She's kissing and biting my neck, and it feels really good.

The movie ends. We keep making out. I take my shirt off. We go to second. We're dry humping through our clothes. She guides my hand into her pants, I start playing with her lady bits. I lead her to the bedroom. I continue playing with her parts, she commences heavy breathing. I tell her it would be easier if we took her pants off, but she says "no" to that. She tells me to get on my back. She straddles me and dry humps me. We stop after a bit, and she starts panicking emotionally.

She tells me that she's gone too far, and she starts crying. I hold her. I ask her if she wants to go outside and talk about it, she says yes. We sit outside, it's like 1 am at this point. She tells me she has to tell me something, and it has to do with why she's so new to the whole dating thing. When she was young (kindergarden through 2nd grade), she was caught playing "boyfriend and girlfriend" with a boy. They didn't know what they were doing because they were so young, but she harbors a lot of guilt and shame from that episode, and it's affected her entire life. That shame and guilt comes back whenever she gets physical with a guy. She sees herself as pure and pristine, and wanted to wait until marriage, so she feels embarrassed, ashamed, and resentful at herself for breaking her own rules.

I basically just listen and empathize, and tell her about people in the Mormon church that get molested when they're young, and how they harbor a lot of shame and guilt about sex into their adult lives. I tell her there's nothing wrong with what she did, there's nothing wrong with having those feelings, and that wanting to be sexual and physical makes her normal, not weird. She says she tries to tell herself that, but those feelings of guilt and shame are still there. I listen some more, and hold her while she cries.

After a bit, I suggest we go grab some late night junk food. We drive to Mcdonalds and get a big Mac, fries, and a smoothie. I tell her I have a lot of guilt and shame whenever I eat Mcdonalds, yet here I am. She smiles and giggles. I start cracking jokes and she starts feeling better. We get back and I pig out, crack more jokes about me being obese. She starts feeling better. We have a deep conversation about science, life, aliens, and other crazy shit. She feels better and heads home around 2:30 am.

The next morning, she texts me again around 8:30: "I feel so embarassed and ashamed right now... I can't shake this feeling." I call her and find out she's at BSB (on campus). I grab some food and meet her there after doing my morning shit. We find a spot, and I hold her hand and listen to her again. She tells me she feels like she broke her own rules, and was angry at herself. She feels ashamed that my roommates might know, and might judge her. I assured her that my roommates were huge sluts and would not judge her. She tells me she's really conflicted, and that she wants to face this problem of hers, but also wants to run away from it. I tell her it's completely normal to feel sexual feelings, that that's what we are all programmed to do. I tell her about the time my roommate walked in on me and a girl having sex, she finds the story hilarious. I tell her that she shouldn't feel ashamed of this part of her, that that's something that exists in EVERY SINGLE ORGANISM ON THE PLANET. It's okay to feel sexual. Except I deliver it a bit nicer than that.

She starts feeling better. I tell her maybe it wouldn't be so hard if I wasn't so charming. She laughs and tells me it doesn't help :). We start joking back and forth, and she starts feeling a lot better. She holds my hand and tells me she really appreciates it that I listened to her and made her feel better. I am A GOD at this. I am a freaking gift to the women on this earth that I have this ability to take a negative emotional state in them and flip it around so consistently.

I have lab stuff, so we hug goodbye with the understanding that at 2 I'll give her a lift back to her place. She qualifies me a bunch, telling me a bunch of things she likes about me, which I'll spare you of.

BOOM that's how it's done. A master class in handling and flipping a female's negative emotional state. Do yourself a favor and learn how to do this, you'll deliver so much more value to the females in your life, and make you so much better and more capable of a man. Ning out.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2015 2:56 pm 
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This week's been solid!

Wednesday I played softball with AG girl, met her whole team (she invited me to fill in for someone). They obviously love me, and wanted me to play with them for the fall. Boom, 12 new friends just like that.

In social circle situations, you've got acquaintances that graduate into friends that graduate into BFF yolo hang out awesome friends. AG girl would be the latter. We gossip about our love lives together, we always have fun and laugh when we're together, and we've got crazy rapport because we've shared everything there is to share about our love lives together. And honestly guys, AG girl is an attractive girl, but I don't even think of her in that way because I LOVE having her as a BFF friend.

Once someone graduates into becoming your BFF friend from being just a normal friend, you basically absorb their entire social circle into your own.

It didn't hurt that baseball was my first sport and I kicked ass on the diamond ;) Golly, I'm so modest too.

Thursday AE girl and I went on a romantic sunset hike, and things are at an unprecedented level of comfort and rapport. We took some cutesy pics, laughed and shared stories the whole time. At the top, I slow things down, turn her face towards me, and start kissing her slowly and sensually. She reacts strongly to every kiss. I pull back and tell her she's very distracting. She says, "Look who's talking." :)

Afterwards, we went to Wendy's and she told me her past relationship story while I shared the EPIC HS girl love story.

HS girl had wanted to visit me in September. She knew about AE girl because I had been updating her on the situation, and as soon as I told her that I actually liked AE girl, she reacted with jealousy. Her plans to come visit from NY became more and more real, and before she was buying the ticket she was asking me what I thought. It's obviously a weird situation for AE girl, and I gave HS girl an ultimatum:

If she wanted to fly out and visit me in September and things with AE girl were still good (which it was looking like right now), she could only come strictly as friends. That meant:
1. She couldn't stay at my house. She tried to compromise into "camping in my backyard" but I said no to that as well.
2. No physical stuff, no couple-y stuff whatsoever.
3. And I wouldn't ditch AE girl that weekend, that we would have to hang out the three of us together.

It was a take it or leave it. After a lot of hemming, hawing, and trying to compromise, HS girl decides not to come, which is a decision I completely respect. I tell AE girl all of this in addition to the rest of the saga, and she tells me she thinks HS girl is kind of a crazy bitch and is glad she's not coming to visit (as expected).

Sharing the love stories builds massive rapport, and AE girl and I feel closer than ever. It's only been 5 weeks in, and I think the girl's falling in love with me. Which is great, because I actually like her! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

Late thursday night KF girl drunk texts me, asking me if I wanted to run at 6:30 the next morning. Here's the text interaction:

Her: Run horse tooth at 630??

Me: Tomorrow morning?

Her: Yeah!

Me: Oh man, too early for me, enjoy though, thanks for the invite!

Her: It's not too early! And you'll have a nice start to the day!

Me: Oh man... I might regret this mightily

Her: No you won't! Come on! It'll be fun! We can even grab a burrito or something!

Me: Hahahaha okay okay fine I'll go

Her: Yeee! I can drive!

Me: Hahahahahaha ok, I'll be ready at 6:30

We go running the next morning, but I keep things casual. Despite KF girl being awesome and fun and gorgeous, I ACTUALLY like AE girl. It's crazy. KF girl tells me if I'm out in old town that night to shoot her a text. I do go to old town, and dance and sing my ass off with MS girl, MC bro, AG girl, AG girl's Maryland friend, AG girl's tennis bro romantic interest, and Z bro. Completely forget to text KF girl (too busy having fun). AE girl was in Denver going to an Eli Young band concert with her best friend. She blows up my phone with pics and texts about her concert, I respond accordingly. A great night!

Tonight MS girl and I are having people over for a potluck into a campfire party. Here's the event description on Facebook:

Potluck Pandemonium
Haven't had one of these in awhile, time for another. Bring a mouth watering dish, alcohol if you are going to drink, and chairs for sitting around the fireplace after. I LOVE SUMMER!

Between MS girl and I, we invited 74 people. Absolutely insane.

The only thing I want to change for next week is that I've been slacking slightly on my productivity. I think it's because I've gotten complacent, and having AE girl around is so nice and comfortable. I WILL turn this around this week.

I HAVE been getting back into shape. Leadville 100 ultramarathon is going to happen in a year, and I can feel my body getting stronger with every run.

One of the more important things that I learned this week involving girls this week... and disclaimer, it's for high level guys only:

Honesty is honestly almost always the best policy. Have standards for yourself that you hold highly. Stick to them. Then unapologetically let girls know that this is who you are and how you do things. If they can't deal with that, then that's okay. Your standards are more important than hers. If you stick to YOUR standards, you're basically telling your own brain that you love yourself. Incredibly sexy to women. If you bend and lie or sneak information around to achieve a certain result with a women, not only is it unfair to her, but it's unfair to YOU. You're basically telling yourself that you care about a certain result, you care about this girl more than you care about yourself or your standards. AKA you hate yourself. Not badass behavior.

Being completely open to HS girl about AE girl, being open to AE girl about HS girl, and being stalwart about not doing anything in terms of escalation with KF girl, are all examples of this. Funny thing is, it's so counter-intuitive, but being so open makes each girl chase me and want me even harder.

It's just another example of how at high levels of "game", it's way more about embracing who you are as a man, stripping away the layers, and personal development than it is about what lines to say or how I get this girl to drop her panties. It's more about BECOMING a man of value and integrity rather than IMITATING one. For example:

Do you go to the gym so you can get muscles and sleep with women? Or do you go because you love your body and want to treat it well?

Do you dress well to impress girls? Or do you dress well because it makes you feel like a badass?

Do you deliver that funny line because you want to make girls laugh and make them like you? Or do you do it because you LOVE making girls laugh and you LOVE making yourself laugh?

All food for thought.

I saw MC bro running around being all pick-up-artist-y last night at the bars, and talked about it with MS girl. She told me that when he was hitting on her, it didn't make her feel special or good, that it felt like she was expendable, and that she could've really just been any set of boobs and vagina.

It's another example of honesty and not imitation. Girls respond to perceived sub-communicated STATUS signals. Being successful at pick-up involves being able to replicate all these status signals in a short amount of time, but cold-approaching girls is (almost always) an inherently a low-status behavior. She's not qualified to meet you other than being physically appealing. She hasn't done anything other than spend time on her hair, makeup, and wardrobe. Why does she get all your attention when you should be out having fun with friends?

Honestly guys, think of cold approach as practice. Don't go into every situation trying to stick your dick into something you don't even like (low status). Think of it as practice, as getting your body language down, your eye contact down, your vocal tonality down, and your state control immaculate (high status).

Instead of trying to replicate and imitate all the signals of a high status male, why not actually work towards BECOMING a high status male?

This is why I love social circle game. Basically everyone in town knows me. I talk with everyone, I don't have to "manufacture" preselection or social value. I already AM high status because I know so many people and so many people know me. I don't go meet and cold approach girls, girls get introduced to me.

Work on your social skills. Work on your physical / emotional / mental health. Work on your career. DO IT EVERY DAY.

Ning out

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2015 6:21 pm 
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Good stuff here.

You're right on point with a few things that I've harped on over the years.

Cold-approach = low-value being one of them. I think you and I view this the same way. I view cold-approach as being a skill-builder (i.e. "training" with zero social consequences) and an insurance policy (i.e. girl in line next to you at Starbucks).

I've always said this: if you're out and about in the context of something you'd be doing anyway and you see a hot girl, go talk to her. I believe there's power in that.

But to "go out daygaming" or "night sarging" with the sole intention of stopping girls in the street or the mall or whatever is...
A) a horrible use of your time. There are way better things to do with life.
B) very low-value and non-abundant. Does Bradley Cooper have to do that? Of course not.
C) Creepy. You are literally on the hunt.
D) Something a loser does he has no opportunity cost in doing so (i.e. his life has little else going on so there's nothing lost by spending 3 hours running girls down on the sidewalk).

The other thing I love that you mentioned here is honesty.

From the initial escalation to setting relationship boundaries, it's the key. In escalation, by being verbally up-front, we are expressing honesty. In relationship, by communicating intentions and what we want out of the relationship, we are being honest. Sincerity, being genuine, being authentic. That's the name of the game.

Example: I never cheated on my girlfriend. A few of my bros were baffled by this, given the level of promiscuity I displayed to literally the day before I agreed to be exclusive with her. To me it was more about integrity and honesty and being a man. Right now, for example, I have no intention of being exclusive given the state of location-independence my life will be under for the next few years. Every girl I date or hook-up with knows this.

I think the issue is a lot of guys view this as being "soft." Here's a counterpoint to that: if my current intention is just to be a sexual fiend, fucking all sorts of girls, being unapologetically aggressive and dominant... isn't being up-front about that pretty badass? Yes, and it's also very sincere and honest.

Incidentally, I just ordered the book "Daring Greatly" on my Kindle this week. It's all about this concept, specifically being vulnerable. I think it will basically confirm my previous "model" that being a great man is about being some sort of powerful, dominant, sexual beast mixed in with a heart of gold. I'm excited to read it.

OK end rant. You touched on something that I'm very passionate about and that I think it more-or-less one of the central pieces of toxicity in how guys learn to relate to girls.

You da man.


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2015 7:50 pm 
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Thanks for the feedback, appreciate it! I'm glad we think along the same wavelength for these concepts!

Here's the video on my morning routine (a very simple 2 minute meditation technique):

https://youtu.be/nQZPvmsJU3Q

And another on how to feel more comfortable and carefree in social settings:

https://youtu.be/6jddcjLSXy4

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2015 5:40 pm 
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I can do better. This week I'm going to be more productive. I'm going to run more. I'm going to structure my time better. I'm going to write down my goals and visualize them more.

When I get complacent, I watch a Jason Capital video. It PUMPS me up again, and I'm ready to charge down my path. I'm going to make this part of my routine. First meal of every day, I'll watch a 20 min segment. I'm rewatching his Social God program at the moment.

Last night's potluck when fantastically. ~30 people came, with good food, music, and laughs all around. I want to pare this social circle down now. I want ONLY THE BEST people in it. Only the most energetic, the most fun, the best influences.

That means:

AE girl- my main girl. Blossoming into the social butterfly that she's meant to be. Ever since we've been hanging out she's been more and more social, running more and more, and happier and more confident.

AG girl- bff. Always high energy, always happy and laughing.

AP girl- bff. Always joking, making troll comments, and being hilarious.

Z bro- my boi. Confident. A gentleman. Sexual. Not afraid to escalate on girls. Always fun. Someone I can definitely learn from.

KF girl- always running. Pushes me athletically

And virtual influences-

Jason Capital- obvi

Daniel Balboa- into personal development, has the escalation skills / mindset I want to learn from

Hodgetwins- absolutely hilarious

This section needs to grow. I need to get my reading on

Most other people are mediocre influences. You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.

This means I want to cut down on time spent with:

MC bro- too many drugs. Too creepy with girls

NS girl- a terrible influence. always negative, always in scarcity mindset

At the party, I sat with AE girl almost the entire time. I spent the last couple hours sitting on a blanket with her next to the firepit teaching her guitar. She was the giggling, carefree, happy girl that all girls in the world should be, all the time. During the after party clean up, while everyone left to check out another party on the street, I picked her up, carried her to a wall, and smooched the crap out of her. We broke it off when everyone came back.

She went back home, and texts me an assortment of gooey messages:

"You :) Make :) Me :) Smile! :)"

"Lol, I like you"

":) I had a lot of fun tonight"

"Dang it, Ning! I'm so happy. Stahp"

I text her:

"You are making me want to smooch the crap out of you. Not conducive to sleep! Stop being so cute"

We say goodnight, and she texts:

"Buenas noches. Good luck trying to fall asleep. I know I'll be struggling to"

I text: "You're not tired?"

Her: "I'm quite tired. But. I'm also quite happy. My thoughts are distracted by a certain person. Gah, so inconsiderate"

Me: "That person must be quite amazing"

Hahahahaha sigh, I think I'm falling in that big pile of fluffy poo known as love with this girl. Why's she gotta be so cute?

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 04, 2015 2:35 pm 
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The disgusting love dance continues.

Yesterday I work in the lab as usual. AE girl texts me to ask how my day is going, and I respond that it's fantastic (when is it not?). I tell her that the lab on the other side of the wall asked me to turn down my music (true story). She laughs cuz I'm hilarious.

After lunch (watched JC videos), a meeting, and some more lab work, KF girl texts me to go running. Hell yeah. Right before we leave AE girl texts, letting me know she'll be at the Alley Cat if I want to join for a study party. I tell her I have running plans and will text her after.

KF girl and I run 4 miles up a mountain, 2 miles down, and 3 miles around back to the car. I'm ABSOLUTELY wiped because I'm freaking out of shape and KF girl is speedy. Good, this is going to get me back into shape. KF girl tells me she loves running with me because I'm always down to run, even if I'm tired. Say YES to adventure people! It doesn't matter if you're tired or not feeling it or not motivated. Just do it!

I drop KF girl off and text AE girl. I meet up with her and her friend EF girl outside Spanish club. I sit down and start conversing. AE girl starts giggling and laughing. We say goodbye to EF girl and go grab some Noodles and Co. (so delicious!) We hold hands. We laugh. We share stories.

She's got the rest of the night free and needs a ride home later. I invite her over to play some music. I bring her home, shower, and bring her into the backyard, where we have a lovely little jam session. We play a bunch of songs, she's got a good voice, just not confident about it. She's impressed that I can listen to a song once and play it by ear. I think it's pretty impressive, too. I tell her that it hasn't come without hours of sitting in front of a radio, sounding out songs (true story). She believes it.

A couple of the songs have the phrase "I love you" in them. She stumbles across those and gets nervous hahahahahaha. I just sing it out loud like a gangsta cuz I don't give two shits. She takes it as a signal that it's ok and sings those parts too.

After a bunch of songs, we talk about jamming more in the future. She's going to bring her violin. I'm going to transcribe some parts for her. I can tell she loves these, cuz she's awesome and nerdy like that.

I put the guitar down, caress her face, and bring her in. We smooch. It starts raining, we go inside. We put on the second half of the Goofy movie and cuddle on the couch to watch it.

In the middle I look down and whisper softly, "Hey Amanda." She looks up. "Yeah?"

"Have I told you yet that I like you yet?" She smiles, and whispers back, "I like you too. A lot."

I kiss her. She kisses me back. We have a fantastic makeout session. The movie ends. We continue making out. I take my shirt off. I put her hands on my butt. She strokes my abs lightly, like she wants to put her hands in my pants, but she doesn't. I just enjoy it, no rush. I stroke her legs. Kiss her neck. Start touching her shoulders and collarbone. She unhooks her bra and replaces it with my hand. She's got a fantastic body, perfect breasts. I'm on cloud 9. She starts sucking my nipples. We're both breathing heavily.

A loud noise from one my roommates going to the bathroom! We laugh, giggle, and she says, "I should probably go home." I say, "Yeah, it's getting late." I kiss her. She kisses me back. She's very responsive to me being physical with her. I pull back, and we stare meaningfully into each others eyes for a bit. She puts her head on my shoulder. She looks up at me and says, "I can't get you out of my head. I'm thinking about you, like all the time." I tell her the same.

We smooch some more. I tell her it's so hard to resist her. She tells me, "you too". Finally another noise breaks the spell and we peace out. I drive her home. We exchange "I really like you"'s. She tells me she really likes the fact that I'm athletic, and that we can run, play soccer, and play basketball together. She also tells me she really likes the fact that I'm musical, and LOVES our little music jam sessions. I smile and tell her it's been a crazy summer. In front of her house, I pull her in and kiss her. I tell her good night. She tells me, "See you tomorrow sometime. It has to happen." I swoon.

This girl is SO DAMN CUTE! It feels close to that point where you say, "I love you," but it's only been...6 weeks? All that damn work. All that kaizen-ing. Then suddenly one day, you realize you're where you want to be. Crazy.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:45 am 
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Legs a bit tired today. I'm eating like a Mack truck with diarrhea these days. Running more boosts the metabolism, yo.

After lab work and sitting in on VL girl's research presentation, I take a nap. KF girl had apparently left her bag in my car. Whether it was accidental or purposeful, I'm not quite sure. Her subcoms tell me it was accidental, but never underestimate girls to do some crazy shit. She tells me she'll swing by to pick it up.

I wake up from my early afternoon nap, and the dog's barking. KF girl is outside, I open the door and greet her. She comes over, pets the dog, and walks in the house without me inviting her in. I'm in a daze cuz I just woke up. We have some short conversation, and it seems like she's waiting for something. I don't kiss her. I don't show her around the house. There's a pause, and then we say goodbye, still on a cheery note. She mentions that she might run before work, and it looks like she's half inviting me. My legs are shot, and I don't mention joining.

Instead, I hit up the gym and do my pecs / triceps / shoulders day routine. Throw in an ab exercise at the end for good measure. Eat a shitload of food. AE girl is watching an opera with her dad tonight, which is good, it gives me time to figure out what the hell I'm doing in terms of business. Plus, we've been hanging out like every day. Taking a break is a good thing.

After a long deliberation, I'm ditching the tutoring idea. Looking long term, customers won't stand around after the specific semester or 4 years they're in school. They'll have no need for the information. I'd rather start something that will keep the customers around for life, something that's going to have a bigger, more proven market base.

My new idea that's cooking:

I'm going to write an eBook detailing how to go about gaining more social confidence, increasing your social circle, and improving your ability to persuade / influence others, and using these newfound skills to improve all areas of your life, including career-wise and dating.

The advantages about writing instead of using video include:

1. less money (camera shit be expensive, yo)
2. can write anywhere, recording requires lighting / backdrop / etc.
3. creates a more entry-level product, allows me to make future video products to upsell
4. can write while in boring ass lectures / seminars

Honestly, this PhD shit isn't even intellectually challenging to me. I've been at the school / academic game for so freaking long that I'm a master at bullshitting, which is all education really is. It's a game. Everything's a game, you just have to figure out how to play it. Life is game.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 05, 2015 6:35 pm 
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Here's the deal with cold approach pick-up and social circle game. These are BOTH skill sets that are useful to have. Here are the differences:

Cold approach pick-up advantages:

1. Gives you steel balls my forcing you to learn how to deal with approach anxiety and rejection.
2. High volume (provided you live in a dense enough area), so the amount of practice you can do is (almost) completely up to you. For this reason, it has the potential for the biggest growth in terms of skills and confidence. If you want to get better fast, go out 7 nights a week. Otherwise, stop complaining about random shit that doesn't matter.
3. Teaches you how to manage, amp, and control your state well
4. Great for practice with humor, self-amusement, body language, eye contact, vocal tonality
5. Opportunities for lots of naked time with random women

Cold approach pick-up disadvantages:

1. Not practical in a low density area.
2. Inherently a low status behavior, the worst way to meet women. It automatically puts you into the chasing frame and her in the power frame, and she knows it. Gives the girl too much value based purely on her looks / outfit. She doesn't have to qualify herself at all. Have to play all sorts of weird games and gambits to flip the power frame.
3. The quality of women you meet is generally low. Quality women usually don't constantly hang out in night clubs and bars. Because of this, you might have to burn through 10 different women to meet one you maybe kind of sort of like.
4. Generally considered weird and creepy by society. It kind of teaches dudes to be weird and creepy (depending on the subcoms you put off)

Social circle game advantages (how naturals get good):

1. You make actual human connections to people that you like. You make actual friends with people of both genders. You have meaningful, long lasting relationships with people.
2. Your life will consist of cool events and activities that you enjoy, instead of spending all your social time in night clubs and bars.
3. You'll have more business and social connections, know more people, and you'll be higher status.
4. Women get introduced to you, instead of you approaching women. This puts them in the chasing frame and you in the power frame. They have to qualify in order to meet you, otherwise, if you don't like them, you just don't invite them to things. This is a much better, easier, and higher status way of meeting women (and getting laid).
5. The women (and men) you meet are higher quality, more awesome, share more interests with you, and in general are people that you actually want to spend time with instead of rando-s. This means the females you spend naked time with might actually be cool people, so this is more conducive to relationship-forming (whether you're into that or not)
6. Teaches you how to interact like a normal human being (whether you want to be normal or not)
7. Both socially acceptable and admired

Social circle game disadvantages:

1. Can't burn every interaction to the ground, so you can't really test the limits of what is possible and what isn't without freaking everyone out. Harder and slower to learn and socially calibrate escalation.
2. A little bit (but not that much) more restrictive in terms of how much practice and social time you can accumulate. This means you can still work on your subcoms (body language, vocal tonality, eye contact, etc. etc.) but at a slightly slower rate.
3. More time and effort intensive than cold approach pick-up. Instead of just swagging out and hitting the town, you have to send invites and organize events.
4. Less impressive at a high level than someone who is really good at cold-approach pick-up (if you care about impressing people)

So there ya go. Keep that in mind as you go about your business. If this makes sense and you want to hear more of my musings, check this out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jddcjLSXy4

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