July 29th 2014
Takeaway List Revised.
1/18/14
Be courageous. Act on physical urges.
Think about logistics. Determine the type of relationship you want to have with the girl and her social group. If you want a purely physical relationship, act accordingly.
Anyone can be a wingman. There is power in isolating (having 1 on 1 interactions) and bouncing locations.
2/19/14
No matter what happens, you will always have yourself.
Open sets with the subtext that you are trying to determine if they are people worth having in your social circle. If they ultimately are not, then proceed without them.
If you want to pursue a particular girl, then be congruent with what you want and see if there is romantic chemistry. If there isn't, then it is a matter of incompatibility and not performance.
2/24/14
Strive to be uninhibited. This is done by managing emotions.
If you choose to live life as a game, make sure it is at least fun.
There is something to be said about shaping perceptions. PUA refers to this as "frame control". Believe strongly in your own frame, while considering others. At the end of the day, your are ultimately the only thing that matters. This empowering belief helps me overcome my own personal insecurities.
Create your own reality and strive to be comfortable with yourself...if you believe that you are an Icy Zen Master then fuck everyone else's perspective. If they disagree they are simply wrong. (Empowering vs. limiting beliefs).
There will be a period of time where you feel like you are "not being yourself" when you apply new belief systems. This is because you won't be acting like your current self...you'll be acting like the man you ultimately want to become.
"Game" everyone. If they interest you then you can choose to invite them into your reality.
Reframe rejection. Laugh and learn. Learning from the weakest moments and tightening my game will mold me.
2/29/14
Daygame structure
This was the daygame structure that worked for me when I was doing a lot of college campus daygame.
1. Open
If there is something compelling in the environment then go situational. If you have nothing to go off of, simply say "This is random but I thought you were cute and had to talk to you."
2. Rapport
Build rapport off of why she is there or what she is doing. Make assumptions about her ("You look like you workout". "You look like you read a lot".) Something I should have done better would have been planting the seed to why we should go out on date sometime. Try to establish a mutual interest or activity to lead into the close.
3. Close
I would eventually hit a point where the girl is like "Okay random stranger, what's your endgame here?" When I started to get that vibe, I would establish a time constraint (Hey I gotta meet my brother, I should get your number though so we can do <mutual interest that I discovered> sometime"
3/3/14
Act assertively and without fear of losing the person/thing at hand. What I have found is that in my own life, I tend to do things more stifled and timidly to avoid stepping on peoples shoes. Ironically, this avoidant approach hurts worse than being too aggressive/forward. The personal example that inspired this post was when I played it safe with Mellow Mushroom girl and she ended up getting into a relationship. Failure>Growth>Success. Be courageous and disregard "reputation" because if you are embracing right action (don't be a dick), then your goal is justified. Keep relationships intact while expressing yourself to your fullest extent (make sure you treat yourself right first).
3/9/14
You can't be a by-product of the world around you. At the end of the day, the only person you truly have to answer to is yourself. Stop and ask yourself if YOU can live with yourself.
3/10/14
The Cool Guy Mindset relies on self validation. You move through life accomplishing personal goals and seeking your mission and when you find girls that interest you along your path, you have the tools and strategies to know how to attract her. You approach when you want to. Even if you learn how to project "non-neediness", you are still trying to fill a void. To distill this, Jason Capital makes an excellent point about cold approach. COLD APPROACH IS THE WORST WAY TO MEET WOMEN. Don't make more work for yourself than necessary. Salesman start off doing door to door shit to get started. However, the goal is to become the CEO and have clients coming to YOU...not the other way around.
3/15/14
The typical person will do more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure.
Define your non-negotiables and never let anyone violate them.
Acknowledge the limiting beliefs that enter your mind. Don't try to push the anxiety away...embrace it and carry on with the approach.
Not everyone has to like you. You can make yourself look like a fucking lunatic and it won't even put a dent in the universe...nobody gives a fuck about you.
3/17/14
The only power you can have through cold approach is being responsible for YOUR own emotions and playing the numbers.
3/18/14
As of tonight, I will never allow myself to get robbed again.
In the initial stages of courtship, dating is a fucking competition. There are winners and losers. Girls aren't gonna stick around because you're a nice guy.
The guy that pulls is the guy that wins.
When you are in a bar, nobody has any idea of how you know each other. Use this to your advantage. Never assume that the guy the chick is with is her boyfriend until SHE confirms it. This was a pretty angsty post, and I was obviously emotional when I wrote it. That being said, I won't completely discredit it. If you set a personal goal, follow it to the hilt...no matter what it may be. Negotiate your emotions...can you live with yourself if you let said goal slip? How much do you want said goal? Are you putting other people's wants/needs above your own?
3/19/14
You can become good with women/people by micro managing impressions. (Using scripted lines, analyzing text game, etc). Eventually though, you should try to build a lifestyle where you are a high status male that simply doesn't have time to give all the cat's chasing him his ball of yarn.
I also want to try to open sets differently in night game. I want to try to casually open a lot of sets, eject, and then reopen later.
3/20/14
Don't ever take anything in game (or even life for the most part) personally if you don't have to.
3/22/14
I gotta go unfiltered and if they think I'm a freak, then whatever. I also need to condense dates more (as far as time goes).
Avoid using the word need. Avoid using the word sorry.
Try out phone calls verse texting...even if it makes you uncomfortable.
How do you eliminate flakes and get girls to chase? By having unshakable inner game as well as building the strongest and most authentic emotional connection in the initial interactions/texts. Its not about you or her or your personality...its about your interactions.
Always honor your own word. If you tell a flake that if she wants to see you again she has to ask you, then don't go back on it.
3/27/14
Roll in the club and open 3 sets of guys
Approach 5 sets of girls in 15 minutes
Try to merge as many sets as possible and have the girls do the heavy lifting for you
Once you have all this social proof and momentum built, start isolating the girls you want
3/30/14
Do whatever you can to turn a cold approach into a warm approach. Don't expect things to go perfect if you don't put in pre-approach work.
Experiment with giving girls my phone number
Get better at story telling
Be unashamed about escalation. An extreme example of this is VP's naked method. Things that you wouldn't think would work sometimes do.
3/31/14
I've said it before and I'll say it again. I have to go for what I want and not care what the chick ultimately thinks about me. They have flaked up to this point regardless.
Playing it safe does not fucking work for me. It is time to be overly aggressive just in the name of experimentation.
I want to a tight enough rotation so that I don't have to spend my Sunday night at a dirty strip club.
If I ask a girl on a date, I don't want to be friends. I already have friends. I'm 22 years old. I want to fuck as soon as possible. If she wants a relationship out of it than she can vie for it. Now removed from this post, I find it to be pretty dramatic. Again, I will stand by the fact that I hate strip clubs. I also stand by the concept of experimentation. Pretend you are your favorite actor and try out different personas. Contrary to popular belief, personalities are more flexible than you think. If you want to fuck a girl, then play the game appropriately. If you want something more, play the game appropriately.
4/3/14
Remember that natural chemistry is something that can't be faked. Don't get hung up over girls that you don't connect with. There is something to be said about having a chemistry with someone. Chemistry encompasses a lot of different things.
4/9/14
Put your mission first, and everything else secondary.
4/13/14
Honor the three strikes rule. Develop personal rules and stick to them.
Build that high status lifestyle (for yourself...always put your passions/needs first)
Don't underestimate the power of social circle
Always do things on your own terms.
4/15/14
Go into dates with a false time constraint...I've noticed that in all of my dates it is always the chick that ends up saying she has to go. If I'm going to try and pull then I should attempt it...if not then end the date on my terms.
I think some girls are actually pretty busy and truly don't have time to date. (I remember being pretty busy myself when I was going to school and working). Don't always assume girls are just purposefully blowing you off or are getting barraged with other guys dicking them.
4/19/14
The bolder man always wins.
Adding chicks you are trying to get at on Facebook can be beneficial because you can get insight into their personal lives...most importantly their current relationship status.
I'd say most flaking post cold approach is because of social ties you have no idea about going in (ex boyfriends/other guys)
Get girls you want hooked ASAP. Respect Murphy's Law...anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Prepare accordingly.
4/22/14
The next time I find myself in a dead set, I should have more fun with it. Go experimental. Say whatever you want (you should do this anyway) but especially because they already made up their mind that they don't want to fuck you. To add to this, hold onto life loosely.
4/24/14
There is a difference between being persistent and being harassing. Don't be afraid to push the envelope, but know when to back down.
4/25/14
Don't be afraid to put someone in their place if it is deserved. I was offering that chick free drinks in the exchange that she simply shows up to my bar and she was being stuck up. If you facilitate that sense of entitlement that society reinforces towards those types of women, you are being a chode. Be aware of what people want and their motivations. Establish what you want and establish what they want and find the middle ground. Its really that simple. Be aware that many girls enjoy validation with out putting out. Be aware that guys enjoy sex as a means of validation.
4/28/14
I am losing the battle to AA. To overcome it I am adopting a new rule. When I see a chick that registers as a yes, stop and look at her head to toe. Ask myself if I would feel a twinge of disappointment if I never saw her again. If the answer is yes, approach and accept the worst possible consequences.
As a man, I have no choice but to be the pursuer...initially. This goes back to sales and life in general. Whenever you start something new, it is going to suck. You are going to have to accept that you are going to be low on the totem pole, and you have to enjoy the process of getting to where you want to be.
4/30/14
We found a new spot that we are gonna try to game more. Me and VP both admire that street game. Go back to giving less fucks. Cold approach at the end of the day is best way to meet more women in my opinion. Don't neglect building social circles but embrace cold approach for what it is.
5/15/14
I have to kick up the assertiveness...especially in night game. I got so close to being robbed. You could argue that I was robbed, but I don't really want to count it. The only thing that gets me off the hook was that homeboy ended up blowing out. Lickitung ended up self-destructing...just like I had feared she would.
If you are going to pull and you know you have the green light from the girl, PULL IMMEDIATELY DON'T STOP TO FOR A SINGLE THING. Every second that goes by is an invitation for chaos.
If you find yourself in a similar situation and the girl in questions is in limbo, UNDERSTAND THAT SHE CAN FLIP LIKE A PANCAKE. If she a shinier toy catches her eye, you could be done. I still remember this situation happening. It comes back to my belief in frame control. Frame control boils down to self esteem. Someone with high self esteem treats themselves with the same respect they treat other people with. They are able to let people know when they are disrespecting them without getting overly emotional about it. Also evaluate the context of where you are interacting with people. Certain environments tend to attract certain demographics. Certain demographics tend to act a certain way.
5/19/14
How to prevent the robbery
Ever since that night I had Lickitung physically taken from me, I have debated how to handle AMOGs. The conundrum is that you don't want to over react and come off as a chode, but you also don't want to be too passive because chicks do have the capacity to leave you for another guy. So what do you do?
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If you are trying to pull, exposing your chick to surrounding guys will not help your chances in anyway. If she is trying to meet friends DO WHAT IT FUCKING TAKES TO HAVE HER NOT MEET THEM. This sounds manipulative and I try to preach what VP calls "good guy game" but I'm serious. You can be a little crafty and still be a good person. Your hierarchy of needs should go You>your chick>her friends.
As far as physically deflecting the cockbock, there is a pretty good video out there that shows some examples of what you can dohttps://
www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLhEAFk7CA8. To summarize it, you deflect AMOGs by being strong in controlling the frame. Having a strong frame is a key trait that will make you successful in not only game, but in life. It might be the most important fundamental that RSD preaches in my opinion. Your reality has to be stronger than everyone else's around you. This is how you get what you want in life. In a nonreactive way, simply control the fate of the situation from the very beginning. If you sense that you are about to get robbed, your goal is to subtly make it as hard as possible for anyone to take your girl. I would probably like to put a side-note on this. You shouldn't get paranoid about losing the girl you are with at any second. If you have a girl that is heavily invested in you, it is very unlikely that a regular chode can pull your girl. All of the times I have been "robbed" involved girls that I knew had little to no investment in me to begin with. You are still in this limbo stage at this point (I guess regular people would call it dating). You are playing the game whether you like it or not so you might as well play it well.
5/27/14
Don't "game" yourself out of a good thing. Stop and ask yourself if you are being congruent with your thoughts words and actions. Be uninhibited.
Always remember the girl's name. If you are invested enough in a person to have a conversation with him/her, you should know what their name is.
7/29/14
I have watched in field footage of some of my approaches. I seemed nervous and talked too quickly. I also find myself doing little habitual movements when I'm nervous. I'm going to take a regular public speaking class to get over some of these things. I'm also going to consciously retrain myself to relax and make slow movements. Nervous feelings can be channeled via different ways.