How to handle the end when both still in love? Need advice

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 11:41 pm 
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So, my girlfriend and I have just broken up. It was her idea not mine but I understood. Although I made it clear I wasn’t convinced, and that we should try again, she didn’t want to give me another chance. It was too late.

We were housemates and within 2 weeks of moving in together (a 3 person house) we started sleeping together. After a few months this turned to casual dating and then more serious dating. We then had a massive argument which was very very messy and she moved out the same day and we stopped seeing each other.

A couple weeks later after it all settled we both were missing each other a crazy amount and with the help of mutual friends (we have many) we met one night, made up and officially became boyfriend/girlfriend.

We then dated for 6 months after that, however it was bumpy with extreme highs and lows. Her close friends didn’t like me because they didn’t think I treated her right. During this time we both did stupid things but mine were a little worse and harder to explain - I’d say and do stupid things too often and never show her any emotion to her, compliment her etc.

The last two weeks were rough and we hadn’t had sex at all during it.

This past Saturday I said something to her which was really bad. That night we talked and almost broke up (I was an emotional mess as I was very drunk), but so was she. We agreed to meet during the week for dinner to talk about it.

I knew it was over. During the dinner last night we held hands, kissed and flirted a lot (she’s often commented when I starred at her that “this isn’t helping!!”) but at the end she said she didn’t want to continue. I apologised for the first time ever for the things I’d done and she was surprised. I tried to change her mind (a mistake, I know!) but it was pointless. She said during the dinner she still wanted to still see me (for sex - according to her closest friends it’s the best sex she’s ever had) but I said it wasn’t a good idea.

After dinner, I asked if she wanted to come over to fuck one last time and she didn’t hesitate at all. It was as always, EXTREMELY good. She didn’t want to stay the night and left. I made it clear if we break up that I don’t want her in my life again.

She’s 23 and I’m 26. I’m highly successful in my career and girls seem to find me attractive (tall, muscly, tattooed etc). She was always very jealous. She’s outgoing and energetic but recently been down because she has no money, a lot of debt and doesn’t know what she wants to do in life.

Truth is I’m still madly in love with her and she said she was too last night. That night when I was an emotional mess was a turning point for me - I opened up a lot but she said it was too late. We’ve now removed each other from social media (she said she couldn’t bare see me with other girls) but still have a lot of mutual friends.

I still would like another chance with her but she feels hurt by things I’ve done and wants to move on, despite openly telling me she’s still madly in love and crazy attracted to me.

Apart from no contact, what other things would you recommend to make her re-evaluate her thoughts/miss me enough? Would sleeping with her regularly be a bad idea (I feel like the lack of sex in the end contributed to the break up)?

As I said there was a turning point for me when I was drunk and emotional and it had changed me for the better, but too late.

Thanks!! :)

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