Remorse/Guilt



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 Post subject: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 12:40 am 
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Ok, had a long term 17 year relationship, the girl really loved me, at first I was really into her and had a lot of sex, over the years I became less interested in being with her sexually , we went thru a lot, job losses, moving across country. We basically became roommates, I got a really stressful job and that hurt our sex life, I had to get up early and she stayed up watching tv so we slept in different rooms the last year

I wish I had given her more attention, why didn't I? Is it because she made it so easy and I got spoiled? Or was I not that into her from the start and subconsciously did not put in effort? she blames it all on me


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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:40 pm 
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Sounds pretty usual to me. Go out and meet someone new. Not everything could have been your fault.


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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Tue Jun 13, 2017 3:33 pm 
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I wish I had given her more attention, why didn't I? Is it because she made it so easy and I got spoiled? Or was I not that into her from the start and subconsciously did not put in effort? she blames it all on me
Ofcourse she blames it all on you. People don't usually evaluate their own mistakes/flaws and go logical about breakups.

That said, your relationship ended. Who's at fault doesn't really matter. You didn't work out, which means you weren't compatible. It sucks, naturally, but it is what it is and you need to move on.

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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Tue Jun 13, 2017 3:52 pm 
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Ok, had a long term 17 year relationship, the girl really loved me, at first I was really into her and had a lot of sex, over the years I became less interested in being with her sexually , we went thru a lot, job losses, moving across country. We basically became roommates, I got a really stressful job and that hurt our sex life, I had to get up early and she stayed up watching tv so we slept in different rooms the last year

I wish I had given her more attention, why didn't I? Is it because she made it so easy and I got spoiled? Or was I not that into her from the start and subconsciously did not put in effort? she blames it all on me
Congratulations. You know all those girls you were fantasizing about fucking while you were together? Now you can.

Remember how fun new sex was? You get to experience that again!

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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Sat Jun 17, 2017 8:25 am 
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Remember how fun new sex was? You get to experience that again!
On multiple occasions, unless you fall for the first girl.


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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Sat Jun 24, 2017 9:37 pm 
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Quote:
I wish I had given her more attention, why didn't I? Is it because she made it so easy and I got spoiled? Or was I not that into her from the start and subconsciously did not put in effort? she blames it all on me
Ofcourse she blames it all on you. People don't usually evaluate their own mistakes/flaws and go logical about breakups.

That said, your relationship ended. Who's at fault doesn't really matter. You didn't work out, which means you weren't compatible. It sucks, naturally, but it is what it is and you need to move on.
You are very smart, I am beating myself up about it, 17 years, we moved to another state together, everything reminds me of her, I want to move out of the area as I dont have any friends here anyways, she was basically my social life.


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 Post subject: Re: Remorse/Guilt
PostPosted: Sat Jun 24, 2017 9:56 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
I wish I had given her more attention, why didn't I? Is it because she made it so easy and I got spoiled? Or was I not that into her from the start and subconsciously did not put in effort? she blames it all on me
Ofcourse she blames it all on you. People don't usually evaluate their own mistakes/flaws and go logical about breakups.

That said, your relationship ended. Who's at fault doesn't really matter. You didn't work out, which means you weren't compatible. It sucks, naturally, but it is what it is and you need to move on.
Thank you, I really did love her, you're very smart, thing is we lived in this one area for so long, everything reminds me of her.


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