I've lurked and read here for a while but never posted. I decided to do so for the first time today because my life needs to be changed and I am the only one who can do that, but some help and advice wouldn't got amiss. I also have some questions I need answering and some areas I need to work on when it comes to interacting with women.
After signing up for Chief's Newsletter I decided to follow his advice and start a journal and list what it is I am looking for in my ideal woman. At the moment I'm not entirely sure I want a girlfriend but I wouldn't say no if I found the girl who ticked enough of the boxes.
1. Likes to keep fit and healthy.
2. Bubbly personality.
3. Gets/enjoys my sense of humour.
7. Well read.
8. Loves going to the cinema.
9. Won't try to change/manage me.
So there's my ideal woman, as far as I know. If anything on that list changes or needs something added I shall edit it.
I thought I would discuss a little about myself and go into detail about some of my goals and the situation I am in so far.
I'm twenty-four years old (in a week) and I am currently living at home with my mother and little brother. After college, between 2010 & 2012 I traveled throughout various parts of the world and enjoyed a very carefree lifestyle. I had been reading about pick-up on these forums and other parts of the internet and I was able to implement some of what I read quite effectively, I even managed the occasional same day lay.
However, after unforeseen circumstances, I had to come back to the UK leaving my self employed nomadic lifestyle behind. I came back and I've not been able to find work, failed to get into university and have to live in a town where I may actually be the only person in his twenties left.
That being said I am going to change everything over the next few years.
What I want:
At the moment I want to either find a job, get into university or both. My ambition is to become a screenwriter. How I am going to go about that is dependent on the way certain things go. What I mean by that is as follows:
If I am able to get a job I plan on saving up as much money as possible, while writing in my spare time, and move to LA in a year and really give it a go. This isn't necessary to write for film but will help in changing my life for the better and spurring me on to work harder towards what it is I want.
I am going to get onto a university course that I am trying to apply for that is directly related to screenwriting. While there I am going to work on perfecting my craft until I am able to move to LA in the year that we are allowed to apply for one years paid work as part of the learning process.
1a. Get a job.
1b. Get into university.
2. Finish three screenplays within the year.
Onto my next set of problems.
Just now I am involved with a girl who is quite nice but doesn't tick enough of the boxes for me to want anything serious or long term. We are sleeping together and it's a lot of fun, especially since I feel I need the practice some times, particularly after the dry spell I went through, and she is more than happy to help.
The problem I am encountering at the moment is making sure she understands that I don't want anything serious.
I have read some of the arms length and managing expectations articles on this subject but I don't want to be horrible or hurt this girl, and I also don't want to lose what it is we have just now as it is of a benefit to me, especially since sarging is proving difficult given the location I'm in and the lack of transport to get to more populated areas.
So, without being a dick, how do I ensure that this doesn't become about more than sex and how do I make it clear I don't want anything serious?
As a little side note I'll explain what it is that has happened and what it is "we have". I met her years ago through a friend from college, she had a boyfriend, I never indicated I was into her and she was the same.
A few weeks ago I found her email in my inbox and decided to see if she still used it. She got in touch and gave me her number. We text for a couple of days and I asked to meet her for coffee, she agreed. She said while we were texting each other that her sister would be out of town so she had a free house.
We met for coffee, grabbed a pizza, went back to hers and I stayed the night. I didn't fuck her but I kiss closed and we fooled around while in bed. We met up twice more then had sex. We went out for sushi the other night then back to hers and, instead of going to a party, stayed in and had sex.
Now she's wanting to go for walks, hang out a bit more, come to my place, and have sex. I'm fine with the last part but not the rest.
So, any thoughts on the above part?
As far as pick up goals go I think they are quite generic, but still important:
1. Reduce AA
2. Get back some of the confidence I've lost/improve inner game.
3. Improve Outer Game (I'm currently working out 6 days a week to help with 2. & 3. I'm doing so in my dining room as I can't afford the gym).
4. Improve in bed.
5a. Find two or more suitable Fuck buddies.
5b. Find a woman who ticks enough of the boxes on my ideal list.
That's about it for the moment, I think. It's getting late and I've written more than I intended to. I'll keep adding to this as often as is applicable.
Thanks for reading,
(I chose the name for a couple of reasons 1. He's a good writer, and one of my favourites. 2. He's a bad ass. 3. Corey Stoll's performance as Hemingway in one of my all time favourite films, Midnight in Paris, cemented number 2 for me).