Forum rules


Relationship Subforum Rules

1. Posts about how to get a girlfriend will result in a ban.


2. Posts about your ex-girlfriend will result in a ban.

3. Any other posts not related to your current girlfriend will result in a ban.



Author Message
 Post subject: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 5:57 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2017 4:41 pm
Posts: 5
Hi guys,

So I was in LTR with my co-worker for 3 months. Everything was great until all of a sudden she wanted to break up. I asked her why and she said she felt empty. She lost her interest in me. She used to look forward meeting me on the weekend to go on a date, but not anymore.
She also mentioned that she didn't feel like someone special to me.

By no means i am here to ask how to get her back. I am just wondering how could this happen ? Did i do something wrong ?


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 6:04 am 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
How long were you dating before you started the relationship? I'm asking because you may be another in a long line of victims of the two month rule.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 8:09 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2015 3:06 am
Posts: 2540
Quote:
Hi guys,

So I was in LTR with my co-worker for 3 months. Everything was great until all of a sudden she wanted to break up. I asked her why and she said she felt empty. She lost her interest in me. She used to look forward meeting me on the weekend to go on a date, but not anymore.
She also mentioned that she didn't feel like someone special to me.

By no means i am here to ask how to get her back. I am just wondering how could this happen ? Did i do something wrong ?

If you were only seeing her on a weekend night, you weren't in a relationship. You were a fuck buddy.

Sounds like a communication issue, which makes sense since you barely saw her.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 8:25 am 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 1:53 pm
Posts: 5428
Location: Romania
Quote:
If you were only seeing her on a weekend night, you weren't in a relationship. You were a fuck buddy.
Not necessarily.


@OP, did she want a relationship or did you?

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 2:23 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2017 4:41 pm
Posts: 5
Quote:
How long were you dating before you started the relationship? I'm asking because you may be another in a long line of victims of the two month rule.
I only dated her for a month before we got into LTR. What is two month rule ?
Quote:
If you were only seeing her on a weekend night, you weren't in a relationship. You were a fuck buddy.
Sounds like a communication issue, which makes sense since you barely saw her.
I see her everyday in the office. I work in the same team with her. I believe communication is not the problem here, we used to text all night when we got back from work.
Quote:
Quote:
If you were only seeing her on a weekend night, you weren't in a relationship. You were a fuck buddy.
Not necessarily.

@OP, did she want a relationship or did you?
Back then, she asked me things such as why did I ask her out ? Why did I choose her out of all the HB in the office ? etc. I perceived this as her wanting LTR rather than being just a weekend date buddy and I initiated the relationship talk. She did open up to more physical contact though after the relationship talk.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 3:18 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Quote:
only dated her for a month before we got into LTR. What is two month rule ?
It's a pattern that happens with women (I haven't been able to see it with men) that quickly jump into relationships with men. It usually takes about two months for women to see a man for who he is realistically and the infatuation that kept her attracted regardless of all the flaws or red flags that may have been present wears off. It's somewhere about two months where the guy will either notice that she's acting different, she is questioning if she wants to be in the relationship, or she abruptly ends the relationship.

I've been thinking about writing a thread on it for the last few weeks. Maybe I'll get around to it over the next few days.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 5:22 pm 
Offline
King Among Mortals
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2011 8:36 pm
Posts: 7592
Location: United States
Quote:
I perceived this as her wanting LTR rather than being just a weekend date buddy and I initiated the relationship talk. She did open up to more physical contact though after the relationship talk.
This is you doing her job. You pushed for something more than she's ready for. Women will let YOU know this shit.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 6:27 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2015 3:06 am
Posts: 2540
Quote:
Quote:
I perceived this as her wanting LTR rather than being just a weekend date buddy and I initiated the relationship talk. She did open up to more physical contact though after the relationship talk.
This is you doing her job. You pushed for something more than she's ready for. Women will let YOU know this shit.

Yep. And they'll bounce if they're not ready.

She bounced.

If you follow my five basic rules, women will not leave you, whether it's two months or twelve.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 6:50 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
I perceived this as her wanting LTR rather than being just a weekend date buddy and I initiated the relationship talk. She did open up to more physical contact though after the relationship talk.
This is you doing her job. You pushed for something more than she's ready for. Women will let YOU know this shit.

Yep. And they'll bounce if they're not ready.

She bounced.

If you follow my five basic rules, women will not leave you, whether it's two months or twelve.
Before you start throwing up pictures and signs, this is a serious question. Did your girlfriend start spotting flaws in your personality in around two months and it cause you to have to adjust your behavior towards her because you were at risk of losing her? Careful, because you've already answered this question in a previous post. IMO, the goal for a guy that's good with women is never to have to adjust his behavior to keep a woman around. When the magic wears off, they should want to still be around without you having to change the core behavior that you've shown her from day 1.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 7:50 am 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 1:53 pm
Posts: 5428
Location: Romania
You should always let women come to you with the relationship talk. No hints, no vague questions you interpret one way or another, no nothing. Let her be the one bringing exclusivity up.

As far as this goes, I tend to agree with Jack. In my opinion it's the first 3 months that are the make or break of a relationship.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 3:26 pm 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title

Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:34 pm
Posts: 3993
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
I perceived this as her wanting LTR rather than being just a weekend date buddy and I initiated the relationship talk. She did open up to more physical contact though after the relationship talk.
This is you doing her job. You pushed for something more than she's ready for. Women will let YOU know this shit.

Yep. And they'll bounce if they're not ready.

She bounced.

If you follow my five basic rules, women will not leave you, whether it's two months or twelve.
Arch what are these 5 basic rules?


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 6:00 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2017 4:41 pm
Posts: 5
Quote:
It's a pattern that happens with women (I haven't been able to see it with men) that quickly jump into relationships with men. It usually takes about two months for women to see a man for who he is realistically and the infatuation that kept her attracted regardless of all the flaws or red flags that may have been present wears off. It's somewhere about two months where the guy will either notice that she's acting different, she is questioning if she wants to be in the relationship, or she abruptly ends the relationship.

I've been thinking about writing a thread on it for the last few weeks. Maybe I'll get around to it over the next few days.
I would love to read your thread about the topic. Please post the link here if you have finished the thread. Thanks in advance mate.
Quote:
This is you doing her job. You pushed for something more than she's ready for. Women will let YOU know this shit.
Quote:
Yep. And they'll bounce if they're not ready.

She bounced.

If you follow my five basic rules, women will not leave you, whether it's two months or twelve.
Gotta admit that was my mistake initiating the relationship talk. But what's done is done, I won't repeat the same mistake in the future.

@Arch Stanton You mind sharing those five basic rules ?


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 6:24 pm 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title

Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:34 pm
Posts: 3993
Quote:
Hi guys,

So I was in LTR with my co-worker for 3 months. Everything was great until all of a sudden she wanted to break up. I asked her why and she said she felt empty. She lost her interest in me. She used to look forward meeting me on the weekend to go on a date, but not anymore.
She also mentioned that she didn't feel like someone special to me.

By no means i am here to ask how to get her back. I am just wondering how could this happen ? Did i do something wrong ?
"Felt empty" typically implies not feeling a connection.

Often the case when the two of you have incompatible values/too much friction (at different points in your lives), you're overwrought with anxious energy making it impossible to stay present and enjoy the interaction, and/or you tried to force a relationship. Any or all of these can be a recipe for lacking that 'spark' in the beginning stages of a relationship.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 6:42 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2017 4:41 pm
Posts: 5
Quote:
Before you start throwing up pictures and signs, this is a serious question. Did your girlfriend start spotting flaws in your personality in around two months and it cause you to have to adjust your behavior towards her because you were at risk of losing her? Careful, because you've already answered this question in a previous post. IMO, the goal for a guy that's good with women is never to have to adjust his behavior to keep a woman around. When the magic wears off, they should want to still be around without you having to change the core behavior that you've shown her from day 1.
Quote:
You should always let women come to you with the relationship talk. No hints, no vague questions you interpret one way or another, no nothing. Let her be the one bringing exclusivity up.

As far as this goes, I tend to agree with Jack. In my opinion it's the first 3 months that are the make or break of a relationship.
Not sure if she spotted my flaws during the relationship. I did spot her flaws though. I believe i didn't adjust my behaviour on the brink of losing her. Instead, I froze her out for a week when she told me she was unsure about the relationship and needed the time to think. Which then a week later, she wanted to break up.

She used to say she misses me when we didn't meet on the weekend, but during the last three weeks of the relationship, we didn't meet on the weekend due to our personal matters. Yet when we had the time, she refused when i asked her out and out of nowhere she wanted to break up.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: GF losing interest
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 6:49 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5962
Location: Los Angeles
Quote:
Quote:
Before you start throwing up pictures and signs, this is a serious question. Did your girlfriend start spotting flaws in your personality in around two months and it cause you to have to adjust your behavior towards her because you were at risk of losing her? Careful, because you've already answered this question in a previous post. IMO, the goal for a guy that's good with women is never to have to adjust his behavior to keep a woman around. When the magic wears off, they should want to still be around without you having to change the core behavior that you've shown her from day 1.
Quote:
You should always let women come to you with the relationship talk. No hints, no vague questions you interpret one way or another, no nothing. Let her be the one bringing exclusivity up.

As far as this goes, I tend to agree with Jack. In my opinion it's the first 3 months that are the make or break of a relationship.
Not sure if she spotted my flaws during the relationship. I did spot her flaws though. I believe i didn't adjust my behaviour on the brink of losing her. Instead, I froze her out for a week when she told me she was unsure about the relationship and needed the time to think. Which then a week later, she wanted to break up.

She used to say she misses me when we didn't meet on the weekend, but during the last three weeks of the relationship, we didn't meet on the weekend due to our personal matters. Yet when we had the time, she refused when i asked her out and out of nowhere she wanted to break up.
Flaws may be a strong word and can be too broad of a stroke when trying to sum up my thoughts in a single paragraph. I think N2's term of incompatible values may be a better way of stating it. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're doing or not doing something wrong, it just means she isn't feeling like her needs for a relationship are being met or even that she's feeling that she can't live up to your needs.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 21 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link