My girl is sexting other guys


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 05, 2017 10:04 pm 
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billmincersucks wrote:
Show up better? And how would you suggest?


I already advised how. For starters, don't buy dinners for a woman who clearly doesn't respect you.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 6:57 am 
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billmincersucks wrote:
So I met this girl on tinder about a month ago and we hit it off. Been banging her regularly since the second date and spending lots of our free time together. I'm happy, she seems really happy but I did notice she texts lots of guys even while with me. She did tell me how most of her friends are guys because she hates friendships with girls and was even telling me about how some of these guys are gay and also one that's messed up from fighting in Iraq that will probably never have anyone because of his emotional state. I was also cool and said that until anything is official, as in bf/gf, you're free to text whomever you want(as I except the same in return). So we were out last night and having dinner at a local bar, I notice she's texting a ton and as I look over at her I can see part of the screen. It's a guy, and I see mmmmm and he's talking about giving her his cock and how they are going to meet up Saturday and he wants her to wear a skirt. I'm just thinking wtf and play it cool the rest of the night. We go home, cuddle and fall asleep. Sex in the morning. She wants to see me Saturday. So what do I make of this? Am I handling it right? Thinking too much?


She's not your girlfriend so as far as that goes she's free to do whatever. But, I find it in bad taste that she's talking about getting fucked while eating dinner with you. I mean have some fucking awareness, right? At least enough to not get spotted.

Either way, what I find the problem here is not necessarily that, but the fact that you were obviously deranged by it, and yet said nothing.
If I'm out with someone and they're glued to their phone, I tell them to stop.

Arch Stanton wrote:
Too many guys on this forum are lushes. Blacking out and getting wasted is beta behavior.

and no, my friend, if you were REALLY showing up in bed, she wouldn't be sexting guys.


The hell does this have to do with anything? This isn't his girlfriend. It's some chick he's fucking. She can be sexting/fucking as many guys as she wants. Has nothing to do with how good OP is.


Anyway OP, except for what I mentioned above, you don't have much to call her out on.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 8:55 pm 
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Not going to lie but this some real 'female behaviour' as in getting butthurt over something you have no right too.

She's not your girlfriend, you haven't decided to be exclusive so you are both free to do w.e you want.


Arch Stanton wrote:
Right now, you're the nice guy bitch who buys her dinner and takes care of her without her being emotionally invested enough to want to be exclusive...while she sexts other guys who excite her.

If you want her in your life and to respect you, get her off the pedestal and treat her in a way congruent with what you are: friends with benefits, nothing else. No dinners, no emotional texts, no listening to her problems with her kids, etc. Just fucking...nothing more nothing less. Date other women, too.


Seem to be missing out on the friends part of being fwb.... Nothing wrong with OP being a decent human being to the girl he is fucking..... The problem is OP hasn't tried to define the relationship and is now thinking he has a right to be hurt about what the girl is doing.


Last edited by anaselies on Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 9:56 pm 
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Arch Stanton wrote:

If you want her in your life and to respect you, get her off the pedestal and treat her in a way congruent with what you are: friends with benefits, nothing else. No dinners, no emotional texts, no listening to her problems with her kids, etc. Just fucking...nothing more nothing less.


Dont really agree with this. In the pre-exclusivity stage of "dating" you're meant to actually date the girl. Nothing wrong with dinner, spending time with her IMO if she is someone you see as having "exclusive" potential. How can a woman see your worth as a potential partner if all you do with her is Netflix and chill?

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:04 pm 
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Oh boy. Here comes the explanation of how 9's and 10's hate it when guys take them to dinners because that's what all the other lame guys do and how they just want to be banged by a dominant man.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 12:12 am 
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Slick_uk wrote:
Dont really agree with this. In the pre-exclusivity stage of "dating" you're meant to actually date the girl. Nothing wrong with dinner, spending time with her IMO if she is someone you see as having "exclusive" potential.


That's an incredibly needy way to start a first date. An emotionally-centered man with options understands that relationships happen organically, and over time. He does not see "exclusive potential" before the first date, or he is desperate.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 1:49 am 
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Arch Stanton wrote:
Slick_uk wrote:
Dont really agree with this. In the pre-exclusivity stage of "dating" you're meant to actually date the girl. Nothing wrong with dinner, spending time with her IMO if she is someone you see as having "exclusive" potential.


That's an incredibly needy way to start a first date. An emotionally-centered man with options understands that relationships happen organically, and over time. He does not see "exclusive potential" before the first date, or he is desperate.
This is the kind of vilification on trivial things need to stop. Constant texting of a girl asking how she's doing or what she's doing multiple times of the day is needy. Taking a girl out to dinner on a first date isn't a needy thing unless you are trying to do it to impress her. While some guys can't be interesting in an environment like this, other guys may excel. It's the ability to make the girl feel good because she is with you that's important. If your actions come from a needy place then yes, you are needy. If you are doing something because that's what you like to do, then there is no justification for calling it needy.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 7:58 am 
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Arch Stanton wrote:
Slick_uk wrote:
Dont really agree with this. In the pre-exclusivity stage of "dating" you're meant to actually date the girl. Nothing wrong with dinner, spending time with her IMO if she is someone you see as having "exclusive" potential.


That's an incredibly needy way to start a first date. An emotionally-centered man with options understands that relationships happen organically, and over time. He does not see "exclusive potential" before the first date, or he is desperate.


Who said anything about first dates? Regardless, if your first date with a woman is "Netflix & Chill", you're not going to get very far. Especially when there's potentially other guys available to her who would take her on a proper date.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 8:19 am 
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Slick_uk wrote:
Especially when there's potentially other guys available to her who would take her on a proper date.


Actually that's not necessarily true. Women want sex and they likely want it more than you and I. Whether she comes back to your place on a first or 3rd date can be influenced by a few different factors, but once she's already decided she wants to have sex with you, she wants to be at your house, not on a "proper date", whatever that means.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 10:34 am 
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R.C wrote:
Slick_uk wrote:
Especially when there's potentially other guys available to her who would take her on a proper date.


Actually that's not necessarily true. Women want sex and they likely want it more than you and I. Whether she comes back to your place on a first or 3rd date can be influenced by a few different factors, but once she's already decided she wants to have sex with you, she wants to be at your house, not on a "proper date", whatever that means.


This 100%.. Women fucking enjoy sex more then we do (if your decent in bed) so why in gods name would they not want it more then us?

Women do generally want an excuse for it to happen and a date/ activity is an excuse to be in a position where it can happen.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 11:23 am 
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R.C wrote:
Slick_uk wrote:
Especially when there's potentially other guys available to her who would take her on a proper date.


Actually that's not necessarily true. Women want sex and they likely want it more than you and I. Whether she comes back to your place on a first or 3rd date can be influenced by a few different factors, but once she's already decided she wants to have sex with you, she wants to be at your house, not on a "proper date", whatever that means.


Of course they want it, I didn't say they didn't? But sex is a bigger emotional investment for them and with girls, their friends are as big a deciding factor as they are. A guy giving a girl great sex and good dates will always trump the guy who's just giving her sex. Plus how would you know yourself if you want to pursue a relationship with a woman if you're just having sex with her? Investing time in a woman is as beneficial to you as it is to her. Just make sure her investment in dates, at very least, matches yours.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 1:35 pm 
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Slick_uk wrote:
Of course they want it, I didn't say they didn't? But sex is a bigger emotional investment for them and with girls, their friends are as big a deciding factor as they are. A guy giving a girl great sex and good dates will always trump the guy who's just giving her sex. Plus how would you know yourself if you want to pursue a relationship with a woman if you're just having sex with her? Investing time in a woman is as beneficial to you as it is to her. Just make sure her investment in dates, at very least, matches yours.


What's their friends have to do with it?

Aside from that you stated that if your first date with a woman is netflix and chill you won't get far, because there's other people willing to take them on proper dates. I said that's not true. If she has already decided she wants to fuck you, she won't care about other dudes and furthermore, you taking her on 3 dates before that happens might very well change her mind.
And that says nothing about how your relationship evolves from that point onward and whether or not it will become exclusive.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 1:41 pm 
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if your first date with a woman is "Netflix & Chill", you're not going to get very far. Especially when there's potentially other guys available to her who would take her on a proper date.


Women decide very early on whether or not they would fuck you. You just need to lead them to it.
If she is willing to Netflix and chill on the 1st date......she has decided.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 2:27 pm 
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Pretty sure this is the relationship, not dating part of the forum. Too many replies focus on the poster's dick. Maybe it's different where you are but if I want to date someone I want to get to know them a little and decide if further down the line, if things continue to go well, that I would want to spend my time with them. I actually had this conversation with my girlfriend last night about a mutual friend and who she was dating...

"I thought her and X were dating?"
"no, they were just Netflix and chilling until Y came along and took her out"

Hearing how girls at work talk about guys, the Netflix and Chillers all fall into the fuckboy category and don't last long. The ones who fuck the girl properly and go on proper dates too, almost always win in the long term.

Women are very easily influenced by their friends and their opinions and usually involve their friends in conversations about their dating. Most women would tell their friend not to go on a first date with a guy at his house, however much she wants to fuck him. Remember too how easy it is for a woman to get sex, they want more than that these days.

As much as it is arbitrary bullshit like The Game, reading the female equivalent The Rules, is helpful in understanding dating from a Woman's perspective.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 2:42 pm 
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Slick_uk wrote:
Pretty sure this is the relationship, not dating part of the forum. Too many replies focus on the poster's dick. Maybe it's different where you are but if I want to date someone I want to get to know them a little and decide if further down the line, if things continue to go well, that I would want to spend my time with them. I actually had this conversation with my girlfriend last night about a mutual friend and who she was dating...

"I thought her and X were dating?"
"no, they were just Netflix and chilling until Y came along and took her out"

Hearing how girls at work talk about guys, the Netflix and Chillers all fall into the fuckboy category and don't last long. The ones who fuck the girl properly and go on proper dates too, almost always win in the long term.

Women are very easily influenced by their friends and their opinions and usually involve their friends in conversations about their dating. Most women would tell their friend not to go on a first date with a guy at his house, however much she wants to fuck him. Remember too how easy it is for a woman to get sex, they want more than that these days.

As much as it is arbitrary bullshit like The Game, reading the female equivalent The Rules, is helpful in understanding dating from a Woman's perspective.
Hold on. Are you saying that you can't get to know someone and have sex with them at the same time? Does that really make a lot of sense to you?


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