Girl seems to have changed after becoming exclusive.


Go to page 1, 2  Next
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Tools & Techniques of Game: Meeting, Attracting and Seducing Women » Relationships


Forum rules


Relationship Subforum Rules

1. Posts about how to get a girlfriend will result in a ban.


2. Posts about your ex-girlfriend will result in a ban.

3. Any other posts not related to your current girlfriend will result in a ban.



Author Message
PostPosted: Wed Sep 06, 2017 3:13 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
I'm going to avoid writing an essay but some advice would be very helpful.

A little background on the issue is someone I was dating passed away in April this year and since then I have been focusing on myself etc. Started seeing someone, who i have history with, around June who was in a relationship and ended that relationship around early August. She was unhappy in her relationship cheating on her boyfriend with me.

Until I went on holiday in Mid August everything was fine, we had fun, had good sex and everything was casual. The day before I left she asked me if I saw a future with her and I replied if we continue just being us and living in the moment I don't see why either of us would want that to end. She replied she say a future with me too. Everything was drama free at that time.

Anyways while I was on holiday I suffered a head injury and was overly worried about me, messaging me constantly etc, she also told me she was on Tinder social (and showed me screen shot conversations) to help her friend who has had issues dating, She asked if i was ok with that and I replied yeah. At this time also her ex bf started harrassing us on FB and instagram with fake accounts bringing drama into our lives.

Long story short we had the 'talk' and agreed to be exclusive with each other.. But now that I have been back she seems different, the conversations are less flirty and more one word/ one sentence/ I'm home safe etc or about the drama her ex is causing.

I realized this and straight up asked her if everything was ok because things seemed different since we became exclusive and that i'd rather not be exclusive if it meant things would be normal again, she replied she was ok and that she was just stressed with the stalking and her grandmothers health issue.

I haven't seen her yet because we have been busy (due to see her Friday) and wondering what should I do? I don't know if I should relax and see how it is in person and trust her reasoning or If she's just changed because she has removed 'my abundance'.

Thanks


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 8:49 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Oct 04, 2007 8:22 pm
Posts: 193
Who brought up the exclusivity chat?

I've had an exact situation like this before, almost identical 4 years ago. But I bought the exclusively up after she hinted about the future she wanted with me. Turned out she wasn't actually ready to be exclusive and her abusive ex had got in touch with her not long after and messed with her head. After finding out she had been talking to him and another guy, I ended it. She came rune back to me crying, but I relegated her to FWB until I found someone more deserving of my time.

This was a big lesson learnt for me in relationships, I hope the same pattern doesn't play out with you.

_________________
REBORN


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 9:07 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2015 3:06 am
Posts: 2253
anaselies wrote:
A little background on the issue is someone I was dating passed away in April this year and since then I have been focusing on myself etc.



That's awful, man. My condolences.


Quote:
Long story short we had the 'talk' and agreed to be exclusive with each other


When a man says "we", it usually means "him". Was this talk while you were away, or back home with her?


Quote:
I haven't seen her yet because we have been busy (due to see her Friday)


So you had a conversation about exclusivity over text?

Damn. usually they'll bring it up after you make them orgasm a couple times in bed, while holding you after. It kind of "seals things" a little more organically than text/phone.

Quote:
and wondering what should I do? I don't know if I should relax and see how it is in person and trust her reasoning or If she's just changed because she has removed 'my abundance'.



Just chill, man. Give her some space, and be the fun, in the moment guy you've always been. Watch the serious/Debbie Downer talk to fun ratio.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 9:24 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
The way exclusivity came up was by text. She was talking about trusting each other while I was away etc and how she doesn't want to date other people so I tried to be playful and replied 'Might as well make you mine when I'm back then :wink: ' to which she replied 'ok we are exclusive now but I'm not your girlfriend'

Really thought maybe she's not ready hence why I just asked her, she replied so now I'm just chilling and letting what happens happens.

The problem with the Debbie downer talks is that since my holiday when my health scare came/ her ex started stalking us a lot of drama has come in which isn't particularly ours. But yeah I'm avoiding talking out 'us' or 'what we are' and just going to message her when she messages me, or when I have plans to make with her until I've seen her in person and seen how she is.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 9:31 am 
Online
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Tue May 02, 2017 12:35 am
Posts: 63
anaselies wrote:
The way exclusivity came up was by text. She was talking about trusting each other while I was away etc and how she doesn't want to date other people so I tried to be playful and replied 'Might as well make you mine when I'm back then :wink: ' to which she replied 'ok we are exclusive now but I'm not your girlfriend'

Really thought maybe she's not ready hence why I just asked her, she replied so now I'm just chilling and letting what happens happens.

The problem with the Debbie downer talks is that since my holiday when my health scare came/ her ex started stalking us a lot of drama has come in which isn't particularly ours. But yeah I'm avoiding talking out 'us' or 'what we are' and just going to message her when she messages me, or when I have plans to make with her until I've seen her in person and seen how she is.


Not dating others and being exclusive as a couple are two different things. You rushed her into into it and she is not comfortable.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 9:43 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Oct 04, 2007 8:22 pm
Posts: 193
anaselies wrote:
The way exclusivity came up was by text. She was talking about trusting each other while I was away etc and how she doesn't want to date other people so I tried to be playful and replied 'Might as well make you mine when I'm back then :wink: ' to which she replied 'ok we are exclusive now but I'm not your girlfriend'

Really thought maybe she's not ready hence why I just asked her, she replied so now I'm just chilling and letting what happens happens.

The problem with the Debbie downer talks is that since my holiday when my health scare came/ her ex started stalking us a lot of drama has come in which isn't particularly ours. But yeah I'm avoiding talking out 'us' or 'what we are' and just going to message her when she messages me, or when I have plans to make with her until I've seen her in person and seen how she is.


You're heading towards exclusivity. I would just focus on having fun and good sex with her until she is ready for it.

Also, condolences for your loss man, that must have been awful.

_________________
REBORN


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 3:25 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
Slick_uk wrote:

You're heading towards exclusivity. I would just focus on having fun and good sex with her until she is ready for it.

Also, condolences for your loss man, that must have been awful.


Thanks man it was hard and has definitely left it's mark (e.g telling parents and sister I love them too often etc) but just have to truck on and be the best me.

I agree the only issue is with her is that text communication has been off but I'm just going to let it run it's course. If she flakes for tomorrow I will probably tell her I want to remain friends and not be exclusive anymore.

Life is too short to chase girls who play games


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 7:04 pm 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title

Joined: Sat Jun 20, 2009 1:32 am
Posts: 3777
Ummm... You're considering taking exclusivity seriously with a chick who was cheating on her bf with you? And she started it by talking about trust.. You trust her? I don't know where you really expect this to go.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 8:07 pm 
Offline
King Among Mortals
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2011 8:36 pm
Posts: 7560
Location: United States
Quote:
I would just focus on having fun and good sex with her
Period.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2017 11:48 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2015 3:06 am
Posts: 2253
anaselies wrote:
The way exclusivity came up was by text. She was talking about trusting each other while I was away etc and how she doesn't want to date other people



This still reads like you brought it up (IE, "are you able to trust me, anasel?") after you showed some insecurity before your trip. I could be wrong, of course.


Quote:
so I tried to be playful and replied 'Might as well make you mine when I'm back then :wink: ' to which she replied 'ok we are exclusive now but I'm not your girlfriend'


Ah, that is one hell of an answer. a tepid response into exclusivity? Again this reads like you pressured her into it with hints too many times. This answer conveys she's not ready.


Quote:
The problem with the Debbie downer talks is that since my holiday when my health scare came/ her ex started stalking us a lot of drama has come in which isn't particularly ours. But yeah I'm avoiding talking out 'us' or 'what we are' and just going to message her when she messages me, or when I have plans to make with her until I've seen her in person and seen how she is.



Good move.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2017 9:16 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
Before i went away there was no insecurity in my opinion, i mean I was openly dating other women and open about her being able to do w.e she wants. The trust thing came up after she told me she was on tinder social and asked me if that was ok.. I replied it was none of my business and then she asked if I trusted her.

About her response maybe (that's what i'm thinking hence why I'm thinking of changing exclusivity) but again the 'not your girlfriend' thing also stems from me saying I don't want to get attached to anyone because I'm still getting over the girl I was seeing dying + her being fresh out of a relationship.

Anyways seeing her tonight and will update this with how it went. Honestly not too bothered about the result either we have a good time and things go smoothly or we don't have a good time I move on and look forward to enjoying other women.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2017 6:22 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
Well thread sorted.

She cancelled


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2017 8:16 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2015 3:06 am
Posts: 2253
Not shocked. The entire thread felt off to me. A lot of drama, very little seeing each other.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2017 8:36 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2016 7:24 am
Posts: 69
Arch Stanton wrote:
Not shocked. The entire thread felt off to me. A lot of drama, very little seeing each other.


Like i said since the BF stalking has brought in a lot of drama so I'm not surprised either. Got another date (drinks at home and chill) with a girl later on so not too fussed.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2017 8:47 pm 
Offline
The Grand Puba
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5701
Location: Los Angeles
All of this is overthinking. You were an excuse for her to leave her boyfriend that was upgraded to a rebound. Neither of those thingw usually ever work out because the initial foundation is weak. It's not weak because of you, it's weak because of her and it's not likely that you could have done anything to change this outcome. All paths would have led her to wanting to cut things off with you (unless you had a winning lottery ticket).


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 16 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link