Friends with benefits to dating? Lost ATTRACTION


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 02, 2017 5:56 pm 
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DerGoleem wrote:
I'm just gonna stop responding I feel like I've failed I'll just move on

You failed to get my point.


Not sure who you are thanking or why as you're repeating the same behaviors in spite of advice to the contrary.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 02, 2017 6:22 pm 
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If I read correctly, she's suggested to chill on Friday? But isn't sure because she's unwell? In which case not all is lost? Just hit her up Thursday night to confirm your plans. If she's unavailable, make other plans that don't involve her and don't hit her up again until she does

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 02, 2017 10:50 pm 
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DerGoleem wrote:
To be honest my emotions took over, I thought it was a good idea to contact since we only spoke once last week but hung out and had sex the weekend before.



Why do you ask for advice, then ignore it?

You're running around like a chicken. Take a deep breath. Read a book or hit the gym.



Quote:
Me: Hey down to Hang out this week?
Her: When?



She's acting like the man, because you failed to provide a firm ask-out.

always assume the girl wants to hang out. Your ask-out was passive, and lacked a specific time.

You: Hey, drinks and Netflix at my place tomorrow night, 10..


Which ask-out says "I'm a dominant male, a leader who gets to the point, and knows what he wants?"


Quote:
Me: Tomorrow 9 am or Friday is good :)
Her: Wait I'm on my period :(
Me: Aww that sucks! I wanted to kind away like never before! Ha No probs
Her: ahahahahahaha omg goshhhh
we can dab and chill how's Friday?
Me: Friday 10 am?


Dude, why are you sitting around on weekday mornings getting high?

This is not attractive.

If you don't have a job, or a career, or at least a hobby you're passionate for, ACT like it. Never make plans with women at 10 am on a weekday. You are a man with balls who has shit to do.

Notice how she brought up the period thing as soon as you dropped 9am on weekdays.

Quote:
Me: I wish I could help you out I hate being sick.


Weak. "I wish I could do anything to help you, princess who keeps me at arm's length".

Quote:
Her: It's okay, My sis puked on me like 3 times
Me: ugk! Gross you'll be normal soon I'm sure !


Men don't use the word "gross" or words like "tummy". Also, watch your use of exclamation points. you look like a hyper kid on sugar.

Take the advice you were already given. Stop blowing up her fucking phone, learn to control your emotions, and live in the moment.

If you have to, cut back on drinking and weed.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 3:35 am 
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Thanks for the reply and feed back, I wish I had mentors in real life I'm going to re-read this page everyday lol

We always set up to have sex in the morning because my parents are away at that time, I do have a job but work night shift.

Anyways I'm leaving with a female to vegas next week for 1 week, then coming back and celebrating my birthday and have stuff planned out for the whole week, I probably won't even have time to see her for the next 2 weeks

Anyways I already signed up for a gym membership and start this week.

and guess who texted me in the morning?

Her: I thought I responded sorry
Me: it's okay haha I was working
Her: I was like shit! I forgot to reply! lol
3 hours later l
Me: Yeah no worries...get well soon

I will wait and see till she hits me up if not then I'll be in vegas having a great time while she watches my snap chat story


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 7:48 am 
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Snapchat stories and girls around you dont matter if she knows she's still your priority.

Quote:
Her: I thought I responded sorry


Why even reply to this? She's saying nothing....she's saying she thought she responded, and not even responding. It's just bs...dont respond yourself. You're way too eager to talk to her.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 9:22 am 
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She sent me another message saying
Her: I've been drinking a lot of tea and medicine my friends brought me some edibles

I didn't reply, but she always replies to my messages.

I will post an update if she even contacts me, most likely she'll say that she's sorry and she's still not feeling well. I see it as our roles have reversed in the beginning I was the dominant male and she was the woman, she would initiate texts everyday telling me I make her horny I'm cute etc... I went AFC and I'll work on that

I'll just tell her I went to go to x and x with friends, I am beginning to think she just wants to do other things than sex? She always suggesting we go do other stuff like hiking or going to carnivals, but most of our meets ups are just sex, the last meet ups ended in sex

2 weeks ago we went on a camping trip, we had sex and made her orgasm then she gave me head. I got a text saying it was the best sex ever.

Anyways, all I can say is thanks for the advice


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 3:45 pm 
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If AFC was a union you'd be its boss.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:50 pm 
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I'm going to log off now


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 04, 2017 8:41 am 
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DerGoleem wrote:
I'm going to log off now


Now you're going all needy on us...

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 04, 2017 12:14 pm 
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Slick_uk wrote:
DerGoleem wrote:
I'm going to log off now


Now you're going all needy on us...


Lmao. The burn tho

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 05, 2017 1:39 am 
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DerGoleem wrote:
I'm going to log off now



Why?

Let us know what happens.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2017 2:38 am 
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If y'all wanna know here's an update

Got a text saying she was sorry we didn't get to hang out blah blah blah, I told her it's okay I went fishing. Then she said someone was being a "dick" (maybe me?). I didn't reply, she has been posting a lot of stuff about relationships on her social media lately though, I'm literally the only attractive guy she really talks too...

Haven't talked to her since Thursday, I don't really care anymore I'm gonna be in vegas. I was mourning all eeek but I crawled out of it. Time to sarge!


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2017 5:08 am 
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DerGoleem wrote:
If y'all wanna know here's an update

Got a text saying she was sorry we didn't get to hang out blah blah blah, I told her it's okay I went fishing. Then she said someone was being a "dick" (maybe me?). I didn't reply, she has been posting a lot of stuff about relationships on her social media lately though, I'm literally the only attractive guy she really talks too...

Haven't talked to her since Thursday, I don't really care anymore I'm gonna be in vegas. I was mourning all eeek but I crawled out of it. Time to sarge!


Op, no offense but you sound like a kid. And I know you're 20, but you sound more like you're 15-16. All this lets smoke at my parents house in the morning shit and bang, thats a high school thing. You got way too much free time to be going on vacation lol, and 2 week long bday plans....dude...move out of your parents house. I cant see why a 20 year old chick would even take you seriously for exclusivity, when that means a relationship of sneaking to your mom and dads place to bang, smoke and febreeze the place afterwards. Its cool in high school, but if you got money to go vegas for a week and come back to bday plans, you're fucking around with your life. All the good sex in the world, all the good looks arent going to make a 20 year old see you as relationship material when you're stuck in high school living. First thing you should do is get up and grow up. Your time shouldnt be spent on sarging women to make her jealous or whatever reason, you should start living like an ADULT. Living at home with parents and smoking in the morning before your parents come home isnt relationship material.

Another thing, chick doesnt want to be exclusive, leave her be. As in, dont try to trick her, or get her jealous to make her lock you down. Thats always to silliest thing to trick a chick into a relationship. As if yeah she didnt want to be in a relationship wth you, but you use some tactic and get her to beg you to be exclusive and thats not going to be a relationship where problems keep coming up because she didnt genuinely want it, or even worse, she just cheats. You post pictures with chicks to make her jealous. She gets jealous and to feel more in control fucks a couple guys. She then comes to you and tells you she wants to be exclusive, out of fear that you're with other women. Your plan works! Now she's your gf. But now, you have introduced resentment and she thinks, DerGolem has to much power in this relationship, let me keep my options open. She flirts with and fucks a few guys behind your back and eventually leaves. These power dynamics in starting a relationship are silly, because you introduce resentment and negative feelings which will only linger. Get your shit in order, stop sneaking women into your parents to smoke up and learn to accept when a chick doesnt want what you want. Before you waste time fucking around with snapchat stories, do something to at least have your own place to smoke and fuck. And if you want to live this morning smoke in your parents house lifestyle, dont expect women over 16 to take you seriously.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2017 8:16 am 
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Neo's on point. As usual.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2017 9:21 am 
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We'll I am working on moving out but there's literally no houses for rent, and if there is the rent is way higher than it used to be, and I want a house not an apartment, they both cost about the same anyways, and also there's been increasing crimes at apartments and I don't feel safe. I live in a small town.

We'll truth be told, she's not so mature either, I saw her on tinder and her social medial is always about wanting abboyfriend.... when we first met she's was the one trying to get me jealous telling me guy at the gym is so hot etc..I would tell her "wow if he's that sexy tell him to join us ;)" and also told me one time if I don't hang out with her, she's going to go have sex with another guy". Why would we mentioned this? I think she does like me, somehow our roles have been reveresed somehow

Thanks


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