As R.C. This is just her rationalizing her responsibility. It means nothing.

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

The reason this works is not time itself. A person can still do these things and the rumination process continues on in their minds, so they remain stuck in the attachment pattern.

What does help is when we're connecting with friends, family, and ourselves (e.g., through interests and hobbies).

So what his ex couldn't give him anymore in terms of connection (this being the core need), he got through other avenues and therefore begun to feel much better.

We all intuitively have a Needs-seeking energy within us. We unfortunately become blocked from our needs when there's guilty, shame, depression, (all of which are self-directed) and/or anger (other directed). This is why you see other guys who are stuck in anger have difficulty moving on with their lives. Or, altneratively they experience massive guilt, depression, and or shame which also keeps them locked and blocked off from their needs. When the underlying need(s) is met, we feel relieved and connected to ourselves and in some instances others.


Most people simply have a need for empathy in the wake of a failed relationship to help them become 'unstuck' and move forward. Often times people will cheat to have this (or other) need met simply because they have either an unrealistic expectation for their partner to meet their need, or they've never clearly expressed it to him/her, and perhaps feels as though their partner should just intuit it, or rather that they 'know'.

Op, I'd suggest you keep doing these things and let the innate 'miraculous' healing power inside you, that exists in every human, do its thing.

OP, you're clearly a legend, so I don't think anyone doubts that
I think this comment's kind of beautiful, assuming you see it as sarcastic. You're kind of throwing the very idea of you needing to change back in her face, implying "yeah I was always rich and delicious, and now I'm away from you, I'm more so".

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If something's not fun, it's not worth doing

So ex's who rebounding can come back ???
I am shocked, everyone here said that this is 100% finished

Anyway i am in same situation right now, 10 days of no contact and i start living
my life go in dates and move on.
I dont know if my ex come back because i was a bad boy in our relationship and her new boy
its a really nice guy with a lot of money (money can keep everyone)

But want to tell you how i will react if she want to come back, first of all i will have hard sex with her , be the best with her for a week, show her what a man i can be and when see realized that and tell me "i love you'
i would dump her and took my revenge

Please do that to this bitch

Lol. Why do you guys need to intentionally cause pain to someone for just deciding THEY DONT WANT TO BE WITH YOU. When someone dumps you, it hurts, but thats all it is. Are they supposed to stay with you forever so they don't feel your wrath for deciding they're out? Do you feel the need to hurt a girl because she decides not to go on a second date with you?

This is why PU is seen as rapey...because many of you guys feel the need to inflict pain or revenge for a girl just not being interested anymore. A girl that doesn't want you, is somehow a "bitch."

It hurts, it sucks. But when someone says I love you or that they will be your gf, it isnt a contract till death. If tomorrow they dont like you, thats their right and their choice. Stop taking it so personally because of insecurities. There are many women who don't like me, never will, don't like me anymore....but I'm fine with that because thats their right. I don't go around wishing ill on someone or wanting to cause them pain for not liking me tomorrow, you might as well start abducting girls if thats your mentality. Instead of you saying "you know what, I hurt this chick while she was with me, hopefully this new guy doesnt make the same mistakes I did and she can finally be happy"...you're thinking of revenge and ploys to hurt her more.

I'll say what it is...many of you are so insecure in yourself, that someone not wanting you, confirms your own poor self image of yourself. You can't accept a girl won't want you because if she picks another guy, it must mean you're lower than him. You cant just say hey she doesnt want what I offer, I'm fine with. Some people like vanilla, some want chocolate. Let the girl be happy man.

What Neo said...

The reason that YOU can't get your ex back is because you are insecure and your security revolves around another person. You can't walk away and be better so you remain the same loser that she left.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

So long as you remain in this mindset, and refuse to see things for what they are, a relationship that just didn't work you'll cede (give away) your power.

Until you take accountability for your actions and your situation, you haven't a hope in hell.

So long as you remain in this mindset, and refuse to see things for what they are, a relationship that just didn't work you'll cede (give away) your power.

Until you take accountability for your actions and your situation, you haven't a hope in hell.

You're overwrought with anger and out of control, signs of somebody who is strongly co-dependent. I can see why she moved on, it's scary to be honest. Only an extremely insecure girl, somebody who has such a low self opinion would settle for that.

She banged with another guy and now want to go back to her ex (the safe bet).
She thinks that this idiot loved her before so she can go back if things dont go well.

How you call a girl like this?? You will accept her back with open arms??

Why you tell that all the time?? I move on, i had sex with a younger and more sexy girl than my ex.
I going to dates and i bettering myself every day.

And i dont want her back, noone want a bitch back.
I just want to see her regret what she done to me because she acted like a bitch and i simply
tell to OP what he should do.

He must treat her like she treat him , take her back and then dump her. Would be a lot of fun LOL

Hey man, forgiveness is a virtue, which most people cannot. But if you do not forgive someone, who made mistakes to you, provided you will carry always a emotional baggage with you. So it does not mean, that you should accept her back to your arms, but let thi one go.

I've been there fella short time ago. Now i am turning my head back, it was just a mistake to take revenge from someone. I feel for you. Take care yourself bro.

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Carpe Diem, Dolce Vita...

Psychal power comes through Mental strenght.

Its not big deal, she dumped him before why he cant do the same???

You say to OP to get her back and forgive her???
She let him for a rebound, rebound boy had sex with her and then dumped her.

Now she want to go back to her ex who loved her, but if a women love dicks she will
do the same again and again. These girls are not relationship material

These girls are only for fun, nothing more serious.

I had the new young chick now, is worst than my ex. I tell her that i want her only for sex
and nothing more. If you make relationship with a chick like this one day she will dumped you
because she will want to taste a new dick.

Not all girls are like this, most girls are good and relationship material.
But girls like the OP ex deserve nothing, they are bitches and we must treat them like bitches

This is just my opinion, i am not going to forgive a bitch

As we said in your other post...there is a problem with your ego and until you fix that you are a lost cause.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

who is saying to take this girl back? Moving on and not scheming to hurt someone does not = taking them back. You really want to treat a girl like shit for a year, cheat on her, and when she decides to leave, you gotta find a way to hurt her again, because for a change you feel like shit?

Can a girl just decide NOT to continue a relationship with you and walk away without you trying to hurt her? Can a girl move on with her life without you trying to hurt her? Once a girl becomes your gf, its either she stays with you, takes your shit, or she breaks up with you and you'll try to hurt her some more. Why is not purposefully hurting someone, NOT an option?

Let me ask you a question...what could your ex have done to not be a bitch? Stayed with you forever? Gotten fat so you break up with her? Never gotten a bf?

This is all about Ego Attachment.

True love doesn't oscillate between the FEELING of love and anger. That's why you see these guys split between "I want whats best for her" to "that effing bitch I'll teach her a lesson!". When he says the former he's accessing the pain underneath the anger, when he's back to the later thought he's in the anger again. He'll switch between the two until it becomes too exhausting and he surrenders.

His ego wants to make her suffer much the way he's suffering now. And he suffers because he's holding, albeit clinging onto anger because 1) it ensures he'll always blame her for the relationship, and 2) prevents him from accessing the deep pain underneath (which is scary in itself, but the healthy way through this).

The anger is just holding him back, preventing him from moving on with her life. She's just the a symbol, something for him to focus on, it could be anyone or anything.

His thoughts are "how dare she leave me", and "I am worthless without somebody in my life", these two beliefs get at the heart of the issue but until he gets past the anger and let go he'll continue to needlessly suffer. Anger is caustic, a corrosive thing when it doesn't subside. Result of many physical and mental disorders.

Hopefully this guy gets his shit together soon so the suffering can stop and the healing begin.