If I'm posting this in the wrong part of the forum, please move. This are some of my thoughts, and if you disagree, pleae feel free to answer below. I'm not an English native speaker, so please excuse any errors.
I guess we all agree that visual porn is mostly a men thing. Some women are watching porn, but in much smaller numbers and far less. Even some of those "porn sites for women" mainly cater to gay men. Obviously I generalize, but visual porn depicts what men fantasize about, which is getting straight to the point, lots of hot girls (lesbians anyone) and !lots! of sex.
Now that we have that, the question is, is there some equivalent, that could be seen as porn for women? Yes, it's called erotica, erotic literature, erotic fiction or sometimes "romance". Remember 50 Shades of Grey? That's female porn, sold in staggering numbers. Women, and I'm generalizing, don't like large images of genitalia (men do), they don't like getting down to business the minute they see a men. That's why there are so many guys running around, desperate to get laid, because girls like to go slow.
Taking an digression into biology, the reason is simply evolutionary. For men it's more „hit and run“, as men can potentially have thousands of children, and don't have to go through pregnancy. Women on the other hand can have on average maybe 10 children, and 9 month pregancy is not only stressful but also dangerous (especially in stone age circumstances). Evolutionary speaking, what kind of characteristics in males and females will these environmental conditions favor? Would it be smart for women to have sex with the first best male they meet, or is it smarter to hold out for someone with good genes? Moreover, would it be smart to „test“ this prospective partner, if he would be a good father, who can provide for his children (and not simply run away)?
Summarized, is it smart for girls to be picky, in evolutionary terms, when it comes to choosing a partner? The answer is pretty obvious, and that's why many girls don't f*ck on the first date. It's biologically programmed, deep-wired. The same is true for men, just the other way around. What does that all means for you? You need to master the game the way girls like to play it, or you don't play.
Returning to the topic. Now that you know why girls are more picky, you might want to know where you can learn more about what girls fantasize about, how they like to roll. Here we come back to erotic fiction, to romance and love stories. Borrow 50 Shades from your mother (kidding), or go to a free erotic stories site for women, like https://noveltrove.com
. Read some of those stuff, which women love to read, to get into their mindset. You will learn that sex doesn't happen within the first minute, like in male porn, but in the extreme case maybe on page 30. Girls like it slow, they don't want your dick pics, after meeting you the first time for a quick coffee. Take your time, be confident and understand why women are different, and you will be a winner.
Now go ahead and beat me up