Approach Anticipation Excitement


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 6:09 am 
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Great post.
Elite-town for sure.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:37 pm 
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I know it was long, but like I said, it's basically a whole chapter of my e-book. I'm planning on making the whole thing somewhere around 25-30 pages in pdf format and available for free distribution...everywhere. Here and anywhere anyone wants to host it, as well as on torrent sites and more.


Hey Rye,

Great Post, any news on the e-book? Sounds amazing, really looking forward to reading...

Cheers

CHLLXX

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 12:24 am 
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Changing my mentality toward the physical and emotional response that I experience prior to an approach is a HUGE part of my success in overcoming approach discomfort. Another pickup author (Eric Disco) talked about how somebody running a mile for the first time is going to be experiencing considerable physical discomfort that, with experience, becomes part of the exhilaration of running.

I would like, however, to take a moment to share some personal experience. Having suffered from time to time from REAL anxiety, as you've defined it, I might have some insight. (To qualify this claim, there were times in college when I locked myself in my dorm room for days at a time and even more recently that I've remained alone and hungry in my apartment because I didn't want to face an encounter with people at the grocery store or the pizza delivery guy.)

Approach discomfort is a component of real social anxiety. When you DO have to go out in public, you're not only afraid of approaching others, but you're actually afraid that others might try to approach you.

Generally, I agree with what you're saying about thinking about your experience using language that helps you to cope with it more effectively. Part of the therapy that I've gone through to overcome my own anxiety is a technique called Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT.) I wanted to offer a germane counterpoint though, since there are genuine cases of approach anxiety manifested as part of a larger social anxiety disorder. There are probably one or two people reading this site that have a real problem and I'd like to make sure that they don't feel marginalized, but rather that they feel encouraged.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 1:13 am 
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ZEGlass wrote:
Changing my mentality toward the physical and emotional response that I experience prior to an approach is a HUGE part of my success in overcoming approach discomfort. Another pickup author (Eric Disco) talked about how somebody running a mile for the first time is going to be experiencing considerable physical discomfort that, with experience, becomes part of the exhilaration of running.

I would like, however, to take a moment to share some personal experience. Having suffered from time to time from REAL anxiety, as you've defined it, I might have some insight. (To qualify this claim, there were times in college when I locked myself in my dorm room for days at a time and even more recently that I've remained alone and hungry in my apartment because I didn't want to face an encounter with people at the grocery store or the pizza delivery guy.)

Approach discomfort is a component of real social anxiety. When you DO have to go out in public, you're not only afraid of approaching others, but you're actually afraid that others might try to approach you.

Generally, I agree with what you're saying about thinking about your experience using language that helps you to cope with it more effectively. Part of the therapy that I've gone through to overcome my own anxiety is a technique called Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT.) I wanted to offer a germane counterpoint though, since there are genuine cases of approach anxiety manifested as part of a larger social anxiety disorder. There are probably one or two people reading this site that have a real problem and I'd like to make sure that they don't feel marginalized, but rather that they feel encouraged.

This and pretty much all broad scoped theories, methodologies or anything to do with pickup, are aimed at people in general and not people with severe mental problems. I know quite well the difference between the two things I've described because I get anxiety attacks similar to what you mentioned getting and I know that they are extremely debilitating. Approach "discomfort", as you called it, on the other hand (which is actually what Jsmooth and myself were originally talking about introducing as a concept to the community, but which I still felt didn't aptly describe it) is NOT anxiety, it is merely discomfort over that feeling of excitement.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 7:56 am 
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Approach excitement I like it haha


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2009 2:57 am 
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That was very interesting, and upon reflecting it to my own life and my own experiences I found it to be very true. In my past wrestling tournament I would always feel a high since of *anxiety* in which my coach would tell me to think of that great pit in your stomach not as a fear but as a drive, forcing you to beat your opponent. And upon thinking like this I found i was alot more successful in my wrestling matches; in this i believe your theory ON AE to be very true.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 31, 2009 3:18 pm 
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This is an amazing thread. I had read this a couple weeks ago on the LVO3 forum and man did it help me. I've been on this forum for a little over a year now, and I just couldn't get over my AA. I would always just give up and wait till the next time I'd go out to try again. After reading the article it really catapulted me into being able to approach. I've known been talking to random people on my campus much more then I ever would have before. This is truly a great post, and I think it should be stickied in the newbie section.

Also, back at home I teach and take self-defense classes. Its martial arts for the real world, so we get a lot of police officers that train with us. I was at class one time, and one of the officers was explaining how he felt before he went into a domestic dispute situation. His palms would get sweaty, he'd feel nauseous, his skin would clam up. He used to hate the feeling; and then one day he realized that it was his body preparing him for what was to come. His body was primping him for the worst case scenario. Once he realized this, he stopped running from the feeling and started to embrace it.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 2:47 am 
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I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN STILL POST in this topic but i just wanted to say thanks man this post has changed the way i see life, and the way i will live it, i have AA for a long time and had all this material that i was scare of using but thanks to you i have become more confident this helps me get ride of the AA and have AE which i like much more. thanks man you helped my a lot with this.


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 7:09 pm 
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wow this totaly just got me pumped thank you for posting it =)... makes so much sence =D

p.s. i love these forums =D, puts the attraction forums to shame...


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 09, 2009 3:49 am 
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I didn't like this post at all... too long... too complicated......


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 8:49 pm 
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yep. long article but really insightful..

We all suffer from the same thing!

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 12:13 am 
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I dont really have Approach Anxiety or Excitement. I just go up and talk to a girl I like when I feel like it.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:20 am 
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This is some great Advice.. really helped me allot


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 5:43 pm 
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Great post i think you are going to make a lot of PUA's mad becuse no one will need their boot camps anymore haha


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 2:34 pm 
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Is the e-book already out, if yes where can we find it?


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