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Classic scenario. Girl is with one guy and wants another, and knows she can have either. It's not a challenge to get the guys, but more of an inner conflict within her and how she feels about cheating or breaking hearts. Meanwhile, you and this other chump are just standing around with your dicks in your hand hoping she let's you get it in. She has all the power and you have none, in that scenario.
So you have take the power back and let her know she can't just have you with no questions asked. You have to make it complicated for her.
Do you just say things off of what you believe or do you really have experience with women and these types of situations? The OP has more power than she does. She has a boyfriend and wants the OP. As long as the OP doesn't lose his shit trying to push the boyfriend out of the way or start playing stupid games she has no real control of the situation because she is being guided by her emotions and desire for the OP. The way he acts right now shouldn't change with the exception of returning the attraction that she feels for him and then the boyfriend becomes an obstacle for her to try get around because she's trying to get to the guy she's fantasizing about.
Don't make anything complicated. Don't try to take power back. Don't let her know anything. She's getting him by being the guy that he's already presented himself as. Too many of you guys get on here telling guys to do ill advised things that will more likely drive a woman away.
This x1000.
OP, she wants you already. The only classic scenario here is the one in which the guy has to do one thing, and one thing only, and that is to not talk himself out of a sure thing.
As far as you're concerned, the boyfriend doesn't exist. Do not ever bring him up ever again. As far as the rest is concerned, listen to Jack and Heywood.
In summary, all you have to do is put yourselves in a scenario where more things can happen.